3yr old only wants TV!!

[Cosmod]

My almost 3yr old is so obsessed with TV. Until the past week or two, she'd only have maybe an hour a day max, she was excellent with solo playing, loved to draw and read, would run around outside and look for bugs, play with toys outside and would always say 'yes!' to every opportunity for going outside.

We've just moved into a house with a perfect size big garden and as the weather's getting nicer I'm always outside soaking up the sunshine! But over the past week it's like a different kid!!
I'll ask her to come outside and she will full on scream, cry and tantrum about not having TV. She won't play or do anything active. She just wants to sit and stare at TV.
I'm not anti TV at all, it's got a load of benefits and I never let her watch anything she shouldn't be. Its all educationalish, not too overstimulating and fairly 'gentle' TV, but she literally won't do anything else. Its the first thing she asks for in the morning, and in the evening she asks if she can watch TV tomorrow!

I think it's likely because she knows she isn't allowed. I'd usually try and wait it out until the afternoon for TV, when we are both tired from the day it's nice to just rest on the sofa and watch something before dinner, but at the moment she's not having it!

I gave in today, there was only so much screaming and crying I could take. Usually I manage to delay TV time by a few hours with going out and doing errands, but for once we've had nothing to do today! I've had awful headaches recently, and it's honestly easier on all of us to just put it on. But I'm running out of ideas! I can't find any toys that keep her busy for more than 3 seconds, she won't come outside to 'help' me, and she won't come for a walk without tantruming about wanting to watch TV instead. She doesn't want to bring toys outside, I even suggested watching some TV on my phone outside, and it was a big foot stomping no🙃

Does anyone have any ideas for toning down the sudden TV addiction and getting some fresh air without dealing with absolute meltdowns first?

I'm super outdoorsy, and I just want to share this with my daughter. But she's having none of it and it's exhausting🙃

I would start offering tv time first thing in the morning before she asks, so it was you who made the decision and you didn't give into a tantrum. Tell her she can watch 1 epiasde/film whatever, then it will be off to do something else.

If that doesn't work then cut it out entirely and slowly reintroduce.

We also bought a kids kindle for my DD as we can set limits so it automtaically turns off. She uses this instead of TV as i can control it better

Don’t give in to the tantrums, distract her or ignore them. Have a set couple of programmes she can watch & watch them with her then say, “right, now let’s….” & switch it off to do an activity with her/ go outside, etc,. Maybe make her a little plan for the day in the morning while she eats her breakfast, with the TV time clearly marked in it. Talk about it while you do it and use simple little pictures so she can refer to it herself. Stick it where she can see it. You won’t have to do this forever but it should help her to make sense of how the day should be and when she can watch some TV.

Move the TV out of the house so it’s not there for them to want.

I babysit kids like this sometimes and it’s awful - they won’t play or look at a book or talk to you.
They just stare at the TV for hours. If I turn it off they scream and the parents tell me they want to watch it, so they allow them to do so unlimited……

I generally won’t go back and sit for these families. It’s bad for the kids and sooooo dull for me.

I'd just switch it off and ignore any histrionics. I did exactly that quite often. Go and sit in the garden yourself if you want to while she tantrums inside. I bet she subsides and comes out after five minutes. Even if she goes on longer, sit it out. You have to be more determined than she is.

You are the parent and you make the decisions. She doesn't.

Some ideas.

Try ‘first and then’ - first we go into the garden/play etc - then we watch tv.
A visual ( picture cards) might help.

This could be extended, first we... then we watch tv, then we....

Have a sand timer, when the timer ends the TV goes off. This gives her a visual warning.

Anything you try, keep at it, tears possibly at first but these should reduce as she adapts.

Some children need some time to process, sudden change can upset them.
Some children need to see things visually, helping them to understand.

Make it part of a fixed routine and allow it for the same time each day (unless ill). Then she’ll know that it’s not a possibility any other time. But you have to stand absolutely firm.

You need to phase it out and as PP has suggested make it your decision when it comes on. We had this probably after I had second DC and was on my own with them both a lot, second DC cried a lot and never slept well during the day as a baby so I was exhausted and found it difficult to play or manage them both for about the first 6 months, so we had a lot of TV.

We gradually phased out having it on so much by being clear at that start it was one episode and then we're doing xyz. Often then when I'd mentioned xyz Eg craft activity DD would want to do that and forget about the TV. So make it about the fun alternatives rather than 'no TV'. But ultimately take control at points and when it's time to go off that's it!

You could go cold turkey, take the batteries out of the controller, or take the fuse out of the plug. Then the tv is "broken" and nobody can use it. You might have to to put up with some tantrums for the first little while, but when she realises it's really gone, you will find life a bit easier.