8 mo won't eat - reassurance needed!

[annad77]

I would love advice/reassurance from anyone who has been here.

My daughter is 8 months old, nearly 9 months and I have been trying to wean her since she was 5 months. I have tried everything!

She is breastfed and until recently would not take any other form of drinking, however she has recently mastered the sippy cup and will take water and breastmilk so I am hoping to start sneaking in some formula so I can eventually give up BF.

Anyway, on the food front she barely eats a thing. She will have a chew on a breadstick or biscuit and may possibly try the odd green bean or chicken but usually it ends up being spat out. I have tried so many different things and have pretty much given up on all the wonderfully good food I have made in little icecubes as she just turns her head away and closes her mouth. I don't want to force it but she just isn't interested. She was consistently on the 50th centile since birth and has now dropped to the 25th, I can really notice the difference in her weight. She has just started crawling but only for a few days so I doubt that has much bearing. She doesn't have any teeth yet so could that be part of the problem? I took her to a cranial osteopath who can see no reason why she should have a problem physically so he thinks it is just that she isn't really into it.

She slept through the night from 10 weeks (I know - very lucky!) but around the time I started weaning she started waking for feeds and now wakes several times a night, I'm trying to only feed her once so she doesn't get too full, but she obviously isn't getting enough calories through the day. I have also tried breastfeeding her only 3 times in one day to see if she would eat if she was really hungry but it was really upsetting and I just don't want to go down that road, she cried loads and still didn't eat. I am totally knackered from getting up loads every night, sometimes every hour to resettle her.

I have been so frustrated by this and just keep trying 3 meals a day every day and don't let her see me getting frustrated, however now I am starting to worry about her too as she is losing weight.

Anyone else been here? Do you have any stories to raise my spirits? I guess she has to eat sometime doesn't she? She can't be breastfed all her life!!

Thanks - and sorry for the long (and first ever) post!

I started trying to wean my ds at 17 weeks (long story why - medical reason).. anyway, he loved eating for a week, then went off it for the next 3 months. Only just started eating literally a week ago, aged 8 months. He also doesn't have any teeth, and I had a hunch this was something to do with it.

The thing that got him eating was my mil giving him a rice cake whilst babysitting one day. I don't think it was that per se, just that he suddenly felt ready that day - and it wasn't puree or on a spoon.

I was never really worried - I just thought he would eat when he was ready - even if only at 12 months.

He is (was!) also totally bf and has no formula or bottle. If it makes you feel any better, once he decided to eat, he has not refused any food I have offered - he must have eaten about 15 different fruits and vegetables in the last week.

You are not the only one. I don't know what the answers are, because I'm going through this at the moment myself. DS is nearly 11 months, but for the last 6 weeks or so has been eating very little. I started weaning him at 6 months, and after a couple of days of pushing everything out of his mouth with his tongue, would eat pretty much everything I tried giving him (but won't accept finger food). If he refused something one day, he would accept it a couple of days later. At 9 months I switched to giving him formula during the day, and bf at night, and around about the same time he started refusing more of his food. In the past he sometimes had a couple of days where he was off his food, but in the last couple of weeks there have been several days at a time where he would accept nothing at all (not opening his mouth, turning away and getting distressed if I continued). He's also not taking very much formula during the day (but bf well at night). I was tempted to continue bf'ing during the day as well, but I'm going back to work and it would just cause more problems. There is only one thing he will eat, and that is fromage frais pots. I'm divided between letting him have them for three meals a day just to make sure he eats something, and limiting them because of the sugar (have tried normal yoghurt and fruit and he won't eat it). His weight gain has practically come to a halt (0.1 kg in two months), so I'm waiting to hear back from my health visitor as to what else to do.

I'm sorry I can't be more reassuring, and I know how frustrating it is when you're concerned about your child not getting enough nutrients during the day, and also annoying when you've made meals for them and they end up all in the bin (or on the floor!). You kind of end up feeling that it would save time just pouring the ingredients straight into the bin and not bother cooking/pureeing/freezing/heating them in the first place. I'm going to try giving him some jar food, incase it's the texture he's having trouble with (he was eating bits of pasta, rice and small lumps before the problems started), because fromage frais is really smooth, so maybe that's why he likes it? Keep your fingers crossed!

I know exactly how you feel! My dd is breastfed and I have heard that these babies often have more problems with solids than forula-fed. I started weaning at 24 weeks, and it went well for a while until she got a cold and hit 7 months at the same time. Then she refused anything for over a week, and then continued adamantly refusing anything fed to her on a spoon. She did have two bottom teeth at that point, so we started giving her tiny little bits of food (half baby fingernail size) on the end of a finger which she sometimes took, sometimes didn't. Then we worked out that she wanted total independence, and didn't want puree. So we shrugged our shoulders bit our lips and have learned to live with MESS! It took several weeks for her to develop a really effective chewing action, so didn't swallow much to begin with, but now gets quite a bit down her over a longish period of time (she is 9 mo this week). Our strategy is:
(i) to sit her in her walker - she loves it and races around the kitchen - if we put her in the highchair she gets impatient after 10-20 mins. Maybe you could sit her on the floor in the kitchen with the door closed?
(ii) put finger food in front of her (to begin with it was anything that was gummable or melty): rice crackers (e.g. salt free Kallo), soft avocado slices (great super-food!), thin slices soft banana, steamed soft broccoli florette, steamed potato/sweet potato slices...
(iii) give her food stuck on the end of a spoon (we find the Annabel Karmel stage 1 spoons get things to stick on best) e.g. porridge with fruit puree or maple syrup mixed in (great favourite!). Put spoon in front of her and let her do her own thing.
(iv) put a spouted cup with water in front of her so she can sip when thirsty (she stops eating if she is thirsty).
(v) ignore her and let her take as long as she likes (very very painstaking but worth it!). I do the washing up, cook, etc.
She also like sharing with me - recently I discovered she loves ripe plums and if I am eating one I peel it with my teeth and hold it out to her and she pushes her face right up to it to get a good suck/bite!
Good luck, there is hope eventually...!

My 8 month old is also similary disinterested in food although we have been trying to do BLW with her. The main problem is that she is still not keen on sitting, although she can do it. She just prefers to stand, so it makes feeding a bit tricky as she is fidgeting and bouncing around on my lap! However, I find she will eat some food if I have her on my lap while I eat my dinner or lunch and pretend to ignore her while she steals food off my plate! If I put her in the highchair with some finger food, "no way lady, I'm outta here..." but on my lap in a very nonchalant, "goodness me, have you just stolen another piece of broccoli" kind of way, we're getting there

Think Bodkin's tip is a good one - they seem to love to copy you, and will nick food if they think it looks interesting. I think sometimes they pick up on (understandable) tension in a parent who's concerned that they're not eating enough.

Its good to read all other posts to see that I am not the only one who seems to be putting everything in the bin!

My son is 6 and half months and has been bottlefed since he was 6 weeks. I started to ween him 4 months, baby rice etc and he was took to it really well. He would eat all the veggies that I spent hours steaming the blending and all was good.

However, about 6 weeks ago, he decided that he no longer wanted to eat anything apart from fromage frais! Not even his favourite Banana Porridge. If I sit him in his highchair and stand there with a bowl and spoon he immediately starts to cry. I have tried jars of food, homemade food, just add water / milk foods but he wont have it! The only way to get anything into him is to give him a dummy to stop the screaming, quickly take it out and put a spoon in before he realises its not the dummy and then put the dummy back in as he starts to cry. Wait 2 mins and do all over again x 15 ish! I really try not to give in and feed him a fromage frais sometimes thats all I can do to get some food in him!

I know I am meant to be giving him chicken and new foods now he is 6 months but as he isnt even eating the basic foods I dont want to give him new foods. I really am struggling to get him to eat anything apart from yoghurts!

Help! Any Ideas?

sit her on a towel and put food down on the floor. ignore her. repeat daily. she'll find an interest.. don't stress

forget the highchair and purees....honest.

she'll find her way

aitch will be along in a mo....i can feel her vibes

Ludi - egypt's advice is good (I'm also channeling Aitch!) - also just sit him on your lap when you're eating, and see if he swipes stuff. Forget the high chair for a while - it's making you both stressed. Show him how much you're enjoying your food, and see if he wants to copy. It'll be more fun for you, so you will relax, and that will help him relax. See Aitch's blog for lots of tips for starting finger foods www.babyledweaning.com