Feel disheartened

[Indoorvoicesbluey]

Dd15 has been having regular lessons with our 12 year old cob. Cob came to us broken but green. We’ve had her 2 years and have 2 different trainers. I had a message to say trainer thinks she can’t take dd and pony any further together and she suggests that she schools pony (which she has been doing and is doing amazing) and then dd15 once pony is broken.

trainer is amazing and has done a lot with pony, im just not sure which way to turn now. Ugh feel disheartened

Sorry to hear this. I don't quite understand your trainer's message - your trainer wants to school the pony until it's broken and then your DD can ride? But you say the pony was already broken when you got her two years ago?

Is it that the trainer is saying the pony would benefit from further professional schooling and that she suggests she does this and then your DD takes over? In itself this doesn't sound totally crazy or unreasonable or something you need to be downhearted about, most amateurs (even adults never mind children) need some professional help in bringing on young/green horses, not just for the initial breaking in but if they want to progress with their schooling to more advanced dressage movements or bigger jumps or simply overcoming the problems which do arise especially with more sensitive/tricky horses or ones with conformation issues which make it harder for them to work correctly.

I've frequently been through periods with my own green/problem horses where I've had my instructor regularly ride them for me as it's simply much easier for her to sort the horse out/teach them correctly, then she teaches me to maintain that than try and do both at the same time, where I might be giving muddled or inconsistent messages because I'm still learning, which will confuse and perhaps upset the horse. It's always been my choice though and done with full communication as to her plans, how long it should take, how much she wants to be paid etc - and I don't think she would have refused to teach me at all if I hadn't agreed with her plan so that doesn't sound great if that's what the teacher is saying to you.

What are your DDs aspirations for the pony? If she's quite happy pottering around and hacking and she's able to safely do that then I see no reason why she needs to 'progress' as such, or why it would be a problem if the progression is slow, but of course if she's wanting to compete successfully or if she's getting decked on a regular basis or getting frustrated with herself and the pony then I can see that is would be difficult and she does need a bit more help?

I agree that is sounds like the trainer believes the horse needs more schooling before they are suitable for your daughter's needs. It is very difficult to bring a young horse on on your own. Having worked with horses, been to college to study horse care and having had multiple horses for decades I still get professional help and schooling for quite some time with a less established horse. It is a large commitment I agree but achievable