My baby's lost his eating mojo, how do I help him get it back?

[CeilingThomas]

Hello, my DS is nearly 10months old and up to about a week ago was eating and sleeping pretty well. He'd have a variety of different foods and eat three meals a day plus about 24-26oz of milk and 4/5 nights out of 7 he'd sleep through. If he did wake he'd just need a quick cuddle to get him back to sleep.

Since new year he's has had a nasty cold and went right off his food just having oodles of milk for 2-3 days and his napping and sleep were all over the place.

He's getting over the cold (still has stuffy nose and cough) but has suddenly become really fussy about food when I've tried to reintroduce it. I manage to get a few mouthfuls of breakfast in and at lunch a few pieces of cheese on toast but other than that all he seems to want to eat is broccoli and cauliflower which aren't filling him up and he's waking once or twice a night for milk which I think is exacerbating the problem as he's not hungry when he wakes in the morning. Not to mention he's not getting adequate nutrition from just these foods.

He doesn't have any teeth yet (although there are white buds on his lower gums, they've been there for weeks now).

I guess my questions to you wonderfully wise people are:

1-should I be worried that he's drinking 30+ ounces of milk a day in favour of food or just go with it til he's ready?
2-in your experience is this response to a cold/teething normal and will it pass?
3-how do I help him get back into the habit of eating food rather than milk? And broaden the variety.

Many thanks in advance!

We went through similar at nine months and I worried about it lots! It passed and DS is now two and eats anything and everything.

My mum said no child is going to choose to starve himself and suggested in took the lead from DS a bit more.

So i started to offer him 'snacks' of things I'd give at meal times, so tofu (we're veggie), cheese, eggs, veg sticks etc in a bowl on the go. I was mindful I didn't want to turn meal times into an issue, despite the fact I found it stressful.

It was a phase and it passed for us. I hope the same is true for you.

Thanks KittieCat, I too am worried about meal times becoming an issue, he does seem to get agitated quite quickly in his high chair once he's had enough. Using a toy I can usually distract him enough to get a couple of spoonfuls in. He hates being fed so it's been finger foods for him since he was around 7 months. I don't want distraction to be the norm though as I want him to know what he's eating and do it willingly!

I'm relieved to hear things worked out for you, I'll try to chill out a bit and follow his lead.

Thanks again!

IME they go through phases... The illness obviously hasn't helped but I'm positive his appetite will pick up again.

Some very good advice on here already. Just wanted to say that the sleep might be nothing to do with the cold or what he is eating, it might simply be the 9 month sleep regression. Try googling ask moxie 9 month sleep regression and are you signed up for the wonder weeks emails or have you got the wonder weeks book? It usually tells you what's going on and when to expect these little regressions.

If you want to reduce his milk in favour of solids, and don't forget the old saying, food is for fun until you are one, could you put an ounce less in his bottle? Would giving him his milk after solids work? Could you give us a typical day, ie when he wakes an naps and when he has milk and you offer solids?

I'd also ditch the distraction. You don't want to give him extra attention for refusing food

Have you read My Child Won't Eat by Carlos Gonzalez? It was out of print when my dd was being fussy but is back in print now and meant to be very good.

Thanks so much jilted, I'll check out those books/sites they sound very interesting. A typical day goes like this:

7am wake up nappy change and down for breakfast of ready brek and strawberries made with about 1-2 oz formula. He used to inhale this! Now refuses it, so I try him with stuff he pick up himself.
7.20ish, once he's done with solids I give him the rest if the bottle, usually about 5-6oz.
8.30ish nap for 1.5 give or take 15min
11-1130ish lunch, of cheese on toast or chicken and avocado or fruit and yogurt
After lunch he is offered another 7oz usually takes around 5-6
1.00ish afternoon nap for 1hr-1.25hrs
3pm offered 7oz bottle- normally drains this. I am starting to offer a snack before bottle but he's not keen at the moment
4.30-5pm tea of pasta and sauce or cassarole broccoli cauliflower, fruit, yoghurt or whatever he'll eat!
6.30 final bottle before bed of around 7oz.
7pm normally fast asleep

I offer him sips if water throughout the day too.

Can you see room for improvement anywhere?
Thanks so much for taking the time to reply!

Should also add I do change his nappy whenever needed, not just in the morning!!

What's he's doing at the moment in the absence if food is having an extra bottle or two in the night (11ish then another around 4am ish) and milk mid morning and the afternoon bottle an hour or so earlier. I offer food when he asks for milk but he refuses and cries until he gets a bottle.

Hope this enough info, i'm at a christening today so will be on and off mumsnet! Will be back later this afternoon.

Your routine sounds good. Doesn't seem likely he's too tired at mealtimes or anything. I would definitely resolve to take a step back from the situation (easy to say, I know...) and let him lead you. I agree about dropping the distraction and I would even not put him in the high chair if he can sit elsewhere. DS also took against his high chair for a while.

I have always valued proper mealtimes and was anxious about forming habits by 'giving in' to DS but I soon realised that it was only a battle of wills because I was making it thus.

Try to go with the flow as I would put money on this being a phase. It will pass.

Also, yes, yes to sleep regression... It was a tough one for us but we got through it and DS now eats like a horse, sits in his highchair and sleeps through the night. Small victories!

Good luck.

Thanks KittieCat, I take heart from your experiences! I'll just keep going and let him work through it at his own pace. Xx

Thought I'd let you know this morning he had a lie in til 8 (!) but then ate more breakfast than he has done in ages. Perhaps my demeanour was playing more of a part than I realised. I chatted and laughed with him and generally relaxed a bit more so he probably picked up on that. Only one meal but we'll see how lunch goes...

My dd is exactly the same at the minute. She takes maximum 21oz milk per day and once was good at eating but now refusing anything more than a few sp

OopS.. Spoonfuls at each meal, won't touch finger foods either. It's driving me mad at the minute. Really hoping its a phase and she's back to herself again soon.

CT that is good news. Nyan a few spoonfuls is probably all she needs, she is drinking enough formula and don't forget, food is for fun until you are one. Try to relax, don't stress if she's not eating as much as you'd like, her tummy will be very tiny and try to enjoy mealtimes together

Excellent! Long may it continue.

Sorry, my comment was to Thomas.

Nyancat I agree with JJJ, remember the old MN maxim: it's a phase and it will pass.

So lunch and tea weren't so successful but still better than the last few days. I just kept smiling and cleared away once he'd had enough, even though he normally eats more. He's been chomping in his hand loads this afternoon, I hope this tooth comes through soon, poor little mite.
Nyan, hope things improve for you too, it is a worry isn't it, but it will pass!!!

How's he been today CT?

MUCH better thanks JJJ! There are a number of concurrent issues here: 1. The cold, causing loss of apatite, need for more milk etc 2. Dropping a nap 3. Teething.

Because he was refusing solids i went back to purees with great succes today. easy on his gums and possible sore throat.

To address drinking loads of milk in favour of food then waking up hungry: After his 11.00-11.30 lunch i thought i'd wait to see if he asked for milk. I offered water of course which he drank but he didnt want milk until around 1pm just before his nap. I upped it to 8 oz to ensure he was still getting enough over the course if the day and he slept for nearly 2 hrs! (unheard of, he's been a serial cat napper since birth). On waking i offered more water and snacks which he took but didn't ask for milk. Then at tea time (around 4.30) he was hungry enough to eat more purees and water, then had another 9 oz milk just before bed.

In summary, reducing the number of milk feeds to 3 but upping to 8 oz each has meant he gets enough milk but he's hungry around meal times. I think before, he was full after 3pm milk and didn't want tea at 4.30. Then wasn't full enough to last the night.

I don't want to jinx anything but he went down at 6.45 ish, and for the first time in weeks, hasn't woken yet!!!

He also seemed happier today, possibly because he wasn't as full in the afternoon, possibly because he's feeling better after the cold. Who knows, they are often such a mystery!

We'll see if tomorrow follows a similar pattern. Thanks for your support JJJ, I've ordered the wonder weeks book and have checked out the sites you suggested. Very helpful indeed.

That is such good news, its actually brought a tear to my eye

Aarrh, bless you!

He woke at around 11.30 with a coming fit which caused him to be sick but after a change if clothes and a resettle, he slept until 8.15 this morning! Usually wakes around 7, so much have been tired. But aside from the coughing he slept through!

Hopefully we'll have similar success today!

Apologies for all the typos above! Hope you are to get the gist of my post!