i hate weaning....am i doing it all wrong?

[wizadora]

my dd is 9m3weeks and still drinks alot of milk.she seems v fussy with what she eats and when she eats it isnt alot.i find myslef giving her baby cereal every day because she doesnt seem to want anything else and i give it because i want her to eat something.for lunch she has some homemade veg or something sometimes a jar.naughty me but again i give jars alot because she doesnt seem to want anything else.i try to compensate with giving her alot of fresh fruit which she tends to eat alot of mainly strawberries and pineapple.she eats the danone baby fromage frais.cant get petit filous here as live in Spain.have tried greek yog and again not too keen.she will eat toast etc but most of the finger foods i give her like veg etc she doesnt even put near her mouth she will just chuck straight on the floor for the dog to wolf down.grr.
thing is she will play on the floor and try and pick up bits of fluff and eat them or she will quite happily devour a prawn cracker at the chinese.bad again i know but i really am despairing.can anyone help? so i try and give her 3 meals a day, brekkie,lunch and dinner.oh this all makes me so why cant she scoff her food like eveyone elses babs seem to...

I hated weaning too! My dd refused to eat anything. If i got 3 mouthfuls in her it was cause for celebration. After stopping and starting weaning 3 times i decided to go the blw route, which worked up to a point cos i was reassured by the "until they are one it's just for fun" mantra, and meant i wasnt sat there getting frustrated by trying to put a spoon in her mouth. But i still couldn't help myself getting worried by how little she was eating, especially as her birthday drew closer. 2 weeks after her birthday she was still not eating much and i began to worry a little more. Then she suddenly seemed to get a slight appetite. Now a typical days food is as follows (although obviously i do try and give her a varied diet not just the same foods every day!)
breakfast
a handful of cheerios or shreddies
lunch
a sandwich or toast (1 slice of bread) followed by fruit
dinner
pasta with peas and chicken.

She will usually now eat most of what i give her but they are tiny portions and its still difficult getting leafy veg or meat into her. If she asks for snacks during the day i'll give them to her as i'm just happy to see her eating anything!

i think that leafy veg must be difficult until they have molars, tbh, clairey. dd can't eat lettuce at 18 months, becuase it's something that definitely needs to be chewed i reckon. think about how you eat a bit of rocket or someting yourself, also our herbivorous chums the cows wear their teeth down chewing grass.
as for the meat, i found that when dd got her pincer grip she stopped liking the big pieces and preferred me to cut them up for her so she could pop the whole lot in. anyway, as you can see i like to think about this stuf... hth

i was childminding a child who, when she came to me they were having problems with them eating as she would clamp her mouth shut,shake her head and refuse to eat..she was being spoonfed..she was 10 months when she started. anyway i just put the food on her tray and left her to it/ ignored her while i and my other children were eating and even didnt put any food in front of her whilst we all tucked into theirs..lets just say that curiosity got the better of her and she would start watching everyone else and then start pointing to her food, which i casually put in front of her and didnt pay any attention and she now wolfs her food dont and eats more with me than her parents still!! but at least eats everything i offer her but i always give her , her bowl last so she sees everyone else eating first plus she loves feeding herself and i give her everything that we are all eating, in the last month she has started wolfing down huge bowls of fruit and wouldnt even comtemplate eating any fruit before..the trick is to be totally laid back and not worry..ive always been like that with all the children ive either looked after or my own and my dd [6yrs] has the most amazing appetite and loves everything and i always left it up to her to decide whether she wanted to eat and what when she wanted..some days she would only eat huge amounts of carbs or other days she would eat only meat and others just veg or fruit but by the end of the week she would have covered all the dietary needs..basically chill out and try and eat around others so she can see others eating too and even leave nibbles around in little bowls if you want and she can help herself..its all about independence...sorry ..i do know how frustrating it can be....

well lookit that... bambi's a natural BLWer.

For what it's worth, my DS (7 mths) is rubbish at eating bland boring 'baby' food, like tasteless chicken casseroles and endless mushed root veg. He LOVES proper grown up food though, and surprises me with the strong flavours he will eat. You have to be careful with the salt content in some things, but he loves pasta with pesto, mature cheddar etc, and much prefers things like mango or quite sharp oranges to pear or boring baby rice

whats BLW?

Baby Led Weaning. There's loads of info on it in the Weaning section of this site, so have a look!!!

Hi again, c on from the carrying on from the other day ( 8 month old wont eat still bfing) is that i dont really want to increase the Bfing, still want to carry it on but want him to eat more rather than increasing number and length of breast feeds which was the case at about 7months, where he was actually waking in the night more than when he was new born. Presently i bf 4/5 times between 6am and 7.30pm then a dream feed around 10/11pm plus feed at 4/5am is this normal for bfing babies? i only got to 6months with ds1.

Sorry about the extra letters/ words woops

I think while ideally you don't want him to cut back on the milk to take solids, I think sometimes you do have to cut it a bit to give them an appetite for food.

I had to with my ds - he is now formula fed as I am back at work (why do I feel I always have to justify that...... ) but prior to weaning he was on 40 oz a day - a LOT!!!! Now I give him half his milk feed, then about 20 mins later offer solids, followed by a top up of milk again afterwards if he wants it.

This has stopped him cutting back on his milk too much - he still has more than the recommended 20 oz a day - but has given him an appetite for solids. I know you're breast feeding but could you try something similar?? One boob before solids and the other after?

Also, it took him a while to figure out that eating solids stopped him feeling hungry, IYSWIM. If he was properly hungry he was only interested in the bottle, and would yell if I offered solids at that point ( he doesn't any more as he's worked it out and happily yells for his solids now......!!)

I would also try more finger food as some hate being fed from a spoon. My ds loves sucking on segments of orange, and happily eats mango, cucumber, banana etc. It didn't happen immediately, but keep offering it to him, helping him to pick bits up if they are very slippery, and I'm sure he'll get the hang of it.

HTH

Hi and thanks jo, i agree that he shouldnt cut back on milk too much as it should still be his main source of nutrition it would also reduce my milk supply, which i really had to work at and seeing as i go back to work in 3 months i want to keep it high as poss, as im sure it will reduce a bit once im not with him all day . i suppose its just that he is a very small baby on the lowest centile and its only cause i try stuffing food in him every chance i get that he is keeping on his growth curve as it is. Also dh is getting quite annoyed with the fact he is still in our room, but i dont see the point of moving him out knowing come 4/ 5 am he needs a feed then goes back to sleep straight after. Just means waking up fully just to feed him, whereas at mo im sort of feeding half asleep .

Also just to get back to point he doesnt want solids whether i breast feed just before or not, just has random days where he will/ wont eat, mainly wont!

Just to add that my DD nearly 8 months exactly the same no breakfast (never really ever eats any) and no lunch today - not unusual. She is down to 3 BFs feeds during the day and 2 at night. But she is still 91st percentile - she must get alot of milk from those feeds, but as a result get no sympathy from others as she is so big, sick of seeing my food down the sink or in the bin. off to waitrose to buy more food that won't pass her lips...

What a relief to read this post. My DS is 11 months old and weaning has been a complete nightmare! He loves blueberries, breadsticks, yoghurt and not much else. He will eat stuff from jars - but not keen on anything 'real' that we make for him or he has off our plates. I am so relieved to read that he's not the only one. He weighs (just) the right amount for his age - but increasing the amount he takes in (especially protein) is proving really really hard. He's just started nursery so am hoping that peer pressure will make him copy the other's healthy eating habits! I've also just got a copy of Annabel Karmel's book - which at least has some yummy sounding things for him to try (and probably ignore). I know exactly what one of the MNers said about getting out of your comfort zone - I need to leave food in front of him and not be afraid to let him get on with it (or not). Can't believe I used to worry about how much milk he was drinking...!

Hi all, Met a mum in the wacky and her child ate everything i was green but she was so nice i had to stop myself from shaking her in jealousy! Anyhow ds2 is doing ok, stll getting through to approx 5am despite not eating much so i will be interested to see what he is doing weight wise next time i get a chance to get up to the clinic. On another note dont think bfing alone is getting my weight down now, actually put on three ponds this week, was a shock as have either lost or stayed same (at weekly weigh)since he was born argh will have to visit gym.

I never lost weight bf-ing either. Weirdly, I lost some when I stopped - not nearly enough though!!!!