Explaining veganism to my four-year-old and vegan diet supplements

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I have a dd who is 4 years old. Until now she has had an omnivore diet- my husband eats meat and I decided it’s easier to make sure she has enough iron etc by allowing meat a couple of times a week.
However she has started asking questions why I eat differently to daddy and her. How do I explain in a child friendly way?
The reason I don’t eat meat is the cruelty to animals aspect.
If she decided that she would like to adopt a vegan diet which supplements are you giving to your children to ensure they have sufficient nutrients? Omegas, iron etc?

At this age I would just say that mummy doesn’t like the meat/dairy etc. she absolutely doesn’t need to know mummy finds it cruel to eat animals.

Honestly I would just say you don't like eating meat or that you prefer to eat other foods like grains and vegetables and leave it at that. She's 4 and saying you don't eat animals because you love them as suggested above seems quite manipulative and designed to ensure she stops eating meat.

This exactly but she also needs to not be put off eating meat either if she’s been used to it.

reminds me of the time my daughter who was about 4-5 in reception “shared” her ham sandwich with a vegetarian child 😂 and he went home and said he loved it and the mum went on the group chat playing merry hell!!!! Wishing to identify who did that!!

My boys were always told we don’t eat animals
but they didn’t either so maybe it was easier

The question only came up really when they went to school.

I suppose there is no right or wrong way to navigate this. I always said I would let her decide either way when she’s old enough I’m just not sure how old is old enough to make an informed decision- but I guess neither has to be permanent.

My dd was vegan from birth so a slightly different situation (I let her choose what diet to follow when she was 7 as that seemed old enough to make the choice).

I told her that her daddy and I didn't eat meat because we love animals and don't want to eat them (dp is veggie rather than vegan).

I said that I didn't drink milk because cows make milk for their calves, not for people. I can't remember what I told her about eggs.

As a very young child, she knew she was vegan like her Mummy and didn't question it any more than young children generally question their religion or any other belief system in which they are being brought up.

I didn't give her supplements, just a balanced diet.

Personally, I think the idea you “don’t like” dairy or meat is also difficult. You wouldn’t let her opt out of eating fruits and vegetables because she doesn’t like them.

I think at 4 I would draw the connection between animals and meat/dairy. It’s an age appropriate milestone to know where foods come from. A simple, “mummy chooses not to eat food from animals” is what I would go with.

I just don’t understand why people find this kind of thing funny. Like this post where you’re laughing a vegetarian child ate ham.
what other ethical or religious or just general choices do you also find hilarious when disrespected or broken?

Im vegan, raised the kids veggie as a compromise and never gave them meat. They are adults now and dh eats and always has eaten meat.
I just said I don’t like eating animals, that’s why we were vegetarian. I think because you are happy with your dd eating meat you have to be more careful if you don’t want to commit to veganism or vegetarianism for her. Maybe we don’t all eat the same things, I don’t eat food made from animals, but you and dad do.

Agree with this post
Its really not funny at all

I would just say I don't like eating food that comes from animals, and that lots of people do eat it but some people are not happy to. There is no point lying about it since she'll soon understand the basics of what it means anyway. Whatever her reaction is, I'm sure she'll be fine and you will be able to accommodate her wishes. Perhaps she will want to become a vegetarian and not a vegan at this stage, or maybe she will not think much about it and continue to eat like her dad.

Don't say it's cruel or you love them or anything like that. She'll be heavily influenced and could feel anxiety around meat.

I'd just stick with the fact you don't like it and if you don't eat something for a long time you don't miss it. I think maybe in two or three years she'll get to the cruelty side and will be a bit more emotionally developed to cope with it.

My child was sharing - which incidentally is a school value, and was pointed out by another mum on the group chat when she was going off on one and they were reception age ffs

My child didn’t know this child was a vegetarian and he clearly didn’t know he could accept food off other kids. It was interested he’d given my daughter a cube of cheese first and she wanted to show kindness back.

He’s not going to die eating a ham sandwich and if the mother was that bothered she should have educated her child not to take food off others and swop food.

Disgusting attitude.

The idea of giving a young child supplements because the vegan diet won't provide all the necessary nutrients for their age seems wrong to me. I would keep her eating meat until her range of foods is sufficient without the need for a supplement of any kind.

He’s not going to die eating a ham sandwich

I’m the first to raise an eyebrow at veganism generally in the West, but fuck me this is awful. Who the hell are you to decide what is or isn’t going to happen to someone else’s child?? This is outrageously selfish, arrogant, obnoxious and frankly uneducated behaviour made worse by continuing to believe you weren’t in the wrong. Nasty, nasty.

Yes I thought that when I read the group chat - what a bad attitude…….

Her child shared a cube of cheese and my child gave him a sandwich - it wasn’t a malicious act

The mum complained to the chair of governors who reiterated the school value of sharing and said that it wasn’t deliberate and basically the other woman looked ridiculous creating such a fuss on a non-event!

My child could have had a dairy intolerance with the cube of cheese given to her first

more people are allergic to dairy than ham

I meant finding it funny.

The people I know who don't eat ham don't do so because of religious or ethical reasons.

I’m not talking about the children’s behaviour - they’re children. No, a ham sandwich isn’t going to kill anyone most likely, even if they’re Jewish or Muslim. I’m talking about your behaviour. You’re a grown woman. How on earth can you not be anything other than apologetic on behalf of your child, parent to parent? Instead you’re laughing about it?!

But it was completely innocent on the part of both children. Surely the humour comes from that?

My kids’ school doesn’t allow kids to share food - I also find it really weird that no teachers stopped your child from giving ham to a vegetarian child. Very weird all around.

There are 2 Muslim kids in my DC’s class who eat vegetarian food only at school. Your child could have given a Muslim child a ham sandwich and that’s just not okay - awful that you find this funny.

I’m not apologising to ANYONE for my child trying to be kind when they accepted some food off another child and wished to reciprocate. Not a bloody chance!

The other woman was so rude on the group chat, shouting the odds, she was awful to the teaching staff, the lunchtime supervisors and to the governors she made a right show of herself. It was an innocent act of sharing.

Most people supported me on the wattsapp chat and she left the group chat.

She saw me on the school run shortly after all this kicked off and she knew she’d made a right twat of herself being so rude to everyone and she didn’t know where to put herself. The other mums had my back and so did school she was ridiculous.

So no - I absolutely wasn’t going to apologise.

How on earth can you not be anything other than apologetic on behalf of your child

What is she supposed to apologise for? Her dd didn't do anything wrong. She didn't know the other child wasn't supposed to eat meat. And presumably the other child didn't know he wasn't supposed to eat it either, or he would have said 'no thank you' when it was offered.