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Discuss horse riding and ownership on our Horse forum.

Original poster

Talk me out of buying a pony for a toddler

26 replies

AwkwardPaws27 · 17/02/2025 13:17

DS (2y8m) has been riding a Shetland once a week for a couple of months. The pony is only 5 and relatively recently backed, but a really lovely nature and developing into a very nice lead rein pony. The pony has done a lot of inhand showing with his current owner & this is her passion, so I know she does plan to sell him as a lead rein pony at some point.

I woke up at 5am and couldn't get back to sleep as I was thinking about buying the pony. Obviously DS is tiny, & may lose interest. Pony is young & I'm too big to get on & school him myself if we discover/develop any quirks. I've had shares in the past but never owned, so while I can do the day to day care I'm not that experienced, & I've never had to manage laminitis (which I know shetlands can be prone too). Pony is a Shetland and while currently lovely, may morph into a Shitland...

I'd be mad to consider it, wouldn't I? I've got visions of a lovely muddy pony-filled childhood for DS but I may be trying to live out my own childhood dreams...

OP posts:
Icanttakethisanymore · 17/02/2025 13:23

Hmmm - would it be kept at a livery yard or at home?

I'd say this is probably less of a big deal if you already had a horse yourself and were therefore already committed to the routine of yard visits etc. Feels like a big commitment for such a young child, unless you are happy looking after the pony regardless of how interested your LB turns out to be.

Ariela · 17/02/2025 13:45

I'd carry on with the once a week and see how you get on. Maybe if the owner is OK with it and you've suitable transport you could join Pony Club and meet other similar aged tots on smallest ponies, and ultimately find a good hand-me-down looking for a share/home/regular rider.

Spirallingdownwards · 17/02/2025 13:47

Don't buy a pony for a toddler.

NormalAuntFanny · 17/02/2025 13:47

He's just waiting for you to buy him before revealing his demonic side ;-)

I do regret not having a horse when the kids were little and we had space in the country but under 3 is a big gamble especially as you can't ride him yourself.

Are there other DC's who might ride too??

Maxorias · 17/02/2025 13:48

Yeah sorry I think it's way too early. Carry on with weekly lessons. If your DC is still keen in a few years that would make more sense then.

Maxorias · 17/02/2025 13:50

I mean, if you owned the poney would your dc ride more often than once or biweekly ? If not, it's really really not worth it.

If you reach a point at which the dc is keen to ride multiples times a week and is responsible enough to do at least some of the care (cleaning the hooves, taking care of the tack, rubbing the horse after work out, feeding the horse, etc) is when it would make sense. If you can afford it comfortably.

Original poster
AwkwardPaws27 · 17/02/2025 14:00

Icanttakethisanymore · 17/02/2025 13:23

Hmmm - would it be kept at a livery yard or at home?

I'd say this is probably less of a big deal if you already had a horse yourself and were therefore already committed to the routine of yard visits etc. Feels like a big commitment for such a young child, unless you are happy looking after the pony regardless of how interested your LB turns out to be.

Livery yard (although I'd have to find one, as currently pony is on owners sole use yard). I'd probably do part-livery / use some services i.e. feed and turnout in the morning so I'd visit once a day.

OP posts:
Original poster
AwkwardPaws27 · 17/02/2025 14:01

Ariela · 17/02/2025 13:45

I'd carry on with the once a week and see how you get on. Maybe if the owner is OK with it and you've suitable transport you could join Pony Club and meet other similar aged tots on smallest ponies, and ultimately find a good hand-me-down looking for a share/home/regular rider.

That's a good suggestion - I'll see if I can find out what age they can start pony club.

OP posts:
Original poster
AwkwardPaws27 · 17/02/2025 14:02

Spirallingdownwards · 17/02/2025 13:47

Don't buy a pony for a toddler.

This is what I need to hear Grin

OP posts:
RandomMess · 17/02/2025 14:03

Imagine when your toddler is ill and then when they start school!

It's a very expensive pet for you Wink

Original poster
AwkwardPaws27 · 17/02/2025 14:03

NormalAuntFanny · 17/02/2025 13:47

He's just waiting for you to buy him before revealing his demonic side ;-)

I do regret not having a horse when the kids were little and we had space in the country but under 3 is a big gamble especially as you can't ride him yourself.

Are there other DC's who might ride too??

I do wonder if he'd just biding his time!
Only DS (although haven't ruled out having another baby in future, but took a while to have DS so he may be an only).

OP posts:
Stichintime · 17/02/2025 14:06

I'd only do it if I could ride the pony myself.

Original poster
AwkwardPaws27 · 17/02/2025 14:08

Maxorias · 17/02/2025 13:50

I mean, if you owned the poney would your dc ride more often than once or biweekly ? If not, it's really really not worth it.

If you reach a point at which the dc is keen to ride multiples times a week and is responsible enough to do at least some of the care (cleaning the hooves, taking care of the tack, rubbing the horse after work out, feeding the horse, etc) is when it would make sense. If you can afford it comfortably.

DS is at nursery Monday-Wednesday & has swimming lessons on Saturday.
i thought (while lying awake at 5am) that I'd give pony a day or two off, & lunge or walk in hand the other days.
DS would then ride Thursday, Friday & Sunday.
DS helps with grooming & is the world's slowest poo picker (but adores doing it, at the moment at least).

OP posts:
Original poster
AwkwardPaws27 · 17/02/2025 14:10

RandomMess · 17/02/2025 14:03

Imagine when your toddler is ill and then when they start school!

It's a very expensive pet for you Wink

This is a VERY good point. Illness would be hard to juggle & it would be dark after school for a big chunk of the year, wouldn't it.

OP posts:
Brbreeze · 17/02/2025 14:15

I bought one last summer when my LO was the same age. She rode weekly for the summer but has only seen the pony twice since November and currently has no interest in going to the stables. Spent hours yesterday pretending her dad was said pony though, tying up, grooming and riding in the living room 🙃🤣

I’m lucky in that my parents are horsey, and my mom actually rides the pony a couple of times a week for me. I also lunge a bit and lead it from my horse out hacking. Pony initially lived out but the fields are so wet this winter she is stables now at more cost.

If now 3 year old doesn’t show more interest when the weather improves, I’ll sell.

paintfairy · 17/02/2025 14:25

Honestly, it would be a right ball ache. Don't do it. 🤣
I've got my own horses and I've acquired a Shetland for my DD. It's only one more to look after. 🙄 And she doesn't really bother with it (I'm hoping she will) much. She likes to come and play about down there but she's not actually much bothered about the horses. I'm going every day anyway and so I have to spend the time going (it doesn't cost me extra to put one there either).
But if i was having to go daily just to do that and also pay top whack, then I'd find it a right pain in the arse. It's time consuming when you've other places you need to be. Then you've got days out and holidays. Not to mention the expense. And on top of that you'll still need to pay for lessons or pony club or whatever.
I would say you are better either riding someone else's for a small fee or just having lessons somewhere (you could afford a couple a week if not paying for your own pony). It's a ridiculous idea.
That said- I would buy the pony because I'm an idiot. 🤣

Original poster
AwkwardPaws27 · 17/02/2025 14:26

Brbreeze · 17/02/2025 14:15

I bought one last summer when my LO was the same age. She rode weekly for the summer but has only seen the pony twice since November and currently has no interest in going to the stables. Spent hours yesterday pretending her dad was said pony though, tying up, grooming and riding in the living room 🙃🤣

I’m lucky in that my parents are horsey, and my mom actually rides the pony a couple of times a week for me. I also lunge a bit and lead it from my horse out hacking. Pony initially lived out but the fields are so wet this winter she is stables now at more cost.

If now 3 year old doesn’t show more interest when the weather improves, I’ll sell.

Thank you. This is a good reality check - and part of my concern was that DS will lose interest (or at least lose enough interest to not fancy it in bad weather).

OP posts:
Ariela · 17/02/2025 14:28

Our Pony Club youngest member was about 18 months when they joined! Has a very keen older sibling, so it was really as soon as could sit up on a pony. Absolutely loves it though!

bobby81 · 17/02/2025 14:32

We’re on our second pony now & I won’t be buying another one! I’m not a horsey person though so that clouds my judgement a lot a guess. The cost, the mud, the time commitment and the cold weather are just awful. I do it because DD likes it & needs a hobby (she’s 13 so different to your situation I guess) but in the next couple of years I think she’ll lose a bit of interest & be too busy with exams etc. We’re on full livery (thank goodness!) but it’s still a big part of our lives & in the winter it’s hard.
I know I sound really negative about it but I just don’t think I realised what was involved & our lives were so much easier when DD just had a riding lesson once a week! Having said that I do think it’s been good for her to have a pony & it definitely reduces screen time! But you need to go into it with your eyes open & a realistic idea of the ongoing costs & time involved.

Original poster
AwkwardPaws27 · 17/02/2025 14:35

Ariela · 17/02/2025 14:28

Our Pony Club youngest member was about 18 months when they joined! Has a very keen older sibling, so it was really as soon as could sit up on a pony. Absolutely loves it though!

That is adorable. I'll definitely look into this.

I think we need to look for a longer-term share arrangement before DS (& I!) become too attached to this pony. If the pony wasn't going to be sold, I don't think I'd be thinking of buying, but I'm sad thinking of explaining to DS that the pony has a new owner.

OP posts:
Stickytreacle · 17/02/2025 15:10

Honestly, you'd be mad!
At his age he'll soon move on from not having the same pony. I'd be waiting until he was about seven before even considering buying. Lots can happen in the interim.

DeffoNeedANameChange · 17/02/2025 15:20

It's not so much that getting a shetland for a toddler is ridiculous. It's more that being tied to yard visits twice a day every day just for that Shetland will wear thin very quickly.

We've got a now retired Shetland, and my various kids at various times have been very keen, but there have also been lulls where no one was doing much with her. But I'm lucky to be able to have her at home with my other horse and pony, so she's very little bother, and I love having her around even when she's not "useful".

Ariela · 17/02/2025 17:50

I wouldn't buy one until your child is committed. DD was incredibly keen even as a toddler (a riding school comes past sometimes, a lady in our road has one and always stopped and it's quite a horsey area). Even so, she didn't have lessons till 4, she had lessons in a riding school from 4 to 10, at 9 she rode a pony that was kept in a field around the corner as well - she only rode, no chores, then we got her first pony when she was 10, joined pony club and she had great fun, made lots of friends. But she does everything for her horses herself, I only help when there's a valid reason she can't otherwise swap with other people at the yard

Gremlinsateit · 17/02/2025 22:00

From another perspective, I would say don’t buy a 5 year old for a child. As a returning beginner, I had a loan of a very nice 5 year old, and while there were other factors (including that the owner had originally told me he was older!), he did turn into a crazy teenager as he turned 6.

biscuitsandbooks · 18/02/2025 08:15

You'd be mad.

If you already had your own horse and were committed to visits anyway, or had land at home, then maybe - but buying a Shetland for a toddler and putting it on livery is just insane!