can we afford to have a child?

[simpls]

how do people in Scotland do childcare?

I am TTC and just starting to understand the things I need to get ready. I am 30.

I am about to buy a two bed home and upgrade. It's talking all our savings but there's just so little space in a one bed and we're unhappy.

My mortgage will be £900 a month.

Childcare will be £1500 a month for my local nursery (if we get a place)

Twins run in my family and tend to skip a generation (my mum was a twin!) What do parents of multiples do?

DP earns £32k with two weeks of paternity and no opportunity for flexibility. He works solid 9-5 but is expected to overtime.

Second last financial year I earned £45k as a contractor and spent it all on rennovations! Last financial year I earned £22k as a contractor sole trader (used to be more and can pick up quickly) but no maternity leave. So no income if I stop for 6-9 months and will need a run way of no income while I apply for contracts again.

My work is in a niche type of events so there is no flexibility. Alot of the work falls on weekends, evenings, but can also be any day of the week, so I can't take an extra day off for childcare as I would lose contracts with that lack of availability.

When I lost contracts over the last year I panicked and started trying to get a job and got to final stage 4 times, but wasn't chosen. So I need to keep plugging away with my work.

No willing and supportive family in the area.

Can we make this work?

So he’s spending almost the food budget again on protein powders 500/400

you have things you can reduce /syop /cut back

I would consider extra money (maybe part of your £500) for things you may not anticipate.

For example, i didn’t anticipate that breastfeeding wouldn’t work for me. Formula is bloody expensive.

I also didn’t anticipate that both my kids would need private surgery as NHS let them down.

I would also say consider a couple of years in the future, when days out and activities cost a lot. Even soft play can cost a lot.

The question is can you live off your partners income. That’s a no . So you need to build some savings first I think however on his income alone you may be entitled to benefits.

Can he get a better job? He seems to spend a large portion of the earnings on himself.

Op, you seem to have little to nothing to spend on yourself, but your partner has a very expensive lifestyle. What sort of injury did he have where he needs so much,

There is never a right time to have a child. You just do what you need to do. How will you feel hardly seeing said child mon to fri though once they are in childcare settings and school? As a mother there is an emotional toll and on the child as well.

What did I just read, you can’t be serious. Surely the world has moved on from this old dated stereotypical view.

If you can’t afford a haircut more than twice a year then I don’t think your budget will stretch to a baby.

ETA: not that you need a haircut more than twice a year but you’ve used that as an example of spending you can’t afford.

but the emotional toll has not moved on... she will only see her child in the evenings 2 months a year? Or did I misread that ? Appologies if I did lol

It was clearly a typo lol where would she go for ten months a year 😂

She meant he will be there every evening and weekend apart from two months a year when he can’t do evenings as he will be busy,

the dh obviously... The father lol

you are misquoting what I said though, evenings not the full 10 months lol

id focus on saving for a couple of years so you have decent buffer, before TTC. You’re only 30, no rush.

Are you ok? Like seriously.

ok... well then I may have misunderstood.

are you ? lol, no need to be a mean stranger on the internet...I know how much my kids demand my time and attention to function so I assume the child will need its mum.

Would you be entitled to any universal credit if it’s just your partners salary of 32K and child benefit (assume they are both a thing in Scotland)

Yes UC and child benefit are both a thing in Scotland.

On a salary of £32k, assuming a monthly take home of around £2200, that would be a UC amount of approximately £150. But they wouldn't be entitled to claim any childcare costs if only one of them was working.

If they were receiving UC, they would also be entitled to Scottish Child Payment which is £28.20 per week.

Just have the child , bring it into this shit show of a world

To be perfectly honest @simpls if your dp has mh problems now and needs not insignificant spends for the sake of it now, it will be worse when a baby comes.

I suspect if you have a baby, you won't have a dp for long afterwards.

Have a baby and you will be very skint and there will be nothing left for treats. I'd forget the baby for now and see how much you can save.

Apart from the financial aspect and I agree with others that your DP is taking a big chunk of the budget for himself every month if your work is inflexible then what is the plan for if you need to keep a child off nursery/school?

thats my point exactly, mum needs to be around more for child. Child needs her/his mum around in especially the younger formative years. A rigid mon to fri work plan that goes that late is going to struggle with a baby/ pre teen child in general.

You will get cc vouchers though

Gym for mental health - I get that
Fancy gym plus dietary supplements - unnecessary luxury
Running club - considerably cheaper,
Gym with pool - absolutely brilliant with small children