Pressure to wean early getting me down....

[Moulesfrites]

my ds is 15 weeks and ebf. We had got into a nice pattern where he would go to sleep at 7 and then go for a good 7 to 8 hours, then another 3/4 after a quick bf, but this past week he has started to wake for a feed every 3 hours.

I'm not sure if this is a sleep regression or a growth spurt, it does seem to be relates to hunger, and I am happy to ride the storm out and feed him more often, but when I mentioned it to my mum, she said that he is obviously hungry and needs solids! She said that nor me or my siblings were still just on bm at his age and she thinks the current guidelines to wait until 6m are ridiculous.

I have read up on the signs of readiness for weaning etc and ds is not doing any of them yet....

This has surprised me and as she has been so supportive in all other respects, and unlike my mil, who is v interfering and judgemental, she seems to understand that it is up to us to do it our way. I am finding it hard to deal with, because I feel if I tell her why I am waiting for 6m it is as if I am implicitly criticising the way she did it. But I am exhausted from the night feeds and feel like I need to moan - but i won't get any sympathy from her as she thinks I am at fault for not giving him solids

. Any advice on how to deal with this?

I wouldn't tell her too much to be honest! I selectively tell my MIL certain things as she makes a bigger deal out of them than they need to be.

The current advice has changed back to 'between 4 and 6 months' I believe and in my experience there aren't that many of mine or my friends' children who have held out until 6 months, most have been around the 5 month mark.

Mine were 23 weeks and 24 weeks (so about 5 and a half months) when I weaned them and it did not make the blindest bit of difference to their sleep, they still woke up until around 7 months when they settled more at night. If anything, the introduction of food introduced new issues like constipation (i found that bananas were awful for causing this with my two even though they are a food considered normal to wean with!).

With regard to night feeds, DS2 woke every 3 hours until 7 months, then settled to sleeping all night by 8 months (when I suppose he would have been having a couple of decent meals a day) so it is probably not uncommon to be waking that frequently for a feed at that age, although it is exhausting. Don't they gave some sort of growth spurt/sleep regression at that age? Think so.

Good luck

Sounds like the four month growth spurt to me. There are more calories in bm than puree or baby rice so don't rush if your ds is not showing any signs of being ready for weaning.

Things will settle down in a week or two but he will be hungry seemingly all the time during the spurt.

littlemisslozza where does it say that the advice has changed from 'six months' to 'between four and six months' ?
Just curious as I have been researching this and all the official advice I found still says six months including this: www.mumsnet.com/babies/weaning

OP please try and stick to your guns at least until your DS shows definite signs of readiness. Weaning is pretty pointless until the tongue thrust reflex is lost anyway, it will all just come straight back out. For now he just needs more calories/milk. Its hard though - especially when the pressure comes from family. Good luck !

It was in the news a few months ago, study by the Royal College of Midwives I think. Will look for a link.

Here
www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-12180052

but not RCM, sorry, must have dreamt that! It was in the BMJ and in the news lots back in January.

What it is saying is that SOME babies may benefit from weaning slightly before 6 months and that the 6 months guideline should be a little more flexible. They haven't officially changed the guidance though, I was wrong with that. Agree that they need to be showing signs other than just waking more or being 'big'. They don't actually eat much for the first few weeks of weaning so it wouldn't make a huge difference.

My feelings on it are that some people get quite extreme on the issue - either rushing to get food down them as soon as they are 17 weeks like it's a race to be the first or stubbornly sticking it out til 6 months when some babies might be actually be ready slightly sooner as these studies have shown.

The only foods you would give your baby at this age are fruit purees and baby rice - both of which have fewer calories, fat, protein and nutrients than breastmilk. Weaning him now would be illogical - don't feel pressured. It is completely normal for babies at this age to wake frequently and it has nothing to do with hunger - look up the 4 month sleep regression. It passes...

Thanks Littlemisslozza that was pretty much my understanding of the BMJ article. Totally agree with your last paragraph.

My health visitor said it's weight. 16lb is ready to wean!
True with both of mine DD At 5 1/2 months DS at 17 weeks!
She always slept well he didn't until wheat introduced at 6 months. But by then he was well established on 3 meals a day and exactly the same amount of breast milk as before. So my transition was smoother in the time between 17 weeks and 26 weeks.
MN is not a good place to ask fr weaning advice if you ask me.
Everyone obide the WHO.guidelines. !!
Personally I'd rather trust my instinct as a mother.

Your health visitor doesn't sound very bright. What difference does weight make to the development of the digestive system?

bollocks is it down to weight! so my fourth son almost 11lb at birth and 16lb by the time he was 6/7 wks was ready for solids?!!

no its to do with the lining of their gut and being able to sit up and having the proper hand/eye coordination to hold and eat food and also when they have lost the tongue thrust, which generally is by 6mths tho many are ready at 5ish months.

fwiw my 21wk old baby is now about 17lb and happy on 5 bottles of formula a day and she has no more than 25oz a day, i was asked the other day if she has so little milk is it because she is fillling up on solids/juice?!! i was like umm no she just has milk but doesnt have a big appetite, hasnt affected her growth tho!

first three all bfed and no solids till 6mths, infact one of my boys was more like 7/8mths as he just wasnt interested AND he was 18lb at 12wks old, still didnt need solids tho.

tbh it sounds like you are hitting the 4mth sleep regression, my little one like i said is 21wks and that seems to be passing now........touches wood

It sounds like a growth spurt to me and all fairly normal. Your baby needs more milk at times like this, not things like puree (remember that milk has more calories than a teeny tiny bit of puree, so will fill him up more) so stick to your guns and ride it out. We got a lot of raised eyebrows when we said that we were waiting until 6 months but I'm really glad we did - ok, I can't compare as DD is our first, but it was quite easy getting started as she could sit up in her chair, could pick up food and use the spoon herself and we didn't need to puree, just mashed stuff. And you don't need to worry about what foods they can and can't eat - babies at 6 months can have everything except added salt, sugar and honey.

Mayday I am afraid your HV is seriously misinformed. Weight has nothing to do with it. It is down to development (able to sit up, hand/mouth co-ordination, loss of tongue thrust reflex) and gut maturity. For most babies this will be around six months, but of course some will be ready earlier and some later. I would seriously think about reporting her for that little gem !

Her advice was true in the circumstances of my children.
She was far more knowledgable than the
HV who told me to Blw because you just should.
Fwiw I don't know a single mother who actually waited till 26 weeks except the ones on MN
Both of mine were breastfed to 9 months al

Sorry
Alongside
I don't understand all this less calories than milk argument as I added food ON TOP of the breast milk feeds
Otherwise I would have been feeding every hour and I have a life !

but a baby filling up on 'solids' WILL generally take less milk!! thats the point,

and in the 'real' world, pretty much all the parents at my local toddler group waited till 6mths before weaning, and that was bottlefed as well as bfed babies.

i know very few parents who started weaning before 5mths at the earliest tbh.

That BMJ article was a much misinterpreted opinion piece. The guidelines have not changed.

Do it when you're sure he's ready. By the sounds of it, it's the 4 month growth spurt which is often mistaken for the need to start solids. Listen to him and nobody else (except yourself). If he isn't showing any if the other signs the chances are he's not ready. I waited until 23 weeks, but would have started slightly sooner had we not been on holiday two weeks prior (i wanted to start when everything was much more settled). But no way was he ready at 15 weeks. Yes, he was hungrier during his growth spurt, but if we'd sat him in a high chair his head would have bobbed about and he'd have slumped down. He also wasn't that interested in what we were eating. If you start him too soon it'll lead to problems. Get the timing right and he'll hopefully take to it brilliantly and be eager to try new tastes.

Good advice I got from a friend don't be in a hurry to wean- the poo is not nice!!