Would this be an appropriate babysitting suggestion, and what would you expect to pay?

[Sadgirl101]

Background, 2 kids 4 and 8. Both mild SEN needs but not overly challenging kids, once you know their little quirks and routines.

I'm a newly single parent and I'm lucky with my childcare options/support, but I'm utilising it all for work and then feel like I can't ask again to get out and socialise. I have spoken to a few local babysitters who do it as a career and while I'm sure they are all super at what they donand I agree they absolutely deserve fair renumeration, despite being a registered nurse they are quoting is more than my take home salary if you worked it out as an hourly rate and I just cant justify it.

We live in a small set of flats, but they are split level if that makes sense so each flat is separated by about 6 steps and are on alternate sides of the building, so if you stood at my front door, you could see the front door of both my upper and lower neighbours.

Upstairs has a 16yo DD. I was wondering about asking if she would be interested, on the basis that her dad is literally shouting distance if she needed anything or there was an emergency or whatever. For someone at that age, what would be the latest it would be reasonable to expect her to stay? Would 1am be too late, for example? I did think I could offer for her to sleep in my room (to give her a bit more privacy) and then whenever I got in I could sleep on the sofa bed in the living room, but I don't know if that's an inappropriate suggestion for a 16yo?

Also what would be the going rate for a 16yo babysitter?

I think her sleeping in your room would be super weird! I think 1am is OK, she could always doze on the sofa, that's what I used to do when I babysat in my youth. I'd probably say 8-10 pounds an hour but it depends where you are

no harm in asking. I’ve had 16 year old babysitters before and paid £15/hr. I’ve never stayed out as late as 1am with a sitter. 11/13 usually. But mainly because that’s my bed time..

I would say that’s all absolutely fine but give her the sofa bed .. !

I used to pay my babysitter £5 an hour if I was just out for a few hours (home by midnight situation) Overnight I tend to do flat rate £100 plus cash for takeaway and I stay out. I don’t do that often only for weddings if he can’t sleep over at a friends but it’s just so I know there is a responsible adult in the house. My babysitters are now uni students whose parents I’m friends with and don’t mind an easy job of staying over with a teenager who they won’t see unless it’s due to wanting food. It’s only so someone is on hand for an emergency in the night.

If she lives in a flat a few steps from yours why would she need to sleep in your bed? That would be a bit weird. I think 1am might be a bit late, I’d suggest no later than midnight, at least till you are all happy with the arrangement.

8-12 I’d suggest £30 and leave her snacks. More if you think she’d need to put them to bed or deal with awake children.

Ok thanks for the comments, the logic behind giving her my room rather than the sofa is that my kids often wake early and will head into the living room and I thought she might not appreciate being woken up by my kids but like others have said, I guess she could doze on the sofa and then just go home when I'm back!

I think a random 16 year old babysitter they don’t know well, over night, particularly when they are both SEN seems absolutely crazy imo.

@MakeMineAMilkyTea I used to pay my babysitter £5 an hour

15 years ago?!

I would start off with a short evening, 7-10pm maybe, before extending it later. Make sure they get on well and are comfortable with each other. 1am, possibly, depends on the 16yo, but I would expect to pay more past about 11. Around here it's about 8-10 an hour.

When I used to babysit as a teen(admittedly, a long time ago!) my neighbour used to stumble home in the early hours and give me a fiver for the whole night(that was tight even then). I didn’t have the confidence to tell her she was taking the piss. Please don’t take advantage of your neighbour just because she’s a kid, make sure you pay her a fair hourly rate.

If you expect her to stay the night, you should pay her more. 1am sounds too late to keep a 16 year old up, 12 would be OK. I think £10 an hour is about right.

I thought it was a given that if she was interested we would invest some time in making sure they got to know each other first and wouldn't be launching straight into an overnight!

I babysat when I was around that age (so around 25 years ago!) and got paid £30-40 if they were back before midnight (from about 7.30pm) and if they were home later (around 1pm) then it was more like £50-60.
They also paid for a taxi home!
They were also 3 and 5 when I first started so literally would go to bed when I got there, I would sometimes just give the little one some milk first. Make sure they cleaned their teeth then that was it they went to bed and I read them a story.

I think as your children are older (and sen) it might not be such an easy task, especially for an inexperienced 16 year old.