Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
The tack room

Discuss horse riding and ownership on our Horse forum.

Original poster

Too old to sell? Thoughts please

30 replies

ActiveWomble · 09/01/2025 11:10

I have a 17 yr old (18 this year) TBx mare who I've owned for 10 years. Over the last couple of years I've slowly lost the love for riding as much as I did, I do still enjoy it but it is becoming more and more of a chore, especially in winter and with 2 small children, time and money is v stretched.

My husband broached the subject of what we are doing with her the other day and I am really torn and could do with others' thoughts:

Reasons to sell:

  • Lack of time and energy to enjoy her properly, riding has become a chore which I'm not enjoying as much.
  • She is not ready to retire, is full of beans and would love to be doing more, so I feel guilty she has such a boring life and I can't give her the attention/exercise she deserves.
  • If I were to sell, the money saved from livery/insurance would pay for so many other things for my kids, clubs, nice holidays etc.
  • She might still live for another 10/15 years which is a lot of money/time to continue to commit.

Reasons not to sell:

  • I'd have no control over what her new owner did with her and how she was managed.
  • She has arthritis and probably wouldn't pass a stringent vetting but it is well managed and she is more than capable of a hacking/low level dressage home. Ideally I would sell her as a hack/field companion to someone I know or have good references for that would maybe mitigate this risk.
  • I worry I'd feel judged if I advertised her (I know I've always judged anyone selling a veteran horse).

I'm not interested in making money from selling her and we can afford to keep her but I feel I'm condoning her to a boring life and I'm finding myself watching the livery money go out every month and thinking what else we could do with it- previously it was money well spent as it was a hobby I was so passionate about.

What are people's thoughts?

OP posts:
Sprig1 · 09/01/2025 11:17

How about advertising and seeing how it goes. If you price sensibly you should have your pick of people and may just find the ideal person.

Fartughtyred · 09/01/2025 11:20

I personally wouldn't think of selling her at 18 and after 10 years with you. I don't subscribe to the view that horses 'need to be doing something ' They don't, they are generally very content grazing with the herd or their companions. Why not offer her on loan or part loan to someone local on the basis that she stays at her current yard. That way you retain control over her future and disruption is kept to a minimum for her.

brokenwand · 09/01/2025 11:32

can you offer her for loan or part loan?

Floralnomad · 09/01/2025 11:33

You could try and get some sharers which would offset the cost and time commitment . I agree with the pp that horses don’t need to be doing anything if they have good turnout and some mates . I wouldn’t sell at that age but then we never sold any of ours because to us they were a family pet in the same way as a dog or cat .

twistyizzy · 09/01/2025 11:36

Sorry I feel very strongly about this that you shouldn't sell a horse of that age. I've seen horses 20+ be drugged and sold as sound for riding then being passed from pillar to post until they die neglected somewhere.
We owe our horses a good retirement, it is part of the commitment to owning them. I say this as owner of a 21 yr old TB whom i retired in Sept 24. He recored healthy and sound but had given me an amazing 10 years. I don't have my own land so have to pay for his retirement and therefore can't afford a new one but it gives me massive satisfaction to see him growing old happy, in a field.

If you can't afford/don't want a retired horse then you can't afford/shouldn't have a horse imo.

twistyizzy · 09/01/2025 11:45

Horses don't need to be doing something, their only goal in life is: friends + freedom. Living their best life in a field with friends is an ideal retirement.

maxelly · 09/01/2025 11:59

Agree with others, I'm not sentimental about selling horses and if she was 10 or even 5 years younger I'd say sell, or perhaps if she was a pony breed who's longevity is better, or if she was totally sound then maybe, but a late teens TB with beginnings of arthritis is very much at the end of her working life already and at real risk of being passed around or being forcibly ridden through pain until she breaks or other nasty fates I'm afraid. Certainly while she's still sound you could loan her out to a trusted person on the understanding that as soon as she's had enough she comes back to you, or part loan at your own yard under your supervision, but otherwise I think you should be planning for her retirement - have you looked into retirement livery, there are some excellent options? If you happen to find someone who wants a field companion then that's great although TBH most people don't want a thoroughbred for this job, they're just too high maintenance when there's so many easygoing little native or cobby ponies around that live out unrugged in any weather and live off thin air. I'd still loan as a companion rather than sell so if circumstances change (which they can easily do, the horse who's companion the mare was to be can die or be sold, they can lose their grazing and move to livery so no need for a companion etc etc) you still have control over her future. With any loan you'd need to keep enough in the bank to fund a sudden return to livery...

I totally get your DH's point of view, not to guilt trip you, like I say I do and have sold on horses where they can do a more useful job for someone else than me, and I have also put down some horses that others might have kept going where there were significant health and behavioural issues, but really i do think I'd want to give this mare at least another summer while she's sound and enjoying life...

caringcarer · 09/01/2025 12:30

You owe the horse a happy retirement after the 10 years she has given to you . You could part loan her out to a person you trust to lightly exercise her a couple of times a week.

Balloonhearts · 09/01/2025 13:15

I'd loan her out. Some horses absolutely do need to be doing something. I've known one who was retired on medical grounds and ended up depressed despite being out all day every day on a massive field with 7 others. All he wanted to do was hack out and jump. We ended up training him to work on a headcollar as he couldn't be bridled and jumping him bareback. (Couldn't be saddled either.) He recovered quickly once back in work and is now in his late 20s and still jumping and hacking out in just a headcollar and lead ropes.

If you loan her, you still have control of where she is and who looks after her but less expense and she gets to do more.

Pleasedontdothat · 09/01/2025 14:11

You worry you’d feel judged if you sold her .. that’s because you know it’s not the right thing to do to a horse of her age, with some medical issues and one you’ve had for ten years. To be honest you’d get a pittance for an 18 year old TB even without arthritis - a few hundred pounds or even a couple of thousand (unlikely) wouldn’t make up for the sleepless nights I’d have worrying about her being passed around if I were in that position. I agree with pretty much everyone else - either loan her or get a sharer or retire her.

Floralsofa · 09/01/2025 14:13

I had the same situation, I would never have sold him and I kept him until he died. Found a part loaner which offset the cost, rode him myself once a week and otherwise he waa out happy with his friends. Cruel to sell in my opinion.

WelshPony · 09/01/2025 15:20

I think most owners are feeling a bit unmotivated at this time of year so wouldn’t make any decisions now that can’t be reversed.
I would advertise or ask around for someone to share your horse. This would keep her ticking over so you only ride if you want to and also contribute towards her keep. If you find you haven’t bothered riding for 6 months then decide what to do.
Whether you sell or full loan at this point is determined by your morals. I know of hunting/pony club homes who are very black and white and once the animal is no longer of use they are PTS. in some ways I respect this as I think it is better than selling to an uncertain future.

frostyfingers · 09/01/2025 15:51

We took on, for a nominal sum, a friend's elderly horse who although sound had worked hard and with not great conformation was a bit fragile. The agreement was that the horse was ours to do as we wished with but to keep them informed. We had her put down after four fabulous years, following an injury that repaired with 10 months off plus rehab, but then recurred on a hack and was deemed by the vet to be the end of her ridden career. She was turned away with a field friend but was stiffening up and struggling to get down to roll and more importantly up again, so following the vet's advice and letting our friend know we called time.

If you could find a person prepared to do that, who you wholly trust then yes absolutely move her on, but otherwise I'd be happy to retire to a field at that age. As long as she's having her needs met re grazing, companionship and veterinary care she'll be fine mooching about - they do get used to it and settle down to a new routine. I wouldn't be keen on selling a horse of that age on to a complete stranger I'm afraid.

Original poster
ActiveWomble · 09/01/2025 18:27

Thanks all. I should have also said I’ve tried advertising her to loan and had not much interest (from anyone normal anyway- I was quite picky).

I really feel strongly that I don’t want to sell for all the reasons above but the idea of paying for her to just be sat at a livery yard also makes me uncomfortable with the costs associated and the impact it has on my family. Obviously my circumstances have changed in the last 10 years as many people’s do (thought I wasn’t able to have kids etc).

I’m tempted to speak to a few close friends who have big networks of people and maybe try and find a retirement/companion home through word of mouth with someone I know well and know she would be safe with. If I can’t find I that I think I’ll have to just accept the costs for as long as necessary.

OP posts:
Floralsofa · 09/01/2025 18:58

If you are picky with just a loaner, why would you even contemplate selling?

Floralnomad · 09/01/2025 19:46

How much does she cost you now for livery ? Then look into retirement livery etc and see if it adds up .

AlwaysGinPlease · 09/01/2025 21:43

Floralsofa · 09/01/2025 14:13

I had the same situation, I would never have sold him and I kept him until he died. Found a part loaner which offset the cost, rode him myself once a week and otherwise he waa out happy with his friends. Cruel to sell in my opinion.

This. Very cruel.

couraggio · 09/01/2025 23:46

I think OK to sell at that age if she can still be ridden - but only if I found a really nice home which I felt confident would be a forever home.

Once they hit their twenties I wouldn’t sell, but I don’t think you’re quite at the point where it would be immoral to do so.

Having said all that, I would find it very hard to part with any animal! So would probably find a loan home myself. But I wouldn’t judge you if you sold.

sadstruggler · 10/01/2025 00:27

She's a horse not an asset. You have a duty of care to give her a good retirement with a companion.

Watervoles · 10/01/2025 00:52

If you haven't had much interest from loaners there is no way you will have genuine interest from buyers. You are potentially sentencing this poor horse to being passed around and worked past the point she is able to. I have ended up with several retired horses, yes it is expensive, but I owe it to them to let them live out their days safe and loved. If that means your family having to make sacrifices so be it. She has given you so much

ticktock19 · 10/01/2025 01:05

If you've got a Riding for the Disabled group near to you then you could contact them and offer her on loan to them? Older, reliable horses are just what they need

Donkeyfromshrek · 10/01/2025 08:42

Floralnomad · 09/01/2025 19:46

How much does she cost you now for livery ? Then look into retirement livery etc and see if it adds up .

This. Retirement livery can be quite reasonable, and probably cheaper than what you are paying now. It is what I would do in your shoes.

Blankscreen · 11/01/2025 08:03

I would echo trying to find a sharer or a full loan home.

I think selling her runs the risk of her ending up in the wrong hands.

If you were picky finding a loan home you would have absolutely no control at all once you'd sold her. I'm on some of the dodgy dealer site on Facebook and read all sorts of stories where an older horse has been sold to a 'home for life' to do low level hacking and then the old owner is devastated when it's up for sale for ££££ and the buyer claims their circumstances have changed and can no longer keep said horse.

I totally get that the money coming out of the bank every month is draining when your priorities have changed but I don't think I could sell her.

Postapocalypticcowgirl · 12/01/2025 15:59

Ultimately, once you sell a horse, you lose control of their future. I know you talk about asking for references etc, but equally you're talking about a horse who you know won't pass a full 5* vetting. The sort of people who are willing to get references and offer an amazing home tend not to be looking for a semi-retired horse.

There are way too many people out there who would talk the talk and say they are offering a home for life, only to turn around and sell in 3-6 months, potentially full of bute and not being honest. Equally, you'll get people who will try and keep her going forever and not PTS when you would or when she has no quality of life.

You say you're worried about her having a boring life, but you're also looking for a field companion home, which doesn't quite make sense?

I get it, it's a very tricky situation, but I would persevere with looking for a loan/part loan rather than giving up all control. I do think there are people out there who would happily take her for a light hack 1-2 times a week.

However, I would say at 18, I probably wouldn't insure, and if anything catastrophic happened, I would be considering PTS. I wouldn't put an 18yo (or older) horse through colic surgery, or lots of investigations etc.

Postapocalypticcowgirl · 12/01/2025 16:00

ticktock19 · 10/01/2025 01:05

If you've got a Riding for the Disabled group near to you then you could contact them and offer her on loan to them? Older, reliable horses are just what they need

Do RDA really want horses that wouldn't pass a vetting, and potentially aren't capable of that much in the way of ridden work? Full of beans also doesn't really scream RDA horse to me?

Swipe left for the next trending thread