BF baby won't take bottle & wakes loads in night now needs weaning. Help!!!

[WoodyJen]

My baby is 5.5 weeks old and refuses to take a bottle. He took one (of expressed milk) a couple of times about six weeks, then we didn't try for a week and he obv lost the habit as since then, he screams and screams if we try to give him one. I've tried everything (diff bottles incl NUK and Breastflow; diff teats; diff flows; diff times of day; when he is/isn't hungry; husband trying to feed him with me upstairs; sippy cups instead of bottles; etc). I love breastfeeding, but as he's a hungry boy and needs food at least every 3 hours, it means I have no time to myself.

To make things worse, he wakes LOADS in the night. He goes down (after being fed to sleep or nearly to sleep) about 8pm till midnight (if we're lucky), then wakes every two hours. We can sometimes get him to cry out the first waking, usually about 1.30 am, but after that, only food will settle him back to sleep. And that means breastfeeding. So, I haven't had more than 3 hours sleep in a row for months - and most of the time it's not more than 2 hours in a row. I am a very positive person, but it's slowly destroying me. I am on holiday at the moment and he's waking even more than usual as he's unfamiliar with the travel cot and new surroundings. I am SO TIRED. My husband is amazing and so supportive but he can't breastfeed so there's only so much he can do.

Anyhow (sorry for a long post btw), now he's nearly six months, I obv need to think about getting him on solids. I'm (naively?) hoping it might help him sleep better at night. But I worry about him drinking. I will obv try to get him to take milk (either breastmilk or maybe formula?) and water from a sippy cup, but what if he won't take them? How does exclusively breastfeeding and weaning at the same time work? Will he ever drink normally?

If anyone has been in this situation, I'd be grateful for some help!

Thank you.

We're still in the middle of it with a 10 month old!

Some things I noticed :

• weaning actually made nights worse (undiagnosed dairy allergy though, so they are improving a bit now)
• she has no problems with water in a sippy cup. Loves it. Formula or breastmilk? Not quite so keen but she will take a few mouthfuls which is more than I can say for her reaction to a bottle
• otherwise being EBF has made no difference to her weaning. Can't help with the advice on how to get your DC to take a bottle though! Or the lack of sleep

Have you tried a Doidy cup? That was the only thing my DD would use, but once she started on that she was fine.

Good luck. I had a terrible sleeper in dd so I know where you're coming from but I don't really have any other advice.

Weaning made nights worse for me too. DD slept through from 11-12 weeks until 6mo. And it also won't change their eating habits. She was only a feed every 2-3 hours during the day before. Now she's 15mo and still on a feed every 2-3 hours during the day, but it's solid instead of bf. (She's completely day weaned).

It's important to have your expectation sorted.

As for the other question. Of course they'll drink from a sippy cup. No one is stuck on a bottle forever. And breastfed babies take to cups faster than bottle fed babies, from the small group of mums I've seen. I think it's just us being much more insistent on it! I recommend a free flow cup because if it's a valve one, your LO won't know he needs to suck those plastic teats. A free flow (like this tommee tippee one) is easier because your LO can tip it and notice water coming out. It will take a while before he clicks that drinks inside the cup will quench thirst too. Same with food, it'll take a while before he knows that food is good for hunger.

As for time scale, DD was off day feeds around 9mo. She was in nursery all day, and she choses to have solid snacks instead of her bottle. She used to take her bottle warm, but she drinks her cow's milk fridge cold. I think she sees it as part of weaning, and being a big girl. She uses a tommee tippee free flow beaker for her milk.

Oh and here's her feeding schedule in the weekend when she's at home, and you can see how busy I am with her eating! All time are approximate

6-7am bf
8am breakfast
10.30am beaker of cow's milk at home, or snack when out
1pm lunch
3pm mid afternoon snack
5pm tea
6.30pm bf
If she wakes up again before 11pm, then another bf

I just end up spending more time wiping her face, hair and legs, and then wiping the floor, the high chair and the walls 5 times a day.

You need to try some more cups - Mine just couldn't get the hang of anything but straws, so that's what he has. He's nearly two and still can't figure out what he's supposed to do with a normal feeding cup, and whilst he can drink from a normal cup he's much happier still with a straw.

All babies are different, don't panic, but mine didn't really drop many feeds until about 10 months, dropped one night feed at about 18 months, and is only now at 22 months sleeping through from 10 till 6..

My bottle refuser has really taken to food and beakers which surprised me. I can leave her with DH now as he can give her some food and expressed milk in her cup!

I really worried bottle refusing = food and water refusing but it hasn't been the case. Just start with the water at every meal and once he's got the hang of that try the milk in it that way you aren't wasting milk and getting frustrated.

Whoops! I meant to say my baby is 5.5 months old, not weeks, by the way.
Thanks everyone for your comments.
I think I know deep down it's going to be hard work getting him to drink a) from a cup or bottle, and b) anything other than milk. I guess I just wanted to know I wasn't alone in having such a fussy baby! Sometimes, when I see other babies swapping happily between boob and bottle, and sleeping more than three hours in a row, while I'm up all night and haven't been able to leave his side in nearly six months, I wonder what I've done/am doing wrong. It's hard, isn't it?! I just console myself with thinking "it's just a phase"..!

Both of mine were bottle refusers and nights were made worse by weaning too. Have you read the No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley?

Once he is on solids and bf through the day you an really try stopping feeds apart from water through the night or saying max 1 feed.

So feed and bf throughout the day. Try bf again before you go to bed ( say 11pm)

Then for the first few days if he wakes before 3am then just offer water. If he's eating solids well and bf every few hours through the day he should easily go 4 hrs at night. Then feed at 3 then again at 7am ish and start the day.

After a few weeks and more solids successfully going in, try feeding at 11pm then only offering water through the night

It might sound harsh but if he's having 5/6 feeds plus solids through the day he really can and will save your sanity. The water can be given but dh if that helps and may be easier as baby knows he can't get milk from him

Have been in exactly the same place as you and posted a similar thing last week. DD 25 weeks and was an ardent bottle hater. I was also up a lot in the night and knackered.
I need to get back to work in a couple of months so the longer term aim was daytime formula and night BF. Started to wean her and put a bit of formula in with her purees and thought we'd keep trying a bottle with expressed milk. Still wouldn't take it. Then I tried a bottle of formula (bit of an emotional leap, but just thought of it like food which helped) and she wolfed it.
After a week I am now doing 3 BFs per day, but afternoon and bedtime are a bottle. She's sleeping better which is great and, crucially, won't starve at nursery!!
The other thing that really helped in the night was sending my partner in if the wake up was less than 4 hours after the last one. Took a week or do but she wakes a lot lot less now. Still up by 6 every morning though
HTH

hi, have you tried changing the formula? I have recently introduced bottle successfully to my 8mo baby after trying hard for more than 3 months. After trying Aptamil and Cow&Gate, I had pretty much given up hope but then I read on one of the posts that somebody had tried Hipp Organic as their baby found Aptamil smelly. Hipp Organic has been a complete success at 8 months+. My baby now guzzles down 5-7 oz at one time and then I top up with breastfeed.

Woody, didn't see you second post . Yes lots of us have been there and I don't want to tell you how old our DS was before he started sleeping through or you might cry, lets just say he'd got a little sister who was sleeping through before he was.

There is some good advice on here already but there is no need to offer water or formula if you don't want to.

The book the No Cry Sleep Solution that I mentioned before is very good and we used it with DS, most libraries will have a copy.

You might also want to read 12 alternatives for the all night nurser, 31 ways to get your baby to sleep and stay asleep and sleeping through the night.

As for the weaning have a read of Will giving my baby formula or solids help them to sleep better? and why delay solids. However, I'm not criticising anyone for their choices, just think that you might benefit from reading some good, evidence based, information .

Have you thought of posting in Breast & Bootle section too asking how to get him to go longer at night or on the bottle refusing?

Oh and have you signed up for the Wonder Weeks emails or got the book? They are very good at explaining what is happening with LO and what to expect next. Don't forget the 6 month growth spurt too .

I've just been through this with my almost-7 month old. Until last week he'd never slept more than two hours at a time, and fed so frequently I co-slept, half-dressed all night.

He was a bottle-refuser too.

It's taken four weeks of practice - and a lot of mess/thrown away food - but he's suddenly enjoying three meals a day, and sleeping so much better.

He's my third so he's had an array of beakers and doody cups to play with. And he absolutely refuses to take anything from a proffered spoon, so it's toast / beans/ pasta, anything he can eat with his hands - still stubborn.

Good luck!