WIA, & would I be to pull out of fete?

[photogdrama]

Last week was DS’s first sports day, but I only found out about the drama this morning.

DS1 is in reception. He’s in a small school so years are combined, and there’s a parent WhatsApp group for each combined class.

I’m a bit of an amateur photographer. Mostly my own kids and dog etc, but I do enjoy it and I think I’m pretty good if I do say so myself.

I took my camera to sports day to take photos of DS. No restrictions, and most parents were taking photos of their kids on their phones etc. I thought it would be nice to take some shots of their kids other kids in DS’s class, and I later shared them on the WhatsApp group. Photos from birthday parties are often shared, so again no problems there, is so I thought.

This morning at drop off DS’s teacher pulled me aside and said they’d had a “complaint” about the sports day photo I shared. From what I could gather, the complaint was that if I wasn’t going to take photos of every kid in the school, I shouldn’t do it at all.

I spoke to another mum about this as I was really quite surprised at this. She thinks the complainant is a parent whose child has moved up to the next class, but she has stayed in the reception/year 1 WhatsApp group for some reason (she is still quite active in the group and seems to like to be seen as the school queen bee).

I have to say I feel quite resentful that I had a knuckle rapping for this. I had agreed to take photos of the dog show at the school fete at the weekend but I’m tempted now to say no! Is that petty and spiteful?!

I wouldn’t, but I am also petty.

ask for payment in future

Did you ask the parents/did the parents ask you to take the photos? Or did you just take them and share them? I think it’s a bit odd to be honest unless everyone was sharing photos of other people’s children and the school said this was permitted, especially if there are children with safeguarding considerations who shouldn’t have their photos shared. I’m not sure I’d want another parent taking photos of my child and sharing them.

You shouldn't be taking photos of anyone's kids without their express permission anyway.

Regarding the dog show, they'll be fine using their phone cameras so don't worry about it.

Is the complaint that somebody wanted a photo taken and didn't have one, rather than objecting to photos of the DC being taken?

I think what you’ve done is fine and perfectly normal. But normally they get shared privately unless it’s group shots. In which case I can’t understand why anyone has complained.
I wouldn’t over think it. You would be petty to pull out of the fete. Take the moral high ground, ignore it, and crack on.

It is a weird complaint.

However I agree you are on dodgy grounds sharing photos of other kids on social media (and you don't know where they go after that).

In particular I wouldn't have been happy as we had a strict no online photos for my adopted DDs.

Still take photos of the dog show.

I would be very careful about putting photographs of other people's children on WhatsApp groups - in fact I just wouldn't do it.
As for the dog show, I imagine the people taking part would have to agree to their photos being taken - the class winners etc. I would still do that as I try not to be petty.

Unfortunately, OP, it would be petty and spiteful not to take pics at the dog show, but I’d sure as hell only take photos of my DC in future. Sadly, there’s always one who spoils it for everyone else.

I'm the school's events photographer at our school. I wouldn't ever just share one or two photos of specific people. This is one of those jobs where you either need to go "all in" and go out of your way to try and represent everyone, or just stick to photographing your own kids. At some events, I don't share my photos/videos in the class groups because I only got decent shots of 1-2 kids and parents are very entitled and will complain. A lot of the time they won't understand that you're not getting paid for this, they just see a camera and make assumptions.
I volunteer to photograph loads of events because I'm trying to improve my events photography before hopefully quitting teaching and moving into paid photography as a business, but sometimes I'm just at an event to take pics of my own kids (who also attend the school). Also as a PP said, you really have to be careful of which kids have permission for photos to be shared before sharing photos. The school obviously can't control who you photograph but if you're sharing it in class groups you need to be aware or check with someone.

I would be pulling out.

Dear Ms X
Following the conversation with Ms X on day X, I am writing to inform you that I will no longer be offering my photography services at the upcoming fete, nor at any further school events.
Please note that I don't take kindly to being reprimanded over something that was intended as a kind hearted gesture. This served no purpose other than to make me feel small at drop off and I will not be tolerating this in future.
Yours sincerely

So they complained that their child wasn’t photographed? What a weird complaint.

was the WhatsApp group a closed school one? If not, I’m surprised that people accepted the photographs being posted, although you did say there were no restrictions.

It's not petty at all. Decline the dog show thing and if anyone asks why, tell them that you are only an amateur photographer, and you are pissed off that someone has complained about you not including all children last time. So from now on you will only be taking photos of your own family and pets in future.

Fuck 'em.

By the way, I wouldn't have shared any photos of children that weren't mine unless I'd got permission from their parents first.

I think you post on the what's app group:

Apparently someone has complained to the school I didn't take photos of their child at sports day. I would like to point out that I was there purely as a parent and not in any official, nor paid, capacity.

But still do the fair.

Personally i'd pull out of photographing the dog show incase you miss snapping a pic of a dog or two, then you'll be in hot water AGAIN 😅

Thanks all.

I do take on board it could be dodgy to take photos of other people’s kids without consent, and share them to a WhatsApp group etc. But just to clarify, it is a closed group just for parents of the kids in the class (well, it’s meant to be). As the kids move through the school, you leave the old group and join the new group if you see what I mean. However, there do seem to be a couple of hangers on whose kids are now in the next class up but they haven’t left the chat.

The group is mainly used for school info and reminders, birthday invitations, heads up for park visits if anyone wants to join etc.

Plenty of parents have shared photos of the kids from birthday parties & the like, and “consent” wasn’t sought for this but it hasn’t been a problem, so that’s why I thought it would be okay on sports day.

Yep, the crux of the complaint seemed to be it wasn’t fair I didn’t take photos of every kid in the school, not that I took them in the first place. Just seems a bit batshit that the complaint was made, & that the school felt they had to raise it with me. I wasn’t told I couldn’t take photos at school events, unless told otherwise at particular ones.

I think this is reasonable. Point out the injustice but sit take the high road and do the dog show/fair.

But make sure you tell everyone (in the WhatsApp and on the day, loudly ) that these photos are not paid for and you’re doing it to help out.

I probably will do the fair. But if complaining parent wants a photo of their dog then I’m going to make sure it’s a bit shit!

The mum I spoke to about it has already managed to get it round the school and I’ve already had some private messages from parents thanking me for the sports day pics and letting me know they have no issue with it! I am going to be more careful into the future though.

These type of things have a habit of becoming regular occurrences and nipping it in the bud at the start and walking away is the only way to go about it.

I wouldn’t do the dog show. Your card has been marked and they feel comfortable now in berating you for not doing something

You should never have been told of the complaint the HT should have immediately shut this woman down and pointed out that you were not the schools photographer you were just a mum photographing her child and others in her group

I think that any parent who didn’t see at least one photo of their child taken by every other parent there that day should complain about all the other parents

I would tell the HT that this woman didn’t take a picture of your child so you are making a complaint about her.

I wouldn’t want to deal with people who don’t have your back

You shouldn’t have to be more careful

It takes the fun out of things

They’re not very nice and you didn’t do anything wrong. This doesn’t seem to be an issue around consent as lots of people are suggesting, as you did mention that in u our first post and subsequently said the group often posts photos. I think it would be a shame if you did not do the dog show but I would make I absolutely clear, cc’ing as many people as possible, that the onus is on the organisers to make sure you get the shots, not you.

The school allow photos at sports day? So why on earth did the head teacher feel able to relay this complaint to you?? Why didn’t she tell the complainer “we allow parents to take pictures, we don’t tell them what to photograph.” Reading the OP I thought the complaint would be about taking/sharing pics of other children, which would be valid. The actual complaint is clearly absolutely ridiculous!
I’d pull out of the fete for because the school backed the complainer on this issue and I wouldn’t want to deal with whatever other nonsense complaints they might also decide to pass on.

Yes, definitely do the dogs! The sports day all sounds a bit off, but that's the world we live in.

While it seems that the complainant was malicious, I wouldn't take pictures of other people's kids and post them on a WhatsApp group, even if others do. I might take photos of specific friends children and share those with my friends directly. But taking pictures of children who's parents you don't know well is unwise.

I would still do the dog show and make sure I got a picture of every dog! Presumably you would give these to the school rather than individual owners?