8.5month old refusing all solids

[karenski]

Hi,I started weaning DD at exactly 6 months, she is now 8.5 months. In all this time she has steadfastly refusing any form of solids, I have tried purée (from a spoon, dabbed on her lips using my fingers, and plonked on a tray for her to dip fingers in ) and finger food. She will pick up the finger food, looks at it carefully, and throw it all on the floor. Spoons make her cross. Dabbing food on her lips work the first couple of times - at least she licked it off and looked thoughtful - but now it also makes her cross. I also cannot get near her with any form of medicine or teething gel, and she refuses a bottle or cup. Basically, nothing is allowed anywhere near her mouth.

My DH gets the same reaction as does the v experienced childminder who has had her for a couple of settling in sessions. I am getting more and more stressed about this because I am due to start back at work in just over a week, I don't know how she will cope with no food or drink from 8am to 6pm. People say she will eat when she is hungry enough but she just seems not to make the connection between hungry = eat food or drink from a bottle. As far as she is concerned only bf will do.

I have talked to the health visitors who advised all the standard stuff -eat with her, try sweet foods, etc which I am already doing, I am due to go back soon (they said they will come out to the house to advise if still no luck, i am not quite sure what they will do though!)

Sorry this is a bit long but she is doing my head in - oh yes and she has gone from 50th centile at birth, 25th at 6 months, down to roughly the 15th or so. Any ideas anyone? Thanks for reading this far!

Oh yes, at one point the hv though she might have reflux, but my Gp thought not. She is usually fairly content but does have the odd green nappy which smells a bit vinegary, and she can be a litlle bit sicky. Could this be a digestion problem?

I don't have the answer except to say my daughter didn't eat until 12 months and then it "clicked" and now at 2 yr she eats fine.

As you say, she didn't make the connection between hunger and food!

Rest assured your DD won't get to 18 yr without eating...it will happen and 8m is still so young.

Thanks that's reassuring - I shall try and be patient! Did you just keep trying at every meal or back off for a bit? I am planning to give up on spoon feeding because it just winds her up, and offer her a bit of my food on a tray at each meal and wait for the lightbulb moment!

yes we still offered at every meal. pre loaded spoons of yoghurt were all she ate for ages i remember that! then she progressed to gumming and chewing...but spitting not swallowing!

My dd was a persistent spoon and bottle refuser. We gave up on both pretty quickly, realised after a few days that the spoon was never going to work and just giving her what we were eating was the way to go.

I know its hard but try not to stress or coax her to eat. Just keep offering and leave it upto her if she picks it up and eats. My dd didnt get the connection between eating solids and satisfying hunger until she was over 12 months, what she is doing is perfectly normal, though frustrating

Does it have to be a bottle too? Have uou read alternative feeding methods? I started my dd with an open cup of milk in the bath so that spills didnt matter. You might like this article too.

As for her weight gain, have you spoken to a BFC about it? I'm not trained, so it could be perfectly normal but if were me I'd ring one of the helplines or go to a bfing clinic and talk to a BFC. Have you got the helpline numbers?

And try not to worry too much about work. You can give her a big feed before she goes, one when you pick her up and one before bed. Just make sure you give yourself time in the morning for one or two big feeds, breast compressions might help to speed things up

Is the cm providing her own food? Does she have other mindees? You might find she succumbs to peer pressure soon enough

Thanks this is v helpful. CM does not provide food, but I also have DS aged 3, so will just pack a bit extra for his meals and she can share that. Other mindees are older, the next youngest is about 18m, but hopefully they will inspire her.
I left her with DH today and they managed 1oz from a bottle, this is good going by her standards. Will look into other methods as well.
Thanks again, it's very reassuring to hear of similar babies, I shall try and chill out a bit more!

Glad you are able to relax a little about it all. Dd was a bottle and spoon refuser like I said, I went back to work at 9 months and she has survived

I could have written your post, except that my DD (8 months) will allow some foods in her mouth, she just won't swallow (and goes as far as making herself sick if food dares to go to the back of her mouth!)

I don't have any solutions I'm afraid. I go back to work in 2 months & so I understand your concern. I hope things change quickly for you.

Ah i have just started a new thread unnecessarily basically saying the same thing. My lo is younger but i started weaning early and was expecting everything to go really well so its made me really anxious! These responses are great and v reassuring!

Thanks speckyB. Had a settling in session at CM today which did not go too well, so am really hoping she sorts herself out soon!

Both mine have been/are being slow in the food front and didn't do bottles. I agree with others that 12month is about when it clicked for dc1 and it looks like that will be the case for dc2 as well.
I know that doesn't solve your immediate problem though. Dc2 seems to do ok with being helped to use an open cup rather than beaker or bottle. Have you tried that? Maybe with water first and then breast milk? There isn't a lot else you can do if you have tried feeding and self feeding. I do think it's worth persevering at every meal though as at some point soon it will click!