Help needed from more experienced weaners please, 8 month old who is regressing not progressing

[Mellieandmin]

My dd is 8 months old next week and is regressing on her weaning instead of progressing.

History is, started at 6 months with all the usual foods and moved to protein at 7 months. We have had a checked few months as dd had a recurring vomitting bug which now seems to be under control with acidophilus. She is now teething and although I cannot see any more teeth she has had 3 pop up in the last 10 days.

Now, no food will pass her lips apart from Plum baby spinach. I cook, I mush, I pulverize, you name it as if there is even a hint of a lump she gags. She is even going off the spinach dish which used to be her favorite and a real lifesaver.

She is going to Nursery in 2 weeks and I am afraid they will not have the time or energy to cope with a baby that just refuses to open her mouth.

I give her finger foods and she eats them but you can never get enough in when they are so young. She has never been the best eater but has turned into a milk monster! I am trying to cut her down from 5 bottles to 4 by giving a big breakfast but every brand of porrige, rice, etc. is refused.

Please can someone reassure me that things will turn around in time?

Many thanks in advance. fhmm

Here is some reassurance: Things will turn around in time!

My son was weaned from 5 months and was 'a good eater' until 10 months. He then started refusing pretty much everything except for mashed bananas, baby rice/readybrek and milk. He was a major milk monster! I tried and failed to cut back his milk in order to increase his appetite for solids - it just didn't work. Interestingly, this coincided with a major bout of teething. By about 14 months his appetite slowly started to increase again. Although still a fussy eater at 2.10, he eats from all his food groups and I have no worries. Just hang on in there, keep going with the finger foods (this may be quite successful...? Some babies just never really do like mashed up foods...my son still hates 'lumps') and experiment with foods - maybe you'll hit on some dishes he really likes..? And rest assured that at this age, milk is probably giving him most of his nutrients and energy anyway (check with a HV or doctor if you're concerned about weight gain etc, though, obviously).

Thank you loveangelgabriel, so nice to hear that it can happen at any time. HV was quite harsh I felt, she just said to cut back the milk, if dd did not eat then take her out of the high chair and make her wait another 3 hours till the next feed was due. If she cries due to hunger I just have to live with it.

Am wondering if she has children..... maybe I am just too soft but I cannot let her go hungry, she is too little at 8 months.

Good point about the milk and nutrients, I had not thought of it like that.

I am off to bravely hit the shops with step-dd who needs some late pressies...... will check back later but thanks for you help.

Am apalled at your hv's advice. Poor you, poor baby! Tbh I think there is a lot to be said for not over thinking this - your baby likes her milk at the moment - ok well she's getting plenty of good stuff from that. She will eat a little finger food so is experiencing taste and texture - so that's good. Sounds like she doesn't like spoons - ok well that may change or it may not.

When my dd1 went through a fussy phase I really took it to heart - felt that her failure to eat in volume was my failure as a mother. It wasn't. She is now a very healthy 9 and eats everything. You are doing a good job. And you never know - when she goes to nursery she might be totally different with the staff there. Soemtimes seeing other children eat can make a big difference too.

Don't panic. Milk is her main food until she's one, food is just for fun and learning. Don't worry about "how much you can get in her", just put finger foods in front of her, leave her to it and remove what she doesn't eat.

If her mouth is sore she won't want to be fed (and in my experience many babies get fiercely independent about now and refuse being fed anyway!) so just give her things she can eat herself - breadsticks, toast, cheese, fruit, veg, pasta etc.

I bet as her teeth come through she will start eating better, but if you stress in front of her about food and it becomes an issue she will pick up on that.

Oh and nursery will have to make time to deal with her eating, that's what you pay them for! But I bet you when she is sat with other children eating she will eat too

gosh, i think that's really cruel advice from your HV. what's dd like with things like bread crusts? is she just as gaggy?

Hello! Back from shopping and thank you all. I think HV is out of line but was not sure, first baby and all that but I refuse to starve her.

I just feel such a failure, all the other NCT babies in our group eat their parents out of house and home.

I am hoping that she does copy the other babies at Nursery as she is a real parrot with everything else.

She likes crusts of toast, no gagging. Also eats rice cakes, rusks and bread sticks without fuss. I think she just needs to do it herself to be honest. She won't let me touch the water cup and is perfectly able to feed herself water so I guess I should take the lead from that.

Thank you so much everyone, feeling a bit better now.......

mellie this is SUCH a long shot but you're not married to an actor, are you?
and have you seen about BLW, then? have a look at www.babyledweaning.com (my site, ahem) as there are loads of finger food recipes on there that might be useful. sounds like your dd might just be one of those wilful little darlings who likes to feed themselves.

hi mellieandmin

my DD was a poor eater, and actually still is, aged 2.5 , i just had to change my expectations of her. we started doing traditional weaning, then moved onto BLW fairly rapidly.......she enjoyed the independence of feeding herself, and being in control, but did not eat a lot more.

she has a small appetite, and did not get into eating until well after her first birthday

as has been said, milk is the main source of nutrition until 12 months, and as long as she is having plenty, that is great... i also found that my daughter;s eating really deteriorated during and after illness.. still does

she may remain a small eater, but as long as she is developmentally ok and smiling, happy , weeing and pooing, then you have no cause for concern IME .

as i said, a lot of it is down to changing your expectations, comparing to others is often a bad idea when you have a small eater

my mistake was comparing DD to DS who could inhale an entire roast dinner and pudding and seconds of everything, whilst she nibbled daintily on a floret of broccoli and licked a bit of gravy off her fork!!

keep doing what you are doing, and don;t stress too much and make meals a battle ground

babies and toddlers do not starve themselves, they eat when they are hungry and eat enough for their own needs

Hi aitch, no, not married to an actor, married to an artist but I guess you are thinking of another mellie. Famous actor? Anyone nice?

Thanks for the BLW info, just poured myself a nice glass of wine and starting to read.

Thanks Lulamama, I love the licking the gravy thing, that is SO her! She is so bright, I even caught her trying to catch my eye earlier so she could turn her head away when I proffered the spoon! Such a monkey!

She is also a right Artful Dodger, everything in her reach is obviously hers to the point she went to bed tonight with an envelope she had tea-leafed off the kitchen counter. Like I said, such a monkey!

I think you are right, after illness she really seems to suffer. Last sickness was Monday after some cheese macaroni that a friend made. Her daughter ate more that I would then my little dd gagged and spat at hers. Sadly it all came back up over me 2 hours later along with a whole bottle of milk. They do say 2 weeks to heal don't they so here is hoping for Christmas Day!

i shall be thinking of you when my DD eats her pico mouthful of turkey and iota of a sprout on Xmas day

happy holidays

I also wanted to say don't worry. My dd is 7.5 months, refuses to be spoon fed and just helps herself to whatever she wants in front of her and chucks the rest on the floor. Some days she eats a reasonable amount, other days (today) she nibbles a pear and a bit of toast and refuses anything else. She is teething too so I don't blame her, she's probably sore. She is a happy, healthy, 24lb baby who is strong and robust. She is fed milk on demand which is filling any holes left by lack of solids. As others say, food is for fun until 12 months and milk should be the basis of their diets.

Lulamama you make me laugh, such a tonic!!! Speaking of tonic, I am sure I have some bombay saffire around here somewhere....

Thank you showofhands, will keep on with the milk and cover her tray in hand friendly food and smile, I think I have been forgetting that as been so stressed.