10.5 month old boob-obsessed and indifferent to solids

[itssquidstella]

Hoping for some advice! DS is 10.5 months and has been eating solids (we've done a mixture of BLW and purées) since he was 5.5 months. He was EBF until then, and night weaned at 7 months.

His appetite for solids has always been really variable and to begin with, I was pretty relaxed about it, but as he gets closer to one it's starting to stress me out.

He's been at nursery for about a month and eats well there because he doesn't have an alternative, but when he's with me he's far more interested in my boobs than in solid food.

I'd always intended to stop breastfeeding after a year, but I’m struggling to see how I'll do it; he's fed on demand and he's VERY demanding! I can't cut individual feeds because we're not on any kind of schedule.

Whilst I’m still breastfeeding him, I don't think he'll start to show more interest in solids: this evening he ate a handful of peas and three blueberries, then threw the rest of his dinner on the floor, but within a couple of minutes of being taken out of his highchair he was pawing at my chest and demanding milk.

As an example, today he's eaten:
Breakfast: Oat cereal with milk, two raspberries, 1/3 of a banana
Snack: one melty stick, one mouthful of banana
Lunch: one Ella's pouch (sweet potato, broccoli, apples and blueberries), a bite of bread, half a chip, one satsuma
Dinner: three blueberries, a handful of peas

He's a healthy boy (91st centile height, 50th weight) and meeting all his milestones, so he's getting the nutrition he needs, but I don't want to keep breastfeeding him into toddlerhood and I don't know how to stop!

Any advice from people who've been in a similar position would be super helpful 😬

My ds2 was worse than this - he ate even less than yours!
I offered at every meal and he would just turn his face away. He just wanted boob.
I tried everything!
Then one day I was eating some salmon and he just picked a piece up and ate it and then carried on eating each meal time.
He was 2 days away from 11 months, so hopefully yours will soon!
He's now a 21 year old 6 ft 2 and almost impossible to stop eating!

@twinkletoesimnot that's reassuring! I’m hoping that DS will be the same, but it's the fact that he does eat okay at nursery that concerns me - he knows HOW to eat, he just isn't interested when he can have boob instead!

I’m wondering now if I'll have to go cold turkey on breastfeeding (I'd hoped to carry on feeding him at bedtime for a while after he turns one), and deal with the resulting tantrums...

I don't actually think that's too bad nor a 10.5 month old.

Have you tried waking him at the same time each day and getting him into some sort of a schedule? Easier said than done though I know

If you are up for it you'll have to stop feeding on demand. They only need about 350-400ml of milk at that age. I would cut down to 3 feeds a day. Eg Wake up, bedtime and after nap. That way when you want to stop you have set feeds to drop. I was literally dreading it, but it was actually a lot easier than I thought. He'll be hungrier for solids so will likely eat more

Those meals don’t sound too bad at all apart from dinner and he might be more tired then.
Carry on offering but don’t start coercing as it can have a massive impact (in a negative way!)

How about switching lunch and dinner? Give the easy pouch in the evening and something more substantial at lunch…could alway save last night’s dinner.
Unless you are always managing to eat together, in which case I’d stay as you are.

The breastfeeding is up to you….I wouldn’t rush to stop unless you are really fed up. Perhaps try and add some more protein to his diet. I would maybe give some vitamin and iron drops too.

@PritiPatelsMaker he's a brilliant sleeper. Bed at 6.45 and sleeps through till 6/6.15. Naps at 9.30ish and 1.30ish.

@Whentwobecomesthree I think I'll have to. Not looking forward to the whining and pulling at my top though!

@Wishona thanks for the response. We're often out over lunch so I sometimes take pouches as they're easy to transport, but he sits at the table and eats breakfast and lunch with us wherever we are. We eat our dinner after he's in bed, which might be why he's less interested in eating his tea. He has vitamin drops once a day so I think we're okay on that front. I agree he should get more protein - he refused a carrot, sweetcorn and cheese croquette at lunchtime and a fish finger was thrown on the floor at tea time, so I am offering it but he's not that keen!

In your shoes I’d try introducing a cup of cows milk when he’s turned one. I think you’ll probably need to cut down in breastfeeding over a period of time rather than stopping all at once. He will still need milk at 12months but at that point it’s ok for it to be full fat cows milk rather than breastmilk or formula. If you want to start cutting down now then I believe if it’s small quantities it’s ok to try cows milk, just to get used to the taste and drinking it from a cup, but if you want to give him full feeds of milk then it needs to be formula.
Your baby’s completely normal by the way. There’s significant variation in how babies split their nutritional needs between milk and preferring milk but eating some food at 10,5 months is nowhere close to the extremes of that scale.

I think we have a skewed idea of how much babies and toddlers should be eating.

I was expecting you to say he ate nothing but a few peas all day! That sounds like a half decent day for my 19 month old and he only gets breastfed before bedtime now. He's small but healthy and chunky. He doesn't eat much. I've let go of any anxiety around it as they sense it and it only compounds the issue.

They know what they want to eat. If he's clearly healthy and happy I would really not worry about this.

Also, mine seems to eat the most at breakfast and lunch and then barely eats at dinner. He's obviously getting what he needs so I try not to worry. It's hard though, I know.

Neither of mine ate that much at 11m. They both became more interested in food around 1 year and dropped breast feeds a lot quite quickly.

Thanks @Aerosarethebest. He has cow's milk on cereal but I hadn't thought about introducing it as a drink yet; I might give it a try.

@Getthefiregoing I think you're right about skewed expectations. I’m constantly reminding DH not to get frustrated when DS only has a few mouthfuls of toast or whatever, but as DS gets older I’ve been expecting him to eat more when maybe he doesn't need to! I’m trying very hard not to show him I’m anxious, but it's good advice. Thanks for your response :)

@HubertTheGoat that's good to know. Maybe he'll lose interest in the boob under his own steam!

Both DSs were like this. I’m afraid I simply carried on feeding on demand until I went back to work and then slowly scaled back, stopping when they were 2. For us the benefits of the comfort when they had the inevitable run of colds etc from the childminder outweighed the odd demand for a feed when it wasn’t the right time. They are 7 and 10 now and healthy boys who eat a pretty decent diet.

I wouldn't withhold breastfeeds or introduce cows milk as a drink until after 1. Main nutrition still comes from BF at your little ones age.

I still BF my now 2y5m old but they just started taking more interest in food about 11m and fed less (on demand) naturally thereafter. It was a quite sudden and sharp drop of BF which came with a big old emotional hormone crash for me so be prepared for that!

But yes agree with po about skewed expectations - sounds like you and your little one are both doing great!

@DelurkingAJ I’m back at work already so four days a week he manages fine on three feeds a day (one in the morning, one after pick up and a comfort feed at bedtim). It's the other three days that he's insatiable!

Thanks @Teapleasemilknosugar yes I’m not looking forward to the hormonal crash - although we'd like to start TTC again fairly soon and I haven't got my period back yet, so it'll have to happen at some point!

@itssquidstella

For some context, here's what my very active 19 month old ate today in amongst a trip to his gran's and an afternoon running about the park:

Breakfast: tiny bowl of Rice Krispies, mostly uneaten. 2 slices of haggis.

Snack: half a peanut butter sandwich, one yoghurt

Lunch: a croissant, a banana, two segments of a satsuma

Dinner: four fish fingers. Cucumber, humous and rice all left uneaten.

Breastfed before bed.

I gave up worrying a long time ago.