Really worried about dropping milk feeds

[WifiNappies]

Hi I have got myself totally confused and in a mess, I would be so grateful for any advice. This might be a bit long - sorry

My DD is 28wks and was EBF til 4 weeks ago. We did the first 2.5 weeks of Annabel Karmel but then I lost faith in it in conjunction with a 'feeling' that she wanted more than purées iyswim

So having read so much about purées I'm now at sea with trying to do BLW in a foreign country with no books, no HVs and no real Internet (just imagine! It's like the 1800s! ;) ) But I thought its all ok, I have mother's instinct right?

But I'm really confused about the milk thing. She doesn't eat much at all so I'm still giving her all her milk feeds (although shamefully I don't feel confident that we are in a good routine with this - I'm a shit mum), and I don't understand how that will ever change because she hardly eats any solids they just fall out of her mouth. I'm RTW FT in 3 months and I feel time is on me to get this sorted (i cant bf or even pump whilst at work) and I don't even know what I'm doing.

I'm feeling really low so please be gentle [imploring face].

I'm feeling pretty low about it all

At this stage the main food is milk so font worry too much. Maybe start giving one feed a day from a bottle or cup and see how it goes!

You don't need to be in a "good routine", if she gets milk when she's hungry, then you're meeting all her needs for food. So you're not a shit mum for not giving here a particular amount of milk at exact times of day.

She's only 28weeks, so food is not about calories, it's about learning to swalow, learning to chew, and getting the gut full of bacteria and able to digest more complicated foods. She'll continue to get most of calories from milk for another 20 weeks at least, so you don't need to think about dropping milk feeds. Her calorie needs are going up every week still, so the extra solid food calories will actually just stop you having to feed her more milk. She will drop feeds at some point, but even in 3 months she'll probably need formula whilst you're work if you can express.

The first phase of solids is her learning to chew and swallow - that involves a lot of food falling out of her mouth, it's what she does when she's found out there's too much in her mouth for her to swallow it all. She'll learn pretty quickly if you keep giving her food to try, you don't expect she'll just start walking one day without falling over lots of times first - so don't expect it with eating.

Like FredFredGeorge says, you don't expect her to learn to walk in one day do you? (My 1yo has been pulling up and falling over for a month now. Making very little progress towards real walking)!

And don't worry about 3 months time. She'll be 9 months isn't it? I started BLW at 26 weeks, and at first it involved a lot of food falling out and dropping out of her hand. (DD was always enthusiastic, which I hear is not the case for all babies). But by 9 months, she's dropped all her day feeds, and was eating all the toddler food they offer at nursery with no problem at all. The nursery staff always comment on how good her appetite is. They really do change a lot in a few months when they are a baby.

I'm having similar issues but had a bit of a breakthrough today. DD (28 weeks too) I found loves chewing on things but resists any spooned pureed food so what I did today was dip long sticks of toast into some pureed veg. Not exactly BLW as she prefers the food being placed in her hands but - shock - the whole pot of puree disappeared, and she ate some of the toast as well. I'm going to try sticks of steamed veg and cucumber too in a bid that this will prove as popular.