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I honestly can't do this anymore. I'm in a living nightmare

1 reply

LittleWhiteDogWithABlueBowtie · 26/08/2026 17:46

I don't know what I have done to deserve this life.
I have teens/young adults all at home. As a family we are dealing with Autism, bipolar, eating disorders, suicidal ideation, college/school refusal, PDA, extreme social anxiety, agoraphobia and historical childhood SA with extreme self harming.

Every day is a fucking nightmare and a new struggle.

I am dreading September as the whole school refusal thing will start again.

They are with CAHMS, have had/having therapy. I'm in therapy. I'm on meds. They're on meds.

The whole fucking thing is just impossible and Its just getting harder and harder as they get older and I feel like a total fucking failure as a parent in so many ways and I can't ever see us living normal lives and I just do not want to live like this any more.

I wasn't a bad parent, I'mnot now but I'mfinding it harder and harder to cope.
It was easy when they were little then bad things happened and genetics kicked in at puberty too maybe? Covid isolated them all and just killed the small amount of social integration they had. They lost confidence and there was no way to keep that socialising going.

Its all my fault. Its all gone so wrong and now everyone is sad constantly. I wish I would have killed myself before I had any of them. It would have saved them all so much pain and suffering. I know that is horrific to say but I feel like I have brought them here to just suffer.

What the fuck is in this world for ND kids like them who have trauma and extreme mental health issues?? Everyone just sees them as lazy and a burden to the tax payer if they apply for benefits but who is going to hire them when they can barely attend an interview and cannot present themselves in a 'normal' manner.
Of course an employer is going to choose the confident, social person over my child again and again. And there is so much competition for a job now. There is no social housing and private rent is stupid high.
I can't see them moving out.

I just don't know what to do at all.

I didnt sign up for this. I didn't know it would be like this.

I love them so much and I am so scared about the future

JoMumsnet · 26/08/2026 19:17

Hi LittleWhiteDogWithABlueBowtie,

We're sorry everything's so difficult right now. We can see you're already getting some good support on this thread from other Mumsnetters, but we just wanted to add a few links which might be of help.

Here's a link to our general Mental Health webguide which lists lots of organisations which can provide some real life support.

If you're feeling really low, please call the Samaritans on 116 123. You can also go to the Samaritans website, or email them on [email protected].

If you find texting easier, please take a look at Shout's website. Shout 85258 is a free, confidential, anonymous text support service. Its trained volunteers are available all hours of the day and night to listen and support you to get to a calmer and safe place.

Here too is a link to Mind's support page which has tips for coping while caring for others which can help when you're feeling overwhelmed.

We hope things start getting a bit easier for you soon.

Mental Health Webguide | Mumsnet

A guide to information and services related to mental health support. Find reliable organisations and support services here.

https://www.mumsnet.com/i/mental-health-webguide

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