Anyone regret baby-led weaning?

[RosieLee2019]

We did BLW from the start, but now, at 14 months, DS is still making a huge mess at mealtimes, chucking food and cutlery on the floor, barely eating a lot of the time and constantly trying to climb out if his high chair.

I feel like giving him autonomy at meal times has massively backfired and descended into unwanted behaviour, while all my friends’ traditionally weaned babies seem to eat much better at meal times and make less mess.

Trouble is, we can’t go back now, and we’re just stuck with stressful chaotic meal times (which also makes eating out a nightmare).

Anyone else find this or have advice??

It gets easier. Only give them small amounts and say no and firmly take the food away/put them down/make it boring. It’s just a phase and means they’ll eat pretty much everything later on. Make sure there’s messy play at other times. Purée just has other issues I think and I found more of a choke hazard.

I do sometimes think it is a bit overrated though. Despite all that I wonder if I should try purées next time, just because I agree it can be stressful.

But then a lot of my purée baby friends live of those pouches and are really bad at feeding themselves so who knows.

Thanks for the responses - really interesting to read!

We did the ‘purist’ form of BLW, ie no purées, no spoon-feeding, baby joined in our mealtimes and ate the same meals as us (modified where necessary) from day 1. I followed the book by Gill Rapley, which encourages babies to be allowed to explore and play with food (hence the mess). I guess I just hoped he’d have grown out of the messy phase by now!

One of the benefits of BLW is supposed to be that meal times are less stressful and you can just let baby get on with it. I guess I’m just not experiencing that now, but as PPs have said, that is prob actually more down to my LO’s temperament / personality that the fact we did BLW.

On the plus side, my LO will try pretty much anything, is pretty good with cutlery, but I suppose only time will tell what kind of eater he’ll grown into.

BLW worked really well for us, no regrets. But I did find both of mine went through a stage at around 12-18 months when they messed around and didn't eat properly. What I found worked well was eating more on the go - e.g. playgroup/playground in the morning, sandwich in the buggy on the way home for lunch. Also picnics.

Depends on the child and the parent what works for you. Dd1 was low weight and has bad reflux so she was on purées spoon feed at 4 months (under a paediatrician’s advice), then I had dtds even Dd1 was 3 years old so they just had what Dd1 was eating. They were fab at it but weaned at 6 months, so that bit older, and often popped food in each other’s mouths too. They would sometimes drop stuff but rarely threw it - I’d take it away with a firm no on the occasions they did but that was rare for them. The difference being, watching older dsis eating with them and feeding each other. I would give them little cubes of cheese while I sorted Dd1 and they just got on with it. Different things work for different dc.

Don't regret it as such, but I do think it's a complete nonsense (that admittedly I briefly bought into as a new mum).

It's a load of shite. Just feed your baby.

Your little one will be fine though, I doubt it's done any actual harm. Mealtimes are stressful with most babies this age.

Nah I think it's an amazing idea. But I have a very independent DD who has always wanted to do everything herself! I think there would be mess regardless

I do a mixture of baby led and purées but she spoons herself now.
The twist and shake mats and bowls are expensive but keep the plate on the high chair.
I had to swap to using my travel high chair all the time as she could escape from the normal one.

No regrets at all, in fact weaning was one of the most enjoyable parts at that age with both DCs. They could use a spoon and fork by 12m, and we've had no issues with fussiness except one or two ingredients per child, eg avocado for DD2 and courgette for DD1, that they genuinely didn't like (they still dislike these things). They are 5 and 7yo now, and continue to be 'good eaters' in both quantity and variety.
If food was thrown or pushed onto the floor, I would assume it was unwanted and it wasn't returned. DCs quickly learnt not to do it. The super messy stage didn't last long.

Having done more spoon feeding with my younger two, not because there was anything wrong with BLW, just because I was a bit more inclined to get evangelical about a method when I was younger and stick to it like glue :o - you do get a freer mealtime with a baby when you're in the first stages of BLW. When spoon feeding you can't really eat your food at the same time unless you don't mind eating very slowly and don't need to cut it up or anything complicated like that. So you tend to get into a pattern where the baby eats separately from everyone else. As they get more into using their own cutlery then they eat by themselves so you can eat simultaneously again, but I think we were mostly spoon feeding DS2 until he was at least 18 months if not more like 2. And once the shine of feeding himself wore off, he has not been as interested in eating.

I think my biggest food related regret with any of them is letting them eat in front of the TV. It's such an easy habit to get into and really really hard to undo.

Couldn't stand BLW for the same reasons. Spoon feeding it was and it worked brilliant. Mine are at the toddler stage now and self-feed without fuss.

I didn’t BLW so much as apply some of the principles. I think BLW as a concept is a stupid fad tbh but it’s ubiquitous online so it was difficult not to be influenced by it.

I won’t be doing it this time and will be weaning traditionally from about 4.5-5mo. My first son has food allergies. I don’t think they were caused directly by BLW but I think, given recent research on the topic, it’s irresponsible to allow babies to smear allergens all over their faces and hands with no requirement to actually invest the food. That’s a recipe for food allergies.

DD was BLW she would eat anything !! A bit more fussy now she's older at 9 but she loves sushi , fish , and seafood. Hates Indian curry food but used to eat it when she was younger.