Terrified of BLW

[steadyaswego]

My DS is 7mo and last month we started him on solids. He still hasn't really taken to them and more so plays with it And chews on his spoon than actually eats or seems remotely interested in eating anything.

My plan has always been to do BLW, but when it came down to it I was so scared of DS choking I had a small panic attack. I keep trying, steaming the carrots and broccoli etc, but when he gets a bit off in his mouth I freak! Not out loud so as to scare him and risk a choke even more, just internally and then I take it away.

He's tried purées and doesn't seem interested if he cant pick it up with his hands. He will however eat the ready made Ella's but only straight from the pouch into his mouth (I know it's awful!)

Any tips from anyone who's felt similar would be so appreciated!! I don’t want my DS missing out because of my worries 😩

Indeed. Cave dwelling ancestors had full access to food processors and silicon ice cube trays for their American fridge freezers.

BLW has been around forever. In other countries babies eat what their parents eat and it’s completely normal. It’s our Victorian ancestry that makes us treat babies so weirdly. And then the power of commercialism selling pouches and jars and bowls and spoons.

BLW was great for us. Yes, it’s messy but babies learn so much from squishing food. DD has a very varied palette and I’m sure it’s from the variety of tastes and textures introduced early.

OP, might an infant and child first aid course make you less anxious? Choking is rare but if you knew you knew how to deal with it if it happened……?

BLW isn't the be all and end all and I did it with both of my children.
What I will say though is that some people seem to absolutely love the weaning stage. I hated it with both of mine. Even BLW felt faffy, especially during the early stages when they don't eat much it felt like I spent all day either feeding them a bottle or giving them food to try. So much easier just giving them a bottle! It will get better OP.

I think it's so easy to get hung up on following a particular method. For our second child we just literally winged it and did a bit of everything - spoon feeding, purees, solids, letting her eat independently etc. And she took to food much more confidently than our first! The only 'mantra' I've ever followed with it is the whole 'food before one is just for fun' idea. Don't worry if your little one isn't eating anything at this stage, he's getting everything he needs from milk still. Our DS ate essentially nothing until about 18 months (and even then he was delightfully restricted in what he'd eat for a year or so after that!) He's now a ravenous 5 year old eating us out of house and home!

It's so easy to question everything as a mum, but go with whatever works for you OP. X

I just squish up whatever we’re eating so it’s like purée with some small lumps. Then give finger food to play with / suck/gnaw. If it’s making you stressed then stick to soft things. I personally wouldn’t let them suck out the pouch as I don’t think it helps them learn to eat

You are wrong. BLW is suitable from 6 months- check the NHS website.
My 10 month DD has BLW exclusively from 6 months.

@steadyaswego your worries are normal but remember though your baby will gag it's unlikely they will choke. When they do gag you remind them to cough by saying cough cough and making the exaggerated sound. Also be sure to eat with them so they see chewing in real time.

Enjoy your weaning journey whatever you decide.

SR_Nutrition on Instagram is fantastic! She has a blog too. Also look up the difference between choking and gagging - gagging is really common. If his face is red, he's gagging, if it's blue he's choking.

BLW makes my teeth itch. I am an older mum and we did purées from 4-6 months. It worked, my adult children are slim and not fussy. Very open to trying new foods.

Seeing a baby choke on food (my friend did BLW) was horrifying.

People say "in the old days we wouldn't have had purées", yeah but mum would chew a bit and give it to babies.

Do what's best for you.

The name may be new but the concept is as old as time. Before companies like Unilever and coke existed and started peddling jar food babies were being born and fed.
In countries where jar food costs more than a daily wage babies were being fed.

Just because you took a different approach to weaning your baby doesn't mean BLW is some modern development.

OP, your baby will learn to eat whatever method you use. My first had no gag reflex, everything that went in his mouth, he swallowed & it was genuinely terrifying.

We did textured purees/mashed stuff with some melty wafers until he was a bit older.

A baby first aid course also helped.

What wouldn't have helped is people telling me to get a grip, so congrats to those posters for their complete lack of empathy.

Baby will gag & this is very different from choking. I'd recommend you do a paediatric first aid course & hopefully this will at least give you some reassurance that you have the skills if needed. BLW is great, please don't hold your baby back due to your anxieties

please don't hold your baby back due to your anxieties

A variation on 'get a grip'

If you don't like BLW you don't have to do it, it's fine. Just start with smooth purees and move up the chain to lumpier foods.

Millions of babies have been weaned this way and they do not miss out (and I say this as someone who loved BLW). It's fine to parent your own way and not hop on a bandwagon of what is trendy.

We di BLW, it's a bit of a silly term when in reality the baby gets to try everything the rest of the family are eating. Large chunks of fruit such as apple, banana, kiwi, pear etc, which baby can hold in their hand and chomp on. Dc was sucking and gum chewing on lamb cutlets 😂at 7 months (wouldn't touch it today though). I BF mine and the main nutrition comes from milk until they're about 12 months old.

The worst part of BLW is the mess and food waste. All in all BLW worked for us as I felt spoon feeding wasn't for us. We obviously used food pouches at various times too, for example when out and about to make sure they weren't hungry, I didn't let them make a mess in a cafe or at other people's houses.

Even in the old days when babies were weaned much earlier, they'd be happily eating finger foods at 7 months.

If you are worried at all then learn what to do if baby chokes and reading up on the difference between choking and gagging.

My DC2 would never touch purées so it had to be finger foods for her. What made me relax was watching one of those Ambulance type shows where a baby was choking on purées.

I found logic really helped in this stage. The reality is that your baby is far more likely to choke on purée than on a piece of broccoli. Purée is fairly high risk for choking as it bypasses the gag reflux. Large foods like broccoli, banana etc are really low risk.

I found just telling myself this and reminding myself that if they choked I knew what to do meant I could trust them and enjoy their pleasure in exploring food.

It’s fine to give purées and porridge and yoghurt if he’ll accept spoon feeding but if he won’t I think you need to let him have food and keep up the self talk until you believe it.

We did BLW from 6 months. Yes they will gag but that's completely normal.
The only kids I know who choke are the ones who are only fed purées as they don't learn how to eat proper food.

Just do whatever you feel confident with at 7 months old. If that’s progressing up stages of purée just do that - you’ll know when your baby has had enough of being spoon fed and wants to try something different. There is absolutely no evidence to say one type of weaning method is better than the other. We did a style of BLW because DS wouldn’t touch purées and only wanted to self feed. But at 3 years old now you couldn’t tell which of his pals had purées and which had ‘normal’ food straight from the off. I recommend following Charlotte Stirling Reid (Sr_nutrition) on Instagram and/or getting her book ‘how to wean your baby’. Really invaluable.

I'm I was determined to do BLW with my pfb after gagging, coughing, me having my nerves shredded that went out the window.
I've yet to meet a 30 year old that can't eat solids because they had purees as a baby.
I gave up and didn't do it with my next two

Thank you so much everyone for your advice!! So nice to hear a lot of you did BLW with no issues, that really settles my nerves. I'll definitely do an infant first aid course as a few of you suggested, I've done research online for it but I think physically doing it with someone trained will help me relax a bit more. Also just bought SR_Nutritions weaning book, thanks for the suggestion!!

Today is a new day and we'll give it another go

OK, if you want to do it, then the most helpful thing I did for BLW was learn about the difference between gagging and choking and what he function of gagging is.

You can also search e.g. youtube for "BLW baby gagging" and see a video where you know for sure that the baby is fine at the end, and see the whole process through from start to end so that you can see how they handle it. Trying to just calmly watch your own child go through it if it's scaring you that they are in danger is not a good way to do it!

Interestingly they are all different too. DS1 did a bit of gagging, handled it fine. DS2 used to gag very easily and at everything and it would upset him. So I spoon fed him purees until he was happier with lumps. DS3 had barely any gag reflex at all and handled solids like an absolute pro, except that he has no sense of when to stpo shoving food into his mouth (still at 18mo!) and will sit there like a little hamster and then suddenly go red and vomit it all up (or it will just all miraculously disappear and you will wonder physically how).

its a good idea to do first aid course, i've seen some courses for parents. I personally watched a lot of videos and it helped. We started with soft food and slowly added more in as my anxiety eased. she is now 18 months and eats anything and everything. Mess stopped at around 12 months I would say. Personally I would do BLW again, so much easier! but I do understand the anxiety, it took me months not to panic every time she eats!

So my baby is now 11m .. we never did BLW I was too scared and also I did pouches (every single different flavour there is) shoot me.. I didn’t have time… she is not interest in food and when she’s had enough she gags and throws up, everytime
i try make her home made she gags on the texture, I need help!!! She’s almost a year, still wakes up for 2 bottles in the night, I don’t know what to do!

So my baby is now 11m .. we never did BLW I was too scared and also I did pouches (every single different flavour there is) shoot me.. I didn’t have time… she is not interest in food and when she’s had enough she gags and throws up, everytime
i try make her home made she gags on the texture, I need help!!! She’s almost a year, still wakes up for 2 bottles in the night, I don’t know what to do!
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Have to be honest … I didn’t do BLW .. to scared of chocking but I went back to doing home work very early so I have been doing all Ella’s kitchin, I’ve never done proper food… I thought it was good stuff and was the same as making it at home… I’m not stuck that my 11 month old has 10 teeth but gags on everything with lumps , how on earth now do I transition her? Like how did people In the old days do it?

All kids are different. My little one bated pureed veg etc but wolfed down a chilli! Just keep trying whatever you're eating 😊