am I off my trolley to try to re-wean DS2?

[JingleyJen]

So to explain - I think we missed an important phase of weaning DS1 was textbook - DS2 has suffered with recurrend ear infections and various illnesses that has interupted weaning.

as we got to feed him something other than mush he was very poorley so we carried on with the mush - we have totally stopped that now and he has no blended food at all HOWEVER he has very little that he will eat.

HV suggests that I cut out all bottles of milk ( he is 14 months) and let him get very hungry then he will eat.

Yep she is probably right but I am not prepared to do that.

So I was thinking that in January I would go back a few stages and try weaning him again - start with tastes of different things then add more and more variety very slowly into his diet as if we hadn't started the process at all.

Am I mad? could this work? Please don't tell me to sit it out and that by the time he is 5 we will be through it - I am too impatient for that - but would love to hear other tips that may help.

Your HV's suggestions sounds really harsh. Going back to the beginning again sounds like a good idea. Since he is older maybe try either reducing his number of bottles or maybe water them down?

Good luck

thanks Shanna - he currently has breakfast then 8oz formula we try lunch (not much eaten) then we try dinner (same amount as lunch) then he has 8oz before sleep. Not sure I should cut out either of them - I have stuck with formula rather than moving to cows milk as he really isn't having a balanced diet. Should I water them down?

toddlers need milk, and should have milk, especially if they are not eating brilliantly

illnesses can really set back a child's appetite, i have this with my dd, who is 2.5 and can go days without eating a meal if she is off colour.

offer little amounts of what you know he will eat

also, sneak extra calories in so that every mouthful is jam packed with calories...eg butter & cheese in eggs...

butter on veg

olive oil on pasta etc

don;t force the issue, and praise him for what he does eat.

don;t be exasperated and don;t take it personally....

he will eat enough to keep himself going and he needs his milk too

So camilla do you think I should try going backward a couple of steps first? He doesn't like cheese unless it is in the macaroni cheese sauce that I make and won't eat pasta unless it is totally dry (OMG he is more fussy than I thought now I am writing it down!!!)

x post Fio - I didn't think it felt right to stop the milk.

sorry i assumed he was having loads of bottles- that's how much milk my ds (15mnths) has and he eats well.

I feel so useless - DS1 was textbook easy no hassle never ill - DS2 is lovely but much more complicated!

DD was cr*p at eating. I just stuck with things I knew she would eat for one or 2 of the meals plus snacks (porridge packed with full fat milk, bananas and blueberries is still a favourite) and just put whatever we were eating in front of her for the other meal.

She's still contrary about whether she'll eat but I knew she was at least getting one or two good meals and this approach still mostly works

my dd is a fussy eater just try introducing foods he doesnt like gradually dont make a fuss if he doesnt eat them he will notice this and do it more often!

my dd hated mushrooms but we just kept putting them on her plate and occasionally saying things like why dont you try a mushroom now? and if she said no we would say nothing now they are one of her favourite foods

it takes at least three separate tastes for a baby to become used to a new taste! babies and eating is a big thing in my house my dd1 age 4 is underweight and have just been told dd2 6 months is eating too much so as far as hv's go i feel that you cant do right for doing wrong!

do what you feel is right for you are you ds you are his mum you know best!

another trick is blending foods into sauces my dd hates onion and tomatos but loves the tomato sauce she has on her burgers and has yet to notice that it is just onion and tomatos blended up!! is the taste he doesnt like or that he can see what it is?

I admire your patience - as a family so much of our family life is spent sharing food together that I just can't cope with it being a battle ground each time.

Man can not live on breadsticks alone! (surely not!)

then dont let it be a battle ground just ignore it i hav egiven on trying to get my dd1 to eat i just put food on her plate if she eats it great if not then she doesnt! it will drive you insane otherwise i know it did with me when she was younger!! she is stilla very poor eater and tends to like only one food at a time! at the moment it is cheese and pasta last month it was pancakes! just go with it! your dd wont allow himself to starve to death!

i learned with my dd1 the more fuss you make they more fuss they will make! at one point i used be crawling round the floor with spoonfulls of food begging her to eat them while she was running riot and finding the whole thing rather amusing!! it would ultimatley end in us both being in tears! now i have dd2 i simply dont have the time for that and things are slowly getting better!

kids will do anything for attention dont make food an issue he will eat what he needs to even if does seem to you like it is not enough!

My DD now 13 months - got the same advice from my HV to stop BFing completely and go cold turkey to get her to eat solids. My DD also stops eating when she gets ill for weeks afterwards. And often just when she is increasing her range of foods she gets ill again. Its really, really hard throwing so much food away and worrying so much.

My DD won't eat much other than fruit (all types of only raw fruit from figs to pomengranates) and pasta with smooth sauces only. I hide as much into her pasta sauces as possible but her main love is pesto.

I also leave some food out on her little table in the play area so when she is playing and often when she watches telly (30mins per day I promise) then she will often nibble. Popcorn (make a tonne of popcorn for about £1) is a great favourite.

She loves spearing food with her fork - will eat more food that way. you could try that.

Tapster - Thanks for that - it is good to know I am not alone!
I thought we had a break through last week when he was determined to feed himslef with the spoon. However it doesn't go anywhere near his mouth - he balances it and squashes it but it doesn't go into his mouth. Hurumph!!

let him lead the way, maybe offer finger foods, and see how he gets on.....let him pick up and explore the food, and if some goes in, then great, if not, then he';ll do it in time. eat together as much as you can, mealtimes not just about food, but being together, talking and spending time together

Camilla I think that is one of the main pressure points - we are very much a family based round the kitchen table sharing food together at the moment he sits in his highchair with us whilst we eat and the food goes cold in front of him he drinks well and would eat breadsticks / rice cakes all the time but if you dunk the breadsticks he refuses them if you put something onthe rice cakes he refuses them..

Anyway - I will keep trying and try not to get stressy about it. Thanks all