HELP!!! Feeling anxious and out of my depth regarding weaning. Advice please..

[feckinfeck]

I started giving my dd 'first taste' purees about 2 weeks ago when she 24 weeks, with very little success - It manages to go everywhere except in her mouth. About a week ago I started throwing finger foods in along with the purees I was feeding her. I've tried brocolli, carrot and cauliflower. This she grabs hold of, puts to her mouth, then throws on the floor. I have been only doing lunch times as suggested by AK.

She has her bottles at 8, 11, 14, 17 and 8, and usually takes between 5-7oz in each. She also wakes in the night for a feed around 2am and has 5oz. I have been giving her 'lunch' anywhere between 12.30-1ish.

My questions are:

1. WHY IS SHE NOT EATING?!
2. How do I know when it is 'going well' enough, in order to a)give her another meal and b)drop a bottle
3. What other finger foods can I give her? I am not a fantastic cook and both me and dh work, so tend to rely on freezer food during the week as it is quick and easy! :(
4. AK and national guidance recommend using a free flow cup during meal times. Can anyone recommend a good one to use? Also, she is unable to hold her own bottle yet, so is it not a bit too soon to be trying to get her to hold, and drink from, her own cup?? How can I help her with this?!

I'm sure I'll think of some more questions soon..... I never thought it would this hard!!!

My DD is 31wks so I'm just another mum a few weeks ahead. I'll try to answer your questions

1. First just relax. The aim of weaning is to introduce flavour and texture of real food to your DD, not to stuff them full of solids. I remember seeing a program about fussy toddler eaters on TV, and the expert says food to them is like putting some E-number flavourings used in manufacturing food in front of us. Remember to your DD the carrot you gave her might as well be a snail, a scorpion or seaweed!

1. I assume you are using AK's toddler and baby meal planner. I no longer have my book but i remember it has portion sizes and she says later on, a baby might need 2-3 ice cubes for a meal. Also you can go check out the sizes of 4m jars in the supermarkets. My DD didn't like purees and it's only when I meet up with my NCT group that I realised other 26wk babies do eat the whole pouch of Ella Kitchen's food! I'll first tackle your milk issue. You don't drop her milk feeds. The baby will tell you when she doesn't want it. In my group, the puree babies at 7mo have trouble getting to the recommended 500ml of milk. They just aren't enthusiastic about their bottles and will hardly finish them. As for giving another meal. My DD wasn't having any purees at 26wk. I was having to use games and pulling faces to trick her to open her mouth and sneak the spoon in. (In other words, all is not good). On the advice of my HV I started giving her finger foods (ie BLW) at another meal. DD loved the finger foods. She enthusiastically tasted all of them. Within a week, I ditched the breakfast purees, and moved onto 3 BLW meals a day.

1. For finger foods, have a look at the BLW weaning website for inspiration.

1. I use the tommee tippee first cup, which is free flow. Others I know prefer the doidy cup. I hold on to the bottom of the cup to offer it to DD. When she puts her mouth on the spout, I tilt the cup up so water flows out. If I leave the cup out for her, all she does is bang the cup on the high chair tray :)

I'm really trying to relax but its hard! I'm a born worrier!

I think I'm going to push the BLW a bit more. Is she ok to have things with a skin, like green beans, corn on the cob?!

DD is 9 months and doesn't eat very well or drink very much from a cup or bottle (she's breastfed). My advice is to not worry or stress. It won't do you or her any good and will make her less likely to eat.

First of all try not to worry. My DD hardly ate anything from 5 months to 9 months then all of a sudden she seemed to get the hang of it. Shes now 15 months and eats 3 meals a day with no fuss.

My DD never really liked purees or shop bought jars so we used mostly finger foods. Foods she liked in the early days were fingers of toast, cooked pasta, cooked brocolli, strips of melon, oven chips, pancakes, strips of omlette and strawberries.

As you know milk is supposed to be the main food until 12 months and food at this stage is just for babies to experiment with so if your DD doesn't eat at one meal it doesn't matter just try again at the next.

I found that DD wouldn't eat her lunch until i brought it forward to 1130 so maybe you could experiment with your timings and see what she does?

With regards to dropping bottles I found after a month or so of starting weaning DD was only drinking a few ounces of her 11am bottle so I dropped it. A few months later she was only drinking a few ounces of her 2pm bottle so that was dropped too and so on until now when she a bottle when she wakes up and before bedtime only.

I would give it a couple of weeks of offering food at lunch time then start offering food in the morning at 9ish too and see how you go.

I also used the Tommee Tippee first cup and DD still has her drinks in it now.

Good luck in a few months time you'll be wondering what you were so worried about :)

Is it ok to give her food with skins? Such as tomatoes, peppers etc or do they need to be skinned first?

I think she's going to look like a brocolli floret soon.

I give everything with skin on, edible or not. Tomatoes, mangoes, apples, pears, plums, papaya. DD found it easier to grab and hold squishy food if the skin is on. She always just eat the soft bit and leave the skin she can't chew behind. And even if she swallow the skin of a tomato, it does no harm.

Agree with lilham, I always gave everything with the skin on and DD just spat out the bits she couldn't eat. Make sure you slice up any food soft food with skins though in case she swallows it whole e.g. cherry toms, grapes, some berries etc.
Peppers I would cook so the inside is soft enough for her to remove the skin until she's a bit older.

Thanks for the advice folks. I am starting to relax (a little) now! I just put it on her tray and let her at it. I doubt much (if any), is actually being swallowed. But at least shes tasting it! She had her first chicken dinner on sunday and loves parsnips it seems.
She'll be looking like one of them next :o

They need a bit of practise to get chewing and swallowing. And it's great you share your food with her. I found DD changes her favourite every week. For example she doesnt seem to like chicken anymore.

My DD is nearly 7 months and one thing she really does well is eat!! So maybe I can help. I buy the HIPP organic baby jars for 4 mths or 6 mths plus. These are good as they don't contain sugar and are organic. I don't let her try to feed herself yet, I sit her on my knee with a bib and feed her with a spoon. Yes I know I should buy a highchair soon. She eats at least three to four baby jars a day plus about 600ml formula as well (she was never breastfed). She also has baby porridge and really likes the Organix banana range you can get in Sainsbury's. So my advice (for what its worth) is to quit the finger foods and feed her with a spoon as she wont be able to feed herself yet - it will all end up on her face and not in her mouth. HTH :)

Fwiw my 7mo DD polished off an entire muffin for lunch today. It definitely is not all over her face, crumbs all over the highchair tray yes. Of course they can aim food into their mouth. Does your LO have trouble aiming toys at her mouth?

Besides the OP obviously is going the homemade route given the reference to AK. There's nothing wrong cooking your own is there? Personally I don't see why I should pay 50p (asda price) for a jar of pureed carrot.

When you can try and eat with her and eat similar things, she may then just copy you and eat it too. How is she going to know what to do with this food stuff if you don't show her?

lilham - guess you are right, they have no problem aiming toys at their mouth!! Definitely nothing wrong with homemade, it's probably better, I'm just being lazy :)