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Weaning

Find weaning advice from other Mumsnetters on our Weaning forum. Use our child development calendar for more information.

Original poster

Tips for weaning off bottle at night with 9 month old

15 replies

SharkSkinThing · 27/04/2011 14:18

Help, I need help!

DS is 9 months old, and we have got him into the habit of having a bottle of ff in the night (I weaned him off night BF at 7 months, the FF was supposed to be a temporary bridge, but, well, you know how it is...for a while it was a bit of a god-send for me as I could sleep more, but now he wakes, feeds, and then stays awake for up to an hour).

DS is eating very well in the day, 3 huge meals, has BF first thing, FF after lunch (7oz) and again before bed (7oz). He is a great weight.

How do I get rid of the bottle? Should I just reduce the amount in it over a week or so, until there is nothing, and he just gets a sshh and a cuddle? OR should I water it down? Won't he then just wake for water? Should I let him cry for a few minutes before even going in to settle? Or try and settle first, then let him cry for two minutes, then offer milk? The let him cry a bit longer the next night etc etc???

Any tips very, very much appreciated...

OP posts:
Lolly75 · 27/04/2011 14:44

Try giving milk before bed and then only water if baby wakes during the night. You will probably find they decide its not worth waking for. However, it is approaching summer and the warmer weather so little one might be thirstier than usual!

Original poster
SharkSkinThing · 27/04/2011 14:55

He has milk before bed, a full bottle. And I also tried the just water approach last week - an hour of screaming and I cracked....so I think he'll respond better to a gradual withdrawal, over a week, say.

I'm not sure if I should CC at this stage (really don't want to), or just stick with trying to settle, let cry for a couple of mins, then the milk. Is it too much for him to get used to?

OP posts:
Lolly75 · 27/04/2011 17:05

CC works but it is quite hard work and painful to see through as you just feel cruel but they do eventually learn to go off to sleep. Just have to prepare yourself for 3 or 4 difficult nights until you crack it.

mandoo · 27/04/2011 17:10

I'm with Lolly. Cold turkey, it's the best way.

Did the same with my DS at that age. He was still waking for a bottle twice a night. Under the HV advice I started on the tues night which was the worst night 3 hours of crying in total but by fri he was sleeping though....Bliss!

Original poster
SharkSkinThing · 27/04/2011 18:20

Thanks, guys. I'll reduce again tonight until we're down to one ounce by the weekend, and then be prepared for all hell to break lose around Saturday night. At least then I can catch up on sleep on Sunday and Monday!

Mandoo - did you pick your DS up and cuddle, or just go in and try and settle whilst eh remained in the cot?

OP posts:
RitaMorgan · 27/04/2011 19:40

Does he wake for the feed or is it a dreamfeed?

If he's waking for it, I'd start by going in half an hour earlier and feeding it to him in his sleep so hopefully he'll stop waking for it. When we got rid of ds's nighttime bottle at 8 months I did it over a couple of weeks - first reducing in til it was only 100ml, then bringing it forward til it was at 9ish, then stopped. After that he just got cuddles and water in the night. I could have probably stopped it quicker to be honest.

Original poster
SharkSkinThing · 27/04/2011 19:53

Rita - he can wake at any point between 1am and 4am (if he wakes at 4am I'll BF and hope he'll go back down). So it's impossible to know when to pre-empt him! He's also gone through from 7pm to 5am a few times, so I know he can do it.

I'm feeling that reducing is the way to go, it fits with what I think he'll respond to, and I'm less likely to cave/feel like an evil mother. He only had about 5oz's last night, so we'll go down to 4 tonight.

Eek!

OP posts:
mandoo · 28/04/2011 07:34

shark I totally left him. HV said I could go in if I wanted but not to get him out of the cot. I felt this would have made matters worse so I just let him get on with it. He cried at 3 intervals for around an hour each time, which was horrible. The next night he woke up twice for about 20/15 mins each time. The next night was just once with a little bit of a cry. The next night he slept though.

I really worried that after the first night I would go and pick him up in the morning and he would be all sad and traumatised but he was fine. Plus life started to get better all round as we both started getting some decent sleep.

Good luck and try and stay strong with it.

Original poster
SharkSkinThing · 28/04/2011 08:14

Thanks, Mandoo

But guess what - he slept through, from 7pm until 5.30am. So now what? Never offer milk again, just water and a cuddle (or not)?

Babies are so weird.

OP posts:
RitaMorgan · 28/04/2011 12:43

If he slept through last night, then I'd take that to mean he's getting enough calories in the day so doesn't need the night milk. Personally I do offer water in the night if ds wakes, because I have a glass of water by my bedside so it seems fair he should have the same opportunity!

Original poster
SharkSkinThing · 28/04/2011 14:08

Rita - I agree, and my instincts tell me this is a bit of a gift, so we should go with it. DP thinks we should still offer milk, but I want to remove now, and only offer a cuddle and water.

This is not the first time he's slept through like this, so I also believe that my offering milk we're hindering his sleep independence. If that doesn't sound too up-my-own-arsey!

Thanks so much for your help everyone. x

OP posts:
Original poster
SharkSkinThing · 29/04/2011 08:36

Well, that was a fricking disaster. Woke at 2am, would NOT settle with cuddle/water, screamed like he was being murdered, ended up giving him almost a whole bottle of milk at 2.45am.

DP seems to think we never agreed to trying to sort this at 9 months and sees no reason why he can't continue having a night feed until a year. Someone please tell me I'm doing to right thing by easing him off it now?

OP posts:
RitaMorgan · 29/04/2011 08:39

Having to do a random night feed in the early hours would kill me, so you're not wrong to want to stop that. As a compromise maybe do the bottle at 10.30pm, then you know he's not hungry if he wakes again?

mandoo · 29/04/2011 12:08

Your doing the right thing. Tell DP that it will still be the same at a year. You will still have to go through what your going though now, except you will be on your knees with exhaustion by then!

Original poster
SharkSkinThing · 29/04/2011 15:03

We've reached a compromise (again) - reducing the milk over the next few nights and seeing where that gets us. If DS screams about it DP think we should up the milk, but there is no way I am backtracking once we've started down this path. Why would you? Sometimes I wish I had a DP who would just let me get on with it instead of this constant conflict about parenting.

If I've managed to wean him off the boob, then I can wean him off a bottle!

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