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Weaning

Find weaning advice from other Mumsnetters on our Weaning forum. Use our child development calendar for more information.

terrified of choking....

9 replies

hippy3 · 27/10/2011 09:11

hi I am just weaning my 6.5 month olds, I was on here yesterday asking about highchairs, anyway I have introduced pureed foods allready but would like to try finger foods also. But I am TERRIFIED of them choking, ....Is this normal I know I have to gte them used to different textures and encourage them to chew and I want to but any time i give them naything I end up scooping it out of their mouths as I am terrified they will choke.... can someone reassure me. And gv me tips on what finger foods to use, i feel like a paranoid new mum !! and I feel like im excluding them from something fun ! help...... am really beating myself up about it.

OP posts:
Nevercan · 27/10/2011 09:15

Dont worry they will be fine. Their bodies will generally cough up anything they need too just like us. Try softer finger foods like bananas to gain your confidence Smile

BertieBotts · 27/10/2011 09:27

Look on youtube using the search term "BLW gagging" - there are various videos of babies eating foods, gagging, and being perfectly fine. It's much less scary to watch when you know they're going to be okay, and gives you a frame of reference which is "This is what gagging looks like". (Choking is very different - it's silent for a start. That's why you should never leave them unattended to eat)

There is a big difference between gagging and choking. In babies their gag reflex is really far forward - about halfway down their tongue rather than right at the back of it. As long as they are sitting upright, if they are gagging, they will spit everything out. Gagging is actually a defence against choking - they have to learn to chew the food before moving it to the back of their mouths. If you are scooping it out for them you're probably actually making it more dangerous, because you could push the food back further to where they haven't worked out how to deal with it yet. Also, you should let them pick things up themselves rather than holding things to their mouths for them, even if they are finding this frustrating.

You can get mesh feeders which are supposed to keep foods safe but I read somewhere that they are a bad idea because they don't encourage children to go through this natural process of learning to chew - they sort of "drink" the food through the mesh and then when they are presented with an actual stick of soft fruit or veg etc, they tend to suck it rather than chew it, which could lead to them sucking the whole thing into their mouth at once!

Any food is good as a finger food - sticks of boiled or roasted veg are great, soft fruits. Slices of apple are not that great, because chunks can easily break off - slivers are okay, or grated, or whole apples (if they have teeth) or just steam them for a bit first. Toast is better than bread as bread can get stuck in the roof of their mouths. Avoid whole nuts, whole grapes etc. And no honey until they are 1 year (even cooked).

lilham · 27/10/2011 09:43

I don't think being so terrified that you scoop food out of your LO's mouth is normal, if you ask me. What makes you think he will choke? Do you know know another baby who did? Imagine how distressing it is to your LO that you stuff your big fingers in his mouth! Is your LO gagging? It's their natural protection against choking. Do you think attending an infant first aid course will help your confidence? Lots of sure start centers do them.

BertieBotts · 27/10/2011 09:51

Infant first aid course is a good idea, actually.

I think a lot of parents have this kind of anxiety, lilham.

hippy3 · 27/10/2011 13:03

thanks I know its not normal and I havent seen anyone choke...I actually gae them some melon this monring, and just mashed up their lunch as I am TRYING to not be demented...I honestly didnt think I would be like this !!! small steps I think for all of us..and totally agree lilham....It must be awful for them having me scoop things out for them, they usually are having a great time !!

Thanks for teh replies....xxx I am determined to gain confidence with this.... x really dont wnat my two to be fussy eaters... ! or have a complex about food, so need to relax a little bit about it I think.... :).

OP posts:
Mimmee · 27/10/2011 18:53

Actually hippy3 I felt exactly the same when we started, I was utterly terrified. I also have been known to whip food out of DD's mouth in a panic too!

All I can say is that it does get better and you do start to relax. The first few times they gag can be really alarming. But I also found it reassuring because you see them dealing with it themselves and realise it doiesn't bother them IYSWIM?

Read up on what to do on choiking and/or go on a course. Here is link for some info
childrenfirstaid.redcross.org.uk/choking/

Start slowly, steamed sweet potato is good cos it's very soft. I also found it helped to have someone else with me at first if thats possible?

We all have these fears I think, some more than others and it depends on what type of person you are - I know I'm a worrier anyway.

Try to enjoy it, honestly as long as you make sure they are upright and give appropriate foods the likelihood of choking is small and just make sure you know what to do anyway.

Good luck!

lilham · 27/10/2011 19:07

Mimmee I am actually quite anxious too. I think thats natural. Talking to other mums some of them just leave their LO in the high chair with finger foods while pottering around the kitchen. They think I'm strange for sitting down and watching her eat. I just worry I won't see her choke if I'm doing the dishes. Also after a meal she always still has food in her mouth. How do others deal with it? I won't let her go on the playmat in case she gags and is not upright. So I put her in the bumbo seat, give her a terrier and hope all the food sticks to the terrier and come out. Grin I'm pretty sure that's pfb behavior.

lilham · 27/10/2011 19:09

Lol not terrier. Horrible iPhone. I mean teether.

Mimmee · 28/10/2011 21:24

lilham I know what you mean.

I actually do the pottering round the kitchen thing while DD is eating and am so less stressed out this way. She also seems to eat a lot more than when I'm watching her. Obviously I'm right there and keeping a (very close) eye.

I always have a little look in her mouth after and make sure she has a good drink of water which seems to wash everything away.

We're allowed to be a bit PFB aren't we....Grin

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