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Weaning

Find weaning advice from other Mumsnetters on our Weaning forum. Use our child development calendar for more information.

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Original poster

Nearly 12 months and doesn't really eat still

17 replies

SarahOxon · 31/01/2007 21:04

HELP! My DS has been a nightmare since I started weaning him at 5 months. He always refused to eat solids. At 9 months thought we'd cracked it for four brief weeks when he seemed to eat anything we gave him. Then overnight he stopped. Since then he has decided he will eat a) bread b) weetabix c) yoghurt d) cheese and that really is it. He eats his breakfast happily every day and from that point on won't tolerate anyone coming near him with a spoon. BLW is hopeless unless he has some bread and/or cheese to eat of course. Everything else is untouched or goes flying.

I am really starting to go round the bend. He is of course starving from 11am onwards and grumbling for milk. I spend my day in an ongoing battle not to give in to him and to try and get him to eat. This sounds like he's under pressure from me but he's as happy as can be! But I just wonder how long this can really go on before I should start to worry about his vitamin intake etc.

PS We've tried all the eating together/good things come from spoons lark - it hasn't made any difference.

OP posts:

Practicalpet · 31/01/2007 21:21

If you eat in front of him and he is not eating does he want food from your plate at all?

aviatrix · 31/01/2007 21:23

This reply has been deleted

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AitchTwoOh · 01/02/2007 01:29

but it really does sound like he's under pressure from you... you're 'going round the bend' and you're engaged in 'a battle'. why can't he just have the milk? has he been ill? did the glands in his throat swell up, maybe it was sore to eat for a while? was he cutting a tooth?

i know this sounds a bit picky, but for the record you can't really say that BLW has been a disaster because if you were doing BLW then you'd just be sitting this bit out and not trying to be spoon feeding him. he might only like a limited range of finger food, but that is just not the same thing as trusting your child to lead his own weaning off milk and onto solid food. BLW is as much a philosophy of non-interference as it is about finger food, which i think is something that keeps getting lost.

i understand your anxiety, by the way, my own daughter is one now and it's a leap to suddenly find yourself thinking about vitamins etc. for example, she's been cutting teeth recently so her solids intake has gone way down, but i know from experience that will turn around.

from what you say i do find it hard to believe that he isn't feeling some pressure from you, can't you back off for a week and just give him a selection of things that includes his favourites? there's not much wrong with bread and cheese, really, so long as it's not too salty. and yoghurt is great for calcium and i don't know much about weetabix but it might have added vits. i'd leave him be, for the moment. then maybe try fruit in the yoghurt and see how you get on.

Original poster

SarahOxon · 01/02/2007 12:13

I promise I'm not stressing him AitchTwoOh!. I have an older DS and have been through weaning before. Ignore my semantics - it was late! I am actually v laid back and meal times are always fun. DS is a very happy little chap. I guess I am getting pressure from HV because a) he still wakes twice a night for a bottle b) he's been on far too much milk for his age. We've been trying to cut back but since he's not eating... it's a vicious circle.

My worry is that I just don't see an improvement. I agree I am not following the BLW 'philosophy' per se. What I mean is that finger food is not much more successful than spoon feeding. I guess I posted because I wanted views on how long I let this go on for before I really ought to worry about his food intake.

OP posts:

wesey74 · 01/02/2007 12:27

My daughter gave up spoon feeding at about 8 mths and used to go crazy if you came near her with a spoon - scream, clamp her mouth shut etc etc I worried about vitamins and didnt really know what to do. In the end I pursued finger food which worked although at 8 months with 6 teeth this was a bit limited but she got enough and has always been healthy.
Tips- Pieces of boneless fish poached in milk, slices of new potatoes and broccoli, all worked - at one stage this was an almost daily meal. I also then started to make the usual Annabel Karmel stuff and make it a bit lumnpier and let her eat with her hands - messy but worked.
Now she is a healthy 17 month old who is probably a bit more advanced than her peers-who still like to be spoon-fed sometimes-and eats virtually anything either with her fingers or holding her own fork or spoon.

Believe me I know it's frustrating when other babies open their mouths like birds for the spoon but it all worked out in the end! I remember it well...

AitchTwoOh · 01/02/2007 15:01

aye well, probably dd is on 'far too much' milk for her age according to your HV too. according to annabel karmel she should be on just two bottles a day... i think that's bollocks, though, so if she wants milk she can have it.

i reckon she has between three and four bottles in 24 hours. some formula and some cow's milk. she's also started waking again in the night, but that's definitely her teeth as she goes back down after some medised. (i do give her a bottle then as well, i don't know if that's because she needs it or i need the extra sleep...) she also eats an impressive breakfast, not so much lunch and generally a good tea. she'll change the food/milk balance when she's ready, i think. i'm also not busting a gut to get her off the bottle. she drinks water from a glass and doesn't like milk from anything other than a bottle. again, i dont care. if it's comfort sucking she wants, she can have it.

sometimes i think it means i'm a shit mother but tbh i just don't care about this stuff so long as she's healthy and happy... i went through too much stress trying to bf her and getting her weighed etc. i've now gone rather in the opposite direction.

CanStarveWillStarve · 01/02/2007 21:50

Hi Sarah - I could have written this post myself a few weeks ago - in fact I pretty much did, but we've made tonnes of progress since - have a read of my thread here to see - it covers a few more moans as well, but most of the thread focuses on the eating problem.

My top piece of advice would be to hold off on the milk - if you keep giving in then he will keep behaving this way, as he knows what the end result will be. It won't do him any harm to go without for even a day or two, though I'd be very surprised if it took that long.

(Aitch - thought you might like to know that dd only had 2 bfs today - progress or what?!)

AitchTwoOh · 01/02/2007 22:39

wow, that is good news csws. although i note that your advice completely contradicts mine, LOL! there is a new post on the blog for you, by the way.

CanStarveWillStarve · 01/02/2007 22:57

Well it's always good to give the OP a choice .

Just had a read . If I had ever got round to working out how to post on it I would suggest to those with no cooking time that they invest in a slow cooker and prep the night before - perhaps you could mention it on my behalf!

AitchTwoOh · 01/02/2007 23:07

why is it difficult to post? can't you just press 'add comment' at the bottom of the post? i don't get to see all that stuff cos it's my site.

CanStarveWillStarve · 01/02/2007 23:13

I don't know - see previous comment about not having worked out how - might be easy, might be hard . Do I not have to register and log in?

AitchTwoOh · 01/02/2007 23:54

no, you definitely don't have to register... i remember pressing that button.

BikeBug · 02/02/2007 10:07

Just a bit of general sympathy from me: could have pretty much written the same post as the OP, so you are not alone in this. DS is 11 months and eats virtually nothing, swipes food away or throws it on the floor, wants far more bfs than I actually give him (he's at nursery 3 days, so no chance of a bf in the day there!) and has gone from 91st weight centile down to 50th. I try not to stress, but keep thinking 'maybe he'd sleep if only he would eat'.... Have the added problem that he seems to be wheat intolerant, so my basic diet of toast and pasta (not on the same plate) is out, and I am veggie, so really struggle for wheat-free finger foods for him... I haven't been able to figure out any ways of getting him to eat more, and am really at friends wonder-babies who both eat and sleep. ((((hugs)))) to you, and hope things improve soon. I think they just do this, as everything else, in their own good time.

AitchTwoOh · 02/02/2007 10:09

bikebug, on the www.babyledweaning blog there are quite a few good gram flour recipes, things like chickpea burgers, potato scones, bhajis etc. but you probably know them already...

BikeBug · 02/02/2007 12:38

thanks Aitch, I've had a look before (and a grand blog it is too) but must revisit - bought the gram flour and everything, but caved in and started using 'gluten free' Hipp jars cos it was so easy. Or would be, if he would eat the contents! Time to start cooking I think - I manage to cook for me and DH from scratch every day, feel very mean giving poor DS jars, jars, jars and don't really blame him for refusing them...

Original poster

SarahOxon · 02/02/2007 13:36

Thanks all. Will try some alt finger food. Like BikeBug though, I'm a veggie and so I tend to give him veg finger food which he dislikes intensely. Good to know I'm not alone!!

OP posts:

AitchTwoOh · 02/02/2007 14:53

bloody hippies.

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