Hand hold & hair stroke needed!

[FessaEst]

Please calm me down and tell me it will all be ok!

DD is 9 months old and weaning has been a disaster. She has been a voracious bfeeder from the start, refused to take milk (expressed or formula) from a bottle or cup and probably has a dairy intolerance.

I started BLW and it was amazingly slow. I then tried some babyrice & fruit puree and soya yoghurt on spoons, which she hated, and became quite stressed when put in highchair, so I gave up entirely. I have recently started weetabix and milk in the mornings, and this was going well, with me giving her loaded spoons and her feeding herself. She will occasionally eat rice cakes/bread sticks and houmus/veg sticks/slices as snacks and does like soya yoghurts if she feeds herself. She has once or twice eaten something off my/DH's plate in true BLW style but I can name these occasions and they are not increasing in frequency. She will not eat any "meals"/veg etc mashed up off a spoon and just throws BLW attempts on the floor.

On the one or 2 days that she has had weetabix in the morning and lots of snacks in the day, her (usually terrible) sleep has been amazing, with just one night feed. I am desperate for this to be the norm, but she has stopped eating anything now. I am so stressed out by this. I am going back to work soon, she barely eats, won't take milk except from me and I can't see a way out of this mess! I hate other people seeing how little she eats, especially when other babies of her age are gobbling down their lunch etc.

I have read Gill Rapley, know a lot of it makes sense, know I need to make eating fun and have really tried to relax about the whole thing but currently feel like a bit of a crap mum. Any thoughts or just a pat and "there there"?

Anyone have any words of wisdom?

Breakfast and lunch have been refused today!

Is she teething? I don't have much direct experience, since my DD was weaned early (to help her reflux) and she generally wolfed down everything in sight. However, teething did put her off food at times.

When you go back to work, who will be looking after your DD? I have found that mine often ate better at nursery where she was seeing other children eat, and I think the staff just have more skill then me at making mealtimes interseting.

When DD was about 12 months she did start to get difficult with me at mealtimes. Eventually I realised that she did not like me sitting in front of her highchair, feeding her - it was too 'confrontational' IYSWIM. Things improved alot when I sat her at our dining table, put food on a serving plate in the middle of the table and served myself some, then asked her if she wanted some. She seemed to like the fact that she was getting my food, and started grabbing bits for herself.

Sorry, I can't give you much help. It is really stressful when you know the food is what she needs but she doesn't understand that yet. Please don't compare your DD to others - they are all different. She will get there in the end.

It'll be okay.

It all seems like it'll never be any better, but she will get there.

My DS didn't eat most of his meals at 9mo (I think that's normal for BLW) and if I tried to feed him anything pureed he'd pointedly refuse and try to hit the spoon out of my hand.

All mums know that babies have different ways of eating, so anyone seeing you and your LO around food times will not be judging you.

Try to relax (if you can!) and know that mums whose babies will take purees seem to have babies who create little mess and eat entire pots of food, but there are lots of us out there whose babies just take a little longer. To put it in proportion for you, I think my DS only 'discovered' food and started regularly eating most of his meals around 11 months.

And yes, he eats a lot better at nursery - no idea why!

It's okay, you're doing fine. And just think of what your LO will be able to accomplish as an adult with that sort of determinedness!

Thank you! Thank you both!

I think she is teething - although that seems to be pretty constant, poor little mite.

I am going to try and relax about it again, I think I just feel the pressure of going back to work, but am hoping that if the milk isn't there and she sees other children eating she may eat a bit more.

Thank you for your reassurance, it's great to know your DS eats well know BB!

I came onto this site to write this query - pretty much word for word! Been awake since 5 am with my dd who didn't eat a thing yesterday and I seemed to spend most of the day clearing her dropped food off the floor and most of last night boob feeding her. She, too, feeds really well at nursery - Grrr!

Good to know there is light (shining very dimly)