Love to know what mum's think of the Scottish Baby Box poem

[toomuchpink]

Love to know what mum's - especially those in Scotland - think of this poem. It is going into the Scottish Government's new baby box of freebies for parents of newborns.

Tempted to ask for alternative suggestions which truly capture the experience of having a baby. But perhaps for some people this is what it is like?

Jackie Kay
Welcome Wee One

O ma darlin wee one
At last you are here in the wurld
And wi’ aa your wisdom
Your een bricht as the stars,
You've filled this hoose with licht,
Yer trusty wee haun, your globe o' a heid,
My cherished yin, my hert's ain!

O my darlin wee one
The hale wurld welcomes ye:
The mune glowes; the hearth wairms.
Let your life hae luck, health, charm,
Ye are my bonny blessed bairn,
My small miraculous gift.
I never kent luve like this.

A box without the attached natal care is just a box

YY to this. If it came with a progressive taxation policy, improvements in housing and education, increased investment in healthcare etc etc etc then I'd be more impressed (although the poyem remains tartan and shortbread shite) - but in isolation it is nothing more than an expensive an nationalised Bounty ack.

And/pack

That'd have fair pushed me over the edge after ds1, not feeling normal because everyone assumed id love him straight away. I didn't.

So many crass assumptions in putting that poem in. Could be so damaging to so many women and it's absolutely unnecessary.

Shenanigans has hit the nail on the head with all of her comments - you need the services to be so much better and more targeted so so much more than a populist universal gimmick. This will make virtually no difference to those who actually need it because their problems are so much bigger than a few baby grows, a thermometer and a single reusable nappy (and by the way WTF is the point of that without the soaking bucket, disinfectant etc) will solve

I found this one most apt:

The cats nestle close to their kittens,
The lambs have laid down with the sheep.
You are cozy and warm in your bed, my dear.
Please go the fuck to sleep.

The windows are dark in the town, child.
The whales huddle down in the deep.
I'll read you one very last book if you swear
You'll go the fuck to sleep.

The eagles who soar through the sky are at rest
And the creatures who crawl, run and creep.
I know you're not thirsty. That's bullshit. Stop lying.
Lie the fuck down, my darling, and sleep.

The wind whispers soft through the grass, hon.
The field mice, they make not a peep.
It's been thirty-eight minutes already.
Jesus Christ, what the fuck? Go to sleep.

All the kids from day care are in dreamland.
The froggie has made his last leap.
Hell no, you can't go to the bathroom.
You know where you can go? The fuck to sleep.

The owls fly forth from the treetops.
Through the air they soar and they sweep.
The hot, crimson rage fills my heart, love.
For real: shut the fuck up and sleep.

The cubs and the lions are snoring (snore)
Wrapped in a big, snuggly heap.
How come you can do all this other great shit
But you can't lie the fuck down and sleep?

The seeds slumber beneath the earth now,
And the crops that the farmers will reap.
No more questions, this interview's over.
I've got two words for you, kid: fucking sleep.

The tiger reclines in the Siberian jungle.
The sparrow has silenced her cheep.
Fuck your stuffed bear, I'm not getting you shit.
Close your eyes, cut the crap: sleep.

Flowers doze low in the meadows
And high on the mountains so steep.
My life is a failure, I'm a shitty-ass parent.
Stop fucking with me please, and sleep.

The giant pangolins of Madagascar are snoozing
As I lie here and openly weep.
Sure, fine, whatever, I'll bring you some milk.
Who the fuck cares? You're not gonna sleep.

This room is all I can remember.
The furniture crappy and cheap.
You win! You escape, you run down the hall
As I nod the fuck off and sleep.

Bleary and dazed I awaken
To find your eyes shut, so I keep
My fingers crossed tight, as I tip-toe away
And pray that you're fucking asleep.

We're finally watching our movie.
Popcorn's in the microwave: "beep!"
Oh shit, goddamn it, you've got to be kidding.
Go the fuck back to sleep!

I would have appreciated the solidarity of it.

Yep - that's more like it

Love it horizon
Reminds me of Tim Minchin's Lullaby..

Horizon I think most mothers in Scotland would identify with that poem more.

Good stuff. Forgot to link the author: It comes in a beautifully illustrated book, perfect gift to new parents (after a small delay where they reach the point where they feel receptive to it...)

www.amazon.co.uk/Go-F-Sleep-Adam-Mansbach/dp/0857862650/ref=tmm_hrd_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1483400189&sr=1-1

It's a beautiful poem by the Scottish Makar.
You don't actually need to understand every word – go by the cadence and the rhythm. I love the language and the tenderness.

I also love the idea behind the baby box, which I don't think everyone is aware of:
"These boxes will be handed out to expectant parents by the health service in a bid to encourage expectant mothers to make use of midwifery services, enabling them to have ante natal checks which could pick up dangerous pregnancy related conditions, or problems with the unborn baby."
Looks like the distribution of the baby boxes could impact very favourably on the wellbeing of mums and babies. Possibly being linked in with health services will also be to the advantage of mothers suffering from post natal depression.

It depends on what their outcome measures are and how they are linking them to continual care. Given that the pilots are 3 months, it will be interesting to see how they plan to evaluate that.

As for the cadence and rhythm, a poem written in a language which is inclusive i.e. english (whilst retaining that cadence and rhythm) would achieve more impact.

The cadence and rhythm of the poem are crap too.

Aye it is
A stonkin' great pile o'
shite an' naebiddy in the
wurrrrld really wans tae
hear
aboot their
globe
heided bairny surely?

c. Makar Chen

Arf.

"globe heided bairney"
Here's my version:
Anither wean and a mooth tae fill
I've no enuf tae pay the bills
Ma man's a fuckin waste o space
He's aye asleep or aff his face,
The big Yin's greetin, his airse is skelped
He's skivin skael, which disnae help!
The pluggy will be at ma door
He'll get a moothfu and plenty more,
The lassie wilnae eat her denner,
On the scrounge fer my last tenner
Spends it all on tags and Buckie
Couldnae give a flying fuckie
And noo, this wean will see me deid
Wi its shiny eyes and baldy heid
Ah really need a box of shite
To put the wean in overnight
And can ah huv a poyum please
For when ah sit and tak ma ease,
It's just the joab and will look braw
When hangin on the cludgie wa'
And when ah'm done wi' readin' it
I'll flush it wi ma ither shit!

Demented Makar

Poem cost next to nothing to add to the box.

Do we critique the poems in new baby cards?

Baby box is a fine idea and if you don't want one, you don't have to have one.

I think its lovely. It brought a tear to my eye

Baby boxes are a great idea. It's a here and now meeting of needs for some. Exeutive needs to back it up with more paediatric health specialist training.
The poem not so much. There is more to the Scots dialect than the west coast.

Do we critique the poems in new baby cards?

I'd critique the poem in a new baby card if it was as twee and shortbreed as that one - and it wouldn't be a positive critique.

Scottish - that poem is written in Scots, which is not to be confused with the west coast dialect. Apparently. Even though everyone knows it mainly is - and that the majority of Scottish people don't speak that way.

You win the poem competition by a muckle mile demented - love it!

That is an excellent poem demented.

If the government sent me a card for any reason, I'd feel free to critique any poem in it and the design on the front. After all I paid for it anyway.

If a friend gave me a new baby card, I wouldn't even read the poem. I don't read the poems when choosing cards. I buy them for the picture on the front. The poem is a waste of space on the inside. If people buy me cards I read what they've written. And since it's a genuine message from someone who knows me, I would have no reason to take the piss out of it.

Twee, tartan shite from the government is always fair game for rigorous critique.

Brilliant poem Demented!

Brilliant poem, Ma

Well, again, those that don't want one don't have to have one.

I wonder what they'll go on eBay for?

What about all the people who think it's a misguided waste of public resources?

And an even worse one if people are just going to sell them on eBay.