blw and sceptical family

[CinnamonStar]

dd is six months tomorrow and we are just starting weaning. Want to do it more baby led this time after miserable experience with puree with older dd.
At the moment taking it slowly, a few things have been gummed or sucked, then spat out, dd not that interested yet. Which is fine.
But we are staying with inlaws for xmas together with sil and her baby who is a week younger but hasbeen eating for weeks. Mil is always comparing them, asking how much dd weighs and if she is on baby rice yet etc etc.
I am worried that if dd i still at the spitting out throwing food on floor stage she will spend the whole visit going on about it, and pointing out how nephew is on three meals a day and sleeps through the night and doesnt make a mess eating...
Should i just try and spoonfeed dd while we stay as less hassle? She also thinks babies should eat before adults and should be not on parents laps and sheis massively precious about anything spilt on tablecloth. My oldest has v good table manners and is quite a good eater but still usually gets told off at the table at their house for some minor fault.
Is there any chance dd will have got the hang of things in two weeks time? Anyone else had to go through similar? So stressed about the whole thing.

Well I'd definitely do something about the tablecloth! Could you not pop your dd in a highchair with a tray?

Don't worry too much about her attitude generally, just ignore it. If she does start up, just change the subject. I know what a pain it is, i had this with both mil and my own mother.

Your MIL sounds like a massive PITA! Have read your post and was wondering what your DH says about all of this. It seems to me that the easiest thing for you would be to feed your baby how you choose and not how your MIL wishes, then if there is any critism from her, your DH says something like "well this works for us as a family".

Just to ease things you could do things like take a cheap shower curtain for the floor and cover your part of the tablecloth with something like napkins.

Don't worry either about the comparision. She sounds exactly like my MIL comparing my DS and our DN. DN ate everthing and slept all night and my MIL was constantly pointing this out. What she never mentioned for ages though was the fact that actually she wasn't sleeping, she was waking and then being left to scream herself back to sleep every night from 4 months and then went onto wet the bed for years.

Do what you choose to do with your baby and be polite but firm with MIL but most of all make sure you and DH are unified in your approach with her.

went through very similar experience. DD is now nearly 3 and I am so glad we did blw- ds is 10 weeks and can't wait until we are doing same again with him. Yes you encounter some looks of disaproval/ anxiety from others that your little one will choke (they wont!) but you just learn to ignore it. Try not to worry to much what others think. we always had dd at the table with us on one our knees grabbing at the food she wanted- it's great!! Her cousin was 10 weeks older and like you we were always having them compared- she would eat first and was spoon fed puree. As for the mess just tell the host you'll clean up after the meal and that should be good enough in my opinion. enjoy this time of your baby expereincing new things and be confiddent you are doing the right things for your baby.

My FIL sounds a bit like your MIL. I repeat the following phrase "It works for us as a family" This works because it's not saying her way is wrong, it's not complaint and it's not an argument starter.
For instance. At cafe giving DS a whole peach
FIL "You have to force them to take a spoon"
Me "It works for us as a family"
FIL said nothing else and went back to talking about what ever he'd been talking about.

Also why not grab a few plastic picnic mats from poundland to take with you. You can put them down before you and your DD start to eat. Try to say something positive when putting it down like " this way i get to shake it out and let the bird of something too!"
Good luck!

"This works for us as a family" - that is a brilliant phrase! Usually when DH or I try to do something different to MIL then she gets in bit of a huff and says that she managed to bring DH up OK doing it her way , but that sounds quite a diplomatic way of not-engaging with her!

I will take some plastic mats and keep my fingers crossed - I have always cleaned up after DD1 (who isn't messy anyway) but that doesn't stop wincing and eye rolling and tutting whenever there is a crumb or speck of sauce dropped on the precious tablecloth. Maybe I should buy her some new tablecloths for Christmas

Cinnamon sorry I haven't mastered the art of the link but look on Amazon for a Tinydiner portable Placemat. I had these when we BLW our twins and many cafes etc only had one high chair.

It's great, it has a channel (bit like a pelican bib) for catching waste and when you are finished it folds into itself so you can pop it into your bag without washing it. They aren't that expensive - £10 ish and well worth it.

Good luck with Christmas!

love the look of the tinydiner! that might be a bit of a winner.

at hazchem and her bizarre FIL. So obviously he eats a whole peach with a spoon then does he? What a nutter!

Hazchem the tinydiner is great! We used to have two of them and two inflatable highchairs in the bottom of the double buggy as we found it difficult to get two highchairs in some places.

We took them to my folks, my PILs and friends houses as well. One of my best baby gadget buys.

Thanks for the tip - have just ordered my tiny diner!

We didn't actually get on with the tinydiner mat. LO was much more interested in pulling it up and chewing it than she was about any of the food on it.