Struggling with constant noise from next door during the school holidays

[Anxiousandfedup]

Hello! I've name changed as this could out me.

Its one about noisy children next door.

I know it's the school holidays, i know children are going to be out playing and they're going to be noisy. I have 2 children myself (they're grown up now).

What I'm finding hard is that the children next door are on another level of noisy. They have friends at the bottom of the garden and the neighbours have put ladders up against the fence so that their children (aged 5 and 8), can climb up and talk to the boy who lives at the bottom of their garden. But they don't talk, they shout, the boy constantly shouting their names, we counted 22 times just in the space of 5 minutes, this goes on multiple times a day. Then there's the falling out, screaming like a limb has been chopped off, whinging, whining, crying, it's constant! So we can't enjoy sitting outside.

They have friends round (children) (we share a party wall where their stairs runs up the party wall), and the children thunder up and down the stairs. I'm not talking just a light footstep that's tolerable normal household noise, I'm talking multiple bowling ball type noise being thrown down the stairs, the internal doors being slammed, so if I'm trying to chill in my front room the noise frightens me and my anxiety shoots through the roof, I end up feeling physically sick and instant headache. I have ear plugs, but don't want to be wearing them if I'm watching TV. So I'm also anxious sitting inside.

I have spoken to my neighbour about the noise, so they know we can hear them, but it's like they don't care.

On paper as neighbours we should get on, but I'm finding that I hate them. They're destroying my peace, my safe haven. The noise feels intrusive. I feel very tearful about it. And the only option is to move, but we can't afford it and I need to sort my health out.

It's like my neighbours just don't care.

They had building work for 3 months through Nov, Dec, Jan and Feb. I had a major operation, did I complain? No i didn't. I understood that they were having building work done and to suck it up, even though the noise was horrendous and I was trapped due to the nature of my operation. I thought they might come round to see how i was, you know try to keep up neighbourly relations, but no, they couldn't care less.

I'm going to have another big operation in a couple of weeks (which they know about) and I'm dreading it because I'll be trapped in my house for a couple of weeks. And the children will be left doing a rendition of Lord of the flies while the mum sits outside with her friend completely oblivious, drinking from her sippy cup. We've always been very good considerate neighbours, it's a shame they can't do the same for us.

The petty part of me wants to sell the house and hope that they end up with neighbours from hell, so then they'll know how it feels.

I suppose I'm offloading and having a bit of a rant.

Thank you to anyone who read all of this, i just needed to get it off my chest.

I feel you @Anxiousandfedup but all you'll get on here is nasty selfish people telling you that children are allowed to scream and shout and behave like feral brats. We have all of the above plus about 6 dogs who get set off every time a kid screams.
Noise cancelling headphones is the way to go apparently.

I'm sorry OP it sounds like an unreasonable level of noise if it's all day. Have you spoken to the parents of the boy at the bottom of the garden too?
Is it more the outside or inside noise that is getting to you?

I know I'm going to get people telling me it's what kids do. But mine never did, I was extremely thoughtful to my neighbours and understood that everyone had an entitlement to enjoy their gardens.

I'm sorry you're in the same situation, it sucks!

Some people say playing classical/jazz music helps.

Honestly it's the inside noise that gets to me, if they're outside at least I can shut the doors and windows and block the noise out. The inside noise literally sounds like it's in the same room as me, it's sudden and it frightens me, my fight or flight kicks in, and I'm a mess (I have cptsd caused by being raised in an abusive household). And I haven't had a word with the parents at the bottom of the garden because I don't want to be known as the moaning neighbour.

@Anxiousandfedup we have an adjoining wall but our stairs are on the outside walls, we still hear them walking round their house plus we have terraced gardens so I'm always telling my children to be mindful of their noise outside. Non of our neighbours have ever complained but I don't want them to need to.

Can you re-arrange your house in any way to move away from that wall? I appreciate it's not what you should have to do but if your due an operation in the coming weeks it's more about maintaining any peace you can inside. Is there any sound proofing you could do, it's much cheaper than moving and although isn't an instant fix would give you peace inside at least.
The garden whilst they are still unreasonable for shouting and screaming without any input to be considerate, can be more expected and can be down to peoples personal tolerating levels, so shutting the windows and doors is probably your only option in the short term.

I wish I could rearrange the house, but our whole living room and dining area is on that wall. When they're moving around the house they make what I would call normal tolerable household noise, and i know I can't complain about that, we hear them close their front door, we hear their washing machine, we hear most times light footsteps up their stairs and the odd bang of an internal door, but we don't complain about that, I understand it's normal household noise.

It's when they have friends round, which during the holidays is most days and the children thunder up and down the stairs, i don't understand why the parents don't tell them to walk up the stairs normally, then there's slamming doors, it's like the children use the house as a race track/ playground with no consideration for us, their neighbours.

There's a park across the road, why don't they take the children there to blow off some steam, let them run around, play football, shout and scream, but no the mum sits in the garden oblivious to the pain and suffering her family is causing to the neighbours around them, and it's not just me as a neighbour that's fed up, all my neighbours have made comments about how they feel sorry for us. The boy has shouted my neighbours daughter right now 18 times and counting! What are the parents doing!!!!