Going wrong somewhere?

[Rayn]

Ok so we are both not good at budgeting. My DH earns a good wage and I work part time round the kids. We have a disposable income after bills of 1200 for food fuel clothes etc. This is for two adults and four kids. However, we just can't seem to spend within that and ending up borrowing the last week of the month. The kids always seem to need something and yet we don't buy anything for ourselves.
I panic about money and DH says 'its fine we work hard and deserve it' (such as a take out) but I just don't know where it goes. I budget 125 for example for food shopping but end up going over.

When we have an emergency such as car breaking down it has to come.out.of this money.

And Savings ... What savings?

Tried budgeting and YNAB but always seem to go over.

So do you think 1200 is enough for a family of six after all bills are paid and please help me know how to live within this?

XX

You need to be more exact about what that £1200 needs to go on.
What’s your food expenditure for a month? Toiletries?
How much fuel do you need?
Anything else?
Do you menu plan? That saves a lot of money.
Out of the money you’ve left over, take some out, maybe £100, £150 and put it straight into a savings account and forget about it until a big expenditure comes along.

Well, it depends what it's covering as PP said

So the 1200 is all the non-fixed costs? Does that include: public transport, parking, childcare, gifts, any eating out incl coffees, toiletries, days out incl school trips? I know you said it includes fuel and groceries. How realistic it is depends on whether you have a big childcare bill, I would say. Otherwise it is do-able but would need active keeping an eye on. We are a smaller household, but I aim for non-fixed costs of about 700, with 200 of that petrol for work commute.

Are you counting rent/mortgage, home insurance, council tax, tv, Internet, mobile phone, elec, gas/oil, water, car insurance outside the 1200?

If you've tried budgets and they've not worked, I wonder if you are not including something in the budget? If you're paying it in the real world, it has to go in the budget no matter what it does to the numbers, otherwise things will never "work". Can you go back through a month or two of bank statements and look at everywhere the money is going, and look for patterns? Keep a notebook in your handbag and write down every single spend; that's a sobering experience but very effective for me.

I'd be worrying too if you're ending up needing to borrow at the end of every month. Something isn't being factored in. Can you start with smaller savings and work up? So on another thread someone suggested the nice supermarket meals instead of take-away, working up to cooking "fake-away" at home? Aiming to get the grocery shop in for £5 less one week, then again the next week, and keep it at that level for 2 weeks, then reduce again the following month? Jack Monroe recipes are super tasty, quick and designed to be cheap. Saus-agne is a big hit here and makes one pack of sausages go a VERY long way

It's only when you really know your spending, that you can start to have enough control over it that you can confidently set aside an amount straight into savings as soon as you're paid. That then let's you build up a safety net for things like car repairs, Christmas, washing machines that pick the worst possible moment to give up...

Thanks for the replies! It is for food, clothes, holidays, presents, car maintenance, school stuff, days out, prescriptions etc Everything except household bills.

No childcare as youngest gets 30 hours.

Feel like a failure not managing but I will take some of your advice on board and start again. X

You're not a failure! You're working and you have four children. I find staying on top of the budget takes a LOT of energy, but it does get easier.

IYou are massively underestimating food bills. You have to feed six people. I'd budget £5pppd which is £210 pw. That is to include 3 meals each pd. So no buying sandwiches at lunchtime or takeawayas, as they really easily tip this budget overboard. But you could take DC's lunch money out of that budget if they eat at school. If they have packed lunches, or if packed lunch is cheaper than school meals, it could come from that budget.

I use my Monzo card to budget. Every month I can see where my money has gone I.e, shopping, food, entertainment etc.

You can see where you're blowing it

You need to spend a month writing down absolutely everything that you spend, and what on. Try your best to spend normally, so don't specifically try to hold back because you know you're writing it down.. if that makes sense.

Then, you will probably see. I know someone has said you will probably need to spend £200 a week on your shopping, but I honestly don't see why. There are so many meals that can be made in bulk, and cheaply, and great deals these days, that I am fairly certain that I could do shopping for 6 people for £100 (maybe even less!) without anyone feeling like they've missed out.

Just take a look at exactly what you're spending on, and that should make things a little clearer :).

A suggested above - write everything down then spend some time looking at the results.

Ask yourself, did I really need to buy that? Was it really worth it? How long did I have to work to buy that?

Look at everything in the long term as well - multiply things up to work out how much you spend on an item each year/10 years.

Look for own brands rather than "named" brands - they are usually ok and much cheaper.

Thanks for all your replies. Looked at a youtuber Jordan Page. She makes alot of sense so going to try some of her ideas?