Like how hard is it, 3 kids?

[jinn2025]

I think I want another baby, hubs not so sure 😂 we have a 2 DDs 4 and 1

I’ve got a bigger gap with 7.5, 5.5 years and 10 months. We love it and are really happy. Baby has absolutely lit up our lives. The juggling is hard at times. I think the age and temperament of older children as well as work/childcare arrangements will influence things a lot.

We have 3, currently aged 11, 8 and 3. I won't lie, it is relentless! It is a juggle meeting everyone's needs, and it came as a surprise to me that children need you more as they get older. Don't underestimate that you can no longer divide and conquer. One parent always has 2, which usually means prioritising one whilst the other is dragged around. Bit it is lovely. We had a boy after 2 girls so it has been a whole different experience and we are very grateful.

When they are young - lovely! Lots of joy. But honestly raising kids/teens these days seems especially hard. So many with struggles and additional needs, so many that find the school system difficult in some way. Rates of anxiety, mental health issues, all the stuff around social media. The expense of uni. The difficulty with getting jobs, and getting on the housing ladder. The fact that many need support beyond childhood and into adulthood.
i think it would be better to focus on the two you have as you just don’t know what the term years will hold. I’m finding it very very tough (they’re 18, 14, 10 currently)

I had a 2 and 4 year old when baby number 3 arrived. It was very busy and non stop for a few years but I dont regret it!

Oh it’s bonkers and mad and a logistical nightmare

but So Much Love…

Mine are now 14,11 and 9. Was v v busy when they were all under 7 but definitely calmer now! Oldest has Down Syndrome and is autistic so 3 typical children would obviously be different(easier I presume).
I always knew I'd have more than 2, had originally thought 4 but 3 was the right point to stop for us

I wouldn’t. But for practicality reasons. Cars, hotel rooms, finances, time constraints, being unable to divide and conquer.
A few of my family and friends have had their third in the last few years and I will say it’s tipped the balance for most of them. The children are, of course, loved beyond measure but it’s suddenly much harder.
It’s a heart vs head scenario

Most people with 3 or more will say “madness but we love it” but what they really mean is “madness but we have no choice” IMO. We have 3. I didn’t contemplate how hard it would be as they get older in school and need support. When they were babies I could fulfil their needs - food, warmth, clothing, shelter. As they get older it’s much much harder to fulfil their needs and having 3 just means I’m spread more thinly than I’d like. It’s costly too and travelling is more stressful.

Mine are 17, 15 and 11 and I wouldn't have it any other way 😊honestly, the transition from two to three was so easy compared to 0-1 or 1-2. It is full on but I love the chaos!

I think this thread illustrates that it's completely different for each individual family. I certainly didn't find going from 2-3 the easiest, actually probably the hardest on a practical level - like someone else said, even when both parents are there, divide and conquer is no longer possible / as effective. Mine are 8, 4 and 1, so I know some bits will get easier as the younger ones age, but I am also aware we will be heading to new challenges with the eldest one in a few years time. So, it will always be a juggle. I'm one of 3 myself though and as adults we are all very close.

Slightly dysfunctional, mostly chaotic. A whole lot of loved and competing needs and voices. Mine were 7 and 4 when the baby came along. The baby years were joyful. Toddler years were fun watching the blend of personalities.

Goodwill childcare opportunities are fewer. Getting taxis as a family of 5 is a nightmare as are airport runs. Cost of living bites!

But I wouldn’t change a thing. The family dynamic is so fun. The interactions hilarious. The missing piece of a jigsaw we don’t even know was missing! X

I have four under seven, but I don’t work and have plenty of support and resources.

I love it and would happily have another two…

Relentless and chaotic

A lot of it must come down to your own character, your 'village' of support and your financial situation.

I know I would not cope as the loveable chaos would wear me down. I am a husk of the person I was pre kids!