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Weaning

Find weaning advice from other Mumsnetters on our Weaning forum. Use our child development calendar for more information.

Original poster

My mum put food in my 18 wk old's mouth today

13 replies

DitaVonCheese · 02/12/2011 19:11

I am still livid.

And I don't want to start a bunfight about when to wean. The fact is that we have chosen to wait until 26 wks and she knows this. I'm so angry. Also hate the fact that I feel like I can't trust her around him now.

Angry

What a frickin' cliched MN thread!

OP posts:
funnylittlekaty · 02/12/2011 19:12

Yikes! What food? Really bad that you'd told her not to and she did it anyway. Grrr.

thisisyesterday · 02/12/2011 19:14

what did your 18 week old do?

i mean, if it got spat out then no harm done.

i would be cross if my mum had done that though, and i understand what you mean about not trusting her around him

gah. what did you say? what did she say?

HappyCamel · 02/12/2011 19:14

That's awful. She should respect your wishes as a parent.

Original poster
DitaVonCheese · 02/12/2011 19:21

Thanks all - I just needed to rant to someone who would understand!

I was checking something on her laptop so had my back to them, she was eating her lunch - some sort of baked tart thing - and he was in the highchair as it was the only place he was happy (he likes to sit up). I could hear her saying "You'd like some of this, wouldn't you?", thought she wouldn't actually do it and was just chatting to him but half-keeping an eye on them, and saw her put a bit of the tart in his mouth (bit of cheese I think).

I said "Please don't do that, he's too little", she said "It wouldn't have hurt him" and then we had some discussion about current weaning guidelines, whether they're right, how often they change etc Hmm I should obviously just have said "IT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, I DECIDE" but I am not good at standing up to my mum so thought that was quite a good start.

ARGH Angry

OP posts:
Nesbo · 02/12/2011 19:23

What age did she put food in your mouth?

Original poster
DitaVonCheese · 02/12/2011 19:24

Forgot to say (angry typing Wink) that I didn't see what he did with it - guess I'll see when it does or doesn't turn up in his nappy. Nyargh - putting it in his fricking MOUTH - I wouldn't mind so much if she'd handed it to him but FFS.

DS is DC2. We waited until 26 wks with DD and she mithered about that from 3 months on, and we did BLW, which she hated, but I honestly didn't think she'd do this.

OP posts:
Original poster
DitaVonCheese · 02/12/2011 19:25

Nesbo, probably 3-4 months, whatever the guidelines were at the time. I was fully weaned off bm by 5 months I think, if that.

OP posts:
Nesbo · 02/12/2011 19:37

Well I suppose in plenty of societies she would be the one teaching you how to successfully raise a child ( as she has proved she can do with you). It must create tension that in modern Western society we tend to trust "experts" instead of the generations that raised us (whose experience and opinions now so often get dismissed as old fashioned). That doesn't mean she shouldn't respect your wishes, but I can see why it is difficult for some people to accept.

Northernlurker · 02/12/2011 19:42

Well your baby your rules BUT from your mum's pov - she's offered your child a piece of food. That's not in itself intrinsically harmful. You know ds is 18 weeks and you will not wean for another two months but if you asked your mum how many weeks he is - could she tell you? I think what's happened here is that she's talking to her grandson who is getting big enough to think about food and she's fed him. THEN she's realised she's wrong and she's probably quite defensive about that. Try to let it go.

Original poster
DitaVonCheese · 02/12/2011 19:54

She didn't offer it though, Northern, she pushed it into his mouth. Just offering wouldn't have upset me so much.

Re age, she knows he's not six months and she knows we're not weaning him yet. And yesterday she got a reply from one of her friends re a photo she'd emailed over saying something like "Did you say he's 3 months now?" so she knows roughly how old he is.

Apparently I am starving him because he is 98th centile Hmm

Nesbo she did it her way and has three overweight children Wink I do get your point though.

I'm also a bit sad that I won't be the one to give him his first taste of proper food :(

OP posts:
Original poster
DitaVonCheese · 02/12/2011 22:46

DS has just been spectacularly sick. Coincidence maybe but still :(

OP posts:
YuleingFanjo · 03/12/2011 00:32

hey, , sorry to read this. It's horrible when a family member does something like this, particularly when you feel like you can't confront them about it. Your anger will pass, I know this from experience. Although I can understand how you now feel like you can't trust her. :(

jackie62 · 03/12/2011 00:47

I can understand...I left my three children (8, 5 and 3) with my mum and explicitly told her that I did not want her two badly behaved, huge and frankly dangerous rottveiler dogs anywhere near them,
( they had chased a cyclist the previous
day and bitten her on the bottom). She promised, but when I arrived back they were all milling around together in the garden. When I said I wasn't happy she made out that I was a spoilsport and uptight. And they were 'having so much fun, darling'. Not amused and didn't go back for a couple of years.

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