Different inheritance for each child

[FredaMountfitchet]

What’s your thoughts on leaving different inheritance to your children?
Scenario 2 sisters one being left the family home value circa £180000 other sister being left ‘some cash ‘ may be £80000 may be nothing if all used up by the time the parent deceased .

If I were that sister, I'd just cut contact with the lot of them.

Always divide equally. What is now may not be tomorrow- people can divorce, lose their job, develop and illness, remarry into wealth etc etc. There are circumstances where a child may get less, but I don’t see it here.

The parents could do an equity release plan to equal it out. Eg if total assets £260k, leave one £130k cash and the other house with mortgage

No, equal split is the only fair way to do it

Some European countries, I believe, have inheritance rules which forbid children being left out of inheritence. I guess this avoids the problem that inevitably situations change post the parental deaths and what may have seemed fair at the time of writing a will, ends up being anything but.

So, my friend's brother, would not be able to inherit all their parents' estate - the business in which he worked with his parents ( seemed fair) and the parent's home while my ( female) friend got nothing.

The parents didn't/couldn't know of course that she would soon divorce, return from Europe where she couldn't work for many years, to no job and 3 children. I presume they thought she had a good set up? She was destitute. Her ex has remarried and doesn't see her or the, now adult, children. They are unlikely to inherit anything from their father.

Forever grateful that can't hapoen wheremy family is and all must be shared equally except few extreme cases...
I don't understood this system which just seems to build up tons of resentment everywhere.

I would take this case of your friend as essentially a punishment for trying their bestand doing well if it was me. Even though no one should expect inheritance (rightfully so), this is just crap.

Clearly very bored Zelda

Incidentally some countries allow you to choose the system under which you marry eg France I believe. So you can marry with 'separation des biens'. If you split you get nothing from your spouse or ( communite des biens - joint estate so its split evenly .)
Some countries will not allow a foreign spouse to inherit property if the marriage fails. Turkey I think eg.)

Leaving an unequal inheritance is generally a terrible idea and a recipe for disaster.

I know some of the people who do it seem to see it as "evening things up" between siblings but that rarely works. It is much more likely to cause lasting resentment and rifts that never heal.

It isn’t fair.

The circumstances of the two sisters could change, and their fortunes be reversed. What then?

They can’t estimate what the family home will be worth by the time they die so how will they know how much to set aside for sister 2?

What if either of them needs to go into care?

Sister 1 is enjoying the current benefits of the property whilst sister 2 has to wait.

I’ve seen this scenario more than once, sadly. It’s a classic. And it never works out.

In my DH's family everything is split evenly. In mine, the money goes to those who need it most - and the latter includes those who make bad financial and employment decisions, because the lack of critical thinking and planning can be seen as a sort of disability is my family. I'm equally happy with both of these positions.

Are you talking about inheritance though, or everyday support?

This reads as if we are missing some info.
Also sounds like the sibling who lives nearby has been actively supporting, running errands, providing care for a number of years. Perhaps this, in combination with the fact the other sibling has been less of a support and is in a better financial position is acknowledgement, but still a considerable inheritance for both?

We are doing an unequal inheritance but we have discussed it with our children, they should all get 20% but have agreed to surrender 5% each for the one child that has autism. So we will be doing 15/15/15/15/40. We think it's fair as she will not have the life chances the others will have. I think as long as it is discussed and justified within the family it's ok but just leaving it without an explanation or a good reason is really wicked and will likely rob siblings of their future friendship with one another.

When my dim died she left no will. The dd she lived with claimed everything. The other dd got nil. When that dd died single and childless the only relative(me ) got 10k and her carer a 375k house filled with my family's antiques. Aunts wishes but not sure how the carer slept nights.

I think I would take this as you love one child more. I’d find it terrible to be in position of getting less. Like I was less loved. Circumstances change too. You don’t know what the future might bring.

Both.

And I don't feel less loved. I know my family respect me and are proud of me, and I've often felt like the more loved of the children, if anything.

As someone who was shat upon inheritance wise by my mother (for bringing shame upon her by getting divorced) it's not a good idea to leave an unequal split. I barely speak to my sister now.

Some siblings have worked hard to achieve more, others may have not. Those who have done better shouldn't be punished.

If your mum died without a will it should've been split equally. You can't just claim a house. DD couldn't have transferred ownership, you need proof.

Horribly unfair to treat someone so unequally for doing well in their life. No one knows what’s around the corner. What if the person was to get sick or had a sick child and could have used the inheritance money for medical treatment?