Mothers with autistic children..

[frenchu]

So my son is 16 months old. I’ve noticed recently compared to peers he doesn’t say any words. He can say mama and dada and can repeat sounds such as roarrr. He is very loud and always babbling
he was a little delayed in sitting crawling and walking but has caught up now (started walking 2w ago)
he doesn’t point, wave or do any hand gestures apart from clap. He understands some instructions like ‘come here’ , ‘clap for mummy’ ‘stand up’. He doesn’t answer his name no matter how many times you call him. he’s very affectionate, gives everyone cuddles unprovoked. He does things for a reaction for example puts sunglasses on and stands near me so I can praise him. He’s very sociable and plays well with peers. He flaps his hands, covers his ears and shakes his head loads every day. He only eats certain foods, he’s very funny with textures so won’t eat things like pasta , fruit or veg (not just toddler fussiness I’ve offered them every meal since 6m and he touches them and throws on floor) he has good eye contact and engages with me playing peekaboo, row row your boat etc.
today nursery have asked me to contact my HV for a developmental review especially highlighting his communication (I have done this just waiting for them to book me in)
I have thought myself that he may be behind as he doesn’t answer me or say any words, point at thing he wants etc but I thought just like walking he might’ve caught up later on. After researching it’s seeming that these could be autism traits.
i feel a little upset this evening, both of my brothers have autism and really struggled growing up and I’m sure no parent wants their child to struggle.
any advice? Does this seem likely? Is he too young to
tell? Is there anything we can do to support him?
thanks!

With a strong family history and enough symptoms at 16 months to raise independent concerns it is very possible that your DS will eventually receive an autism diagnosis.

However,
a) he will continue to grow and change, so specific things he struggles with as a baby may well still appear later.
b) society is much better-informed about autism and how to support it now than when your brothers were young.

However - if he is autistic you will need to be well informed (so you can provide specific support with the education system, with social skills/therapies/DLA if necessary, and keeping an eye out for co-occurring conditions as he develops), I'd recommend joining some SEND facebook groups and starting to read around the subject asap. In particular ensuring he has a safe space (within his own control, where he can be himself safely) at home will be important.

You are doing the right thing by arranging a developmental review, as the communication and sensory differences you describe deserve proper discussion. Autism Detect also offers an initial screening consultation, which may help you decide whether a full assessment would be worthwhile. It could offer a clear and affordable first step while you are waiting.

Yes, it sounds like he's autistic.
It's highly genetic.
Also some people with autism can maintain decent eye contact, so that's not always a good marker of autism.
Signs of autism can be seen as early as 12 months old.
Yes, I would chase up a developmental review.

Autism is genetic. You may have undiagnosed autism yourself. I didnt know i did until one of my kids was diagnosed. Autism isnt always terrible. I have one child who is profoundly autiatic with learning disabilities and one who is autistic and verbal. The verbal one worried me sick until she was 4, I thought she would have all kinds of problems, she was 1:1 at her nursery and still in pulls ups full time when she started reception year. Shes nearly 10 now and needs no extra support in school and is doing fab. She recently went on on a school residential. She is quirky and has sensory needs and very sensitive but shes thriving and in mainstream. At 16 months its too early to know how complex your child will be later. My profoundly autistic daughter was a much easier toddler than her sister with less symptoms! Try not to worry (I know thats hard) because your anxiety wont make any difference to the outcome x

Thanks all! My husband has adhd and asd but was always ahead on milestones as a child and his traits always lead back to adhd more than asd so we wasn’t sure with the lack of words and the stimming as my husband didn’t have any of that - he leads a normal independent life today but struggled profusely growing up and especially in school despite going to an SEN school. Autism does run in my family, mainly in the boys - I’ve never seen traits in myself personally although I get extremely overstimulated with noise but I’ve always been the same, I remember holding my ears as a child when we went out because of the sounds of cars😆 and I am fussy with textures of food also but that’s it, nothing that screams at me that I could be autistic. I’m very worried I must admit, just felt so deeply sad last night I think mainly because if he is autistic , he’s far too young to tell how it will affect him now. I keep thinking what if he becomes non verbals and I don’t hear his voice again?and the thought of my child having school difficulties, social difficulties etc makes me very sad. He is our whole world and a very happy little boy - I also think baby no2 will now be off the cards for a long time as I’ll need to assess his needs before throwing another in the mix! Seeing my mother juggle 2 autistic children I know just how hard it can be , one of my brothers is non verbal and the other never integrated in to society at all throughout his life and struggled with absolutely everything.

anyway! Thanks for being there and taking the time to reply to my post.