Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
The tack room

Discuss horse riding and ownership on our Horse forum.

Original poster

What are the benefits of owning a horse

78 replies

Buttons232 · 25/05/2023 06:30

So, vet check allowing, I’m on the brink of buying a horse for my 13 Yr old. She’s been riding since she was 4, not because we’re horsey just because she was born obsessed! Over the years I’ve come to the realisation that sadly, this is not a phase! She’s driven, totally committed and is very single minded about her need to improve. It’s not just riding them , it’s everything about them, mucking them out, feeding them, just looking at them. It’s insatiable 😂 I have two other kids who just aren’t the same, never have been and just don’t really care, so I have no idea where this has come from but it’s there and it’s not going away 😂

It’s been something we’ve considered for awhile now. I’ve looked and looked for a loan or part loan but finding the right one in the right place at her age has been impossible. The money’s there. She left an independent school last year, choosing a state school instead and is settled and thriving there. I’ve got a livery place and know about horse care to a degree as we had rescues growing up on a farm. I know very little about riding though as they were all retired or non riders.

I’m a natural catastrophiser so have already considered, in depth, in the middle of numerous sleepless nights why this is a shockingly, awful idea 😂

So my question is, why is it a good idea? What are the benefits ? Could some good come out of this? Isn’t it better than sitting in your room on TikTok? xxx

OP posts:
overitunderit · 25/05/2023 11:34

I would say absolutely DO NOT go for a DIY yard 40 minutes away!! You have to go twice a day if she is stabled and you will be there for probably a minimum of an hour doing jobs one of those trips without riding. I'm currently doing DIY and the only way it's possible with a family and a job and so on is that it's 5 minutes drive. If you ride and do all your jobs you probably need to allow 2.5 hours so if you're adding 40 minutes each way it's so time consuming.

overitunderit · 25/05/2023 11:35

Sorry just seen the DIY is 25 minutes away...that's still too far in my view. DIY has lots of lovely advantages but having someone on hand to help once a day and company for the pony is so valuable.

twistyizzy · 25/05/2023 11:38

Buttons232 · 25/05/2023 10:02

This is all great advice. Thanks you x

I'm budgeting a minimum of £7000 a year but there’s more if needs be. We were paying £16,000 a year in school fees just for her until a year ago. The reason for her being in private school was that she’s dyslexic and it worked well in prep but not at secondary. Her current State school are brilliant with her though and she’s making progress and is very happy there. Her dyslexia affects her self esteem though and horses seem to be the tonic for that.

We’ve got the option of either diy livery ( 25 minutes away) with access to loads of hacking and an arena to hire down the road although it’s not the nicest road! We were going to jump at this. However, the horse we’ve found is currently on a really lovely yard. The seller says she’s a pleasure to have around and would jump at the chance to keep her there if that’s what we wanted. Part livery, 5 days a week with all food / bedding/ turning in and out / rugging works out about £2000 -£3000 more a year than the DIY. However, in the DIY yard she’d be on a strip of land with other horses around but not with her . She’d have her own stable but a companion horse isn’t a given there unless I get another one! There are only 9 other horses there. In the current yard she’d have a companion in with her. So potentially it doesn’t work out cheaper if I end up with two horses 😂 On her current yard there’s a fantastic arena on site, XC, local hacking. It’s very rural and quiet around there. It’s very, very secure. The owner buys, sells and breeds sports horses as well as offering all types of livery. She seems to be very well connected. Most importantly she’s absolutely lovely, honest, genuine, calm and completely fine with me asking her ridiculous questions etc. My daughter really clicked with her. She gave her a mini lesson and said she can teach too or knows instructors who would come and teach on site.

I’m very tempted to keep her where she is. The only issue is that it’s 40 minutes away , although only 15 minutes from DD’s school. However, she travels that far 2/3 times a week to her current riding stables anyway. I feel like the horse would potentially be a lot happier there and that DD would have some great opportunities there.

If she loses interest the horse is sold or at least long term loaned. I’ve made this very clear to her and she’s in agreement with that too because she recognises that it’s a great horse that deserves to be ridden. It would be such a waste.

Do not move to a DIY yard 40 mins away as you will need to visit horse twice a day especially in winter! On Full livery yes but even then it will be a drag. Think about Xmas day you need a 40 min drive there, 1 and a half hours to do horse then 40 min drive back and then back again in the evening.
I have always been DIY and the yard I've stuck at is a 6 min drive

crumpet · 25/05/2023 11:38

Dd loved pony club. The chance to ride with equally obsessed children her age, and of course camp! If she might be competitive the. Trying out for pc teams might be fun, but otherwise the rallies and camp offer a lot.

crumpet · 25/05/2023 11:39

Plus she’d be covered by PC insurance which is not to be sniffed at

Damnspot · 25/05/2023 11:48

So if you drive dd there after school you'd have to stay there? Do you have any other children or a job as obviously that will impact the viability of plan

Damnspot · 25/05/2023 11:50

My fields and stables are a 4 minute walk from.my house and even that feels horrendous during the Winter!! We go over three times a day.

Wallywobbles · 25/05/2023 11:51

Keep them a bike ride from home if at all possible.

BanditsOnTheHorizon · 25/05/2023 11:52

Outside in the fresh air
Not sat in her bedroom on her phone
It's good exercise
Good for mental health
She'll never have any spare money for drugs or alcohol
Boys will be way down her list of priorities
Teaches her discipline
Caring for animals
Good life and social skills
She can join a Pony Club and work her way towards qualifications which will look good on a uni application

overitunderit · 25/05/2023 12:06

It's a massive time commitment when I read your post back. You're committing to driving 40 minutes each way 2-3 times during the week for her to ride then you would need to be there twice a day at the weekend. 40 minutes plus 1.5 hours = over two hours in the morning then 80 minute round trip in the evening (or vice versa) plus extra time for riding. What about your other DC and DH/job/social life if there is one?

Can you have a look at yards closer to home? Ideally you want her to be able to get there herself for her lessons (don't forget to factor in the cost of those too) and weekend jobs or drive her there and be able to go home again. There will be a local equestrian Facebook group or two that you can post on to ask for recommendations for livery yards near you.

Lastqueenofscotland2 · 25/05/2023 12:18

I would make sure you’re at a yard closer to home. I was at one 40 minutes away on full livery and it was a pain!!!

Chesneyhawkes1 · 25/05/2023 12:39

You will never have to wonder what to do with spare time or money again. As you will have neither 😁

Damnspot · 25/05/2023 12:53

Chesneyhawkes1 · 25/05/2023 12:39

You will never have to wonder what to do with spare time or money again. As you will have neither 😁

Omg this.

SkaneTos · 25/05/2023 13:09

overitunderit · 25/05/2023 11:34

I would say absolutely DO NOT go for a DIY yard 40 minutes away!! You have to go twice a day if she is stabled and you will be there for probably a minimum of an hour doing jobs one of those trips without riding. I'm currently doing DIY and the only way it's possible with a family and a job and so on is that it's 5 minutes drive. If you ride and do all your jobs you probably need to allow 2.5 hours so if you're adding 40 minutes each way it's so time consuming.

I agree with this. 40 minutes away is too far away.

Damnspot · 25/05/2023 13:11

SkaneTos · 25/05/2023 13:09

I agree with this. 40 minutes away is too far away.

Show quote history

It's not a DIY

Tbh I know people that do this (livery 40 mins away) but they are on full livery so only go a couple of times a week.

overitunderit · 25/05/2023 13:15

@Damnspot the DIY one is 25 minutes away.

The 40 minute one is 5/2

In my humble opinion both of those options are too far away for a child's pony when there are other children and the mother isn't horsey.

Lastqueenofscotland2 · 25/05/2023 13:35

I would also consider a few further things. A horse suitable for a novice teenager (which realistically regardless of how good she is in a riding school context, she is) will be incredibly expensive, you will be lucky to get change from 10k. If someone can offer you this horse for £3k there is something likely wrong with it.

Do not go on DIY with your first horse if you aren’t horsey, you will need help. Can you/your DD spot a lame horse, safely do first aid etc.

Finally I’d make sure you/your DD are realistic that owning horses and riding horses are not always the same hobby. They could do a tendon and need 6 months off. They could end up with arthritic hocks at 7 years old and only be able to do walk hacking. These are obviously unlucky situations but important to be realistic.

Lastqueenofscotland2 · 25/05/2023 13:35

Horses are wonderful but it’s important to go in with eyes open that it’s not all summer hacks and jumping lessons!

Damnspot · 25/05/2023 13:38

overitunderit · 25/05/2023 13:15

@Damnspot the DIY one is 25 minutes away.

The 40 minute one is 5/2

In my humble opinion both of those options are too far away for a child's pony when there are other children and the mother isn't horsey.

Well I agree but I know we are 'lucky' to have ours at home and not everyone has that 'luxury'. Don't want to put the OP off.

Original poster
Buttons232 · 25/05/2023 13:43

The 40 minutes is 5/2 livery
The 25 minutes is DIY. This one is only ten minutes from her school which we’re driving to anyway 5 days a week. It’s between school and home.

The 40 minute one is further than her school but as it’s 5/2 would be possible to get to 2-3 evenings a week. It’s also possible to have full livery as and when needed.

Livery of any kind is virtually non existent where we live. There’s definitely nothing she could walk or cycle to. There’s also massive waiting lists on all the nearby yards. There are three adults involved in the school runs which makes it more doable. One of the kids is older and pretty self sufficient. My job is school hours, term time only and only part time.

her current riding school is the same distance and she goes regularly one night after school and both Saturday and Sunday. The other two don’t miss out as such as we have a parent with each. They’re doing stuff with us too.

OP posts:
XelaM · 25/05/2023 13:46

OP our 5/2 yard is 30mins drive away but 15mins from my daughter's school and it work fine for us. My daughter goes there after school every day though and spends all weekends at the yard. But luckily I don't have to babysit her there. She's there with her friends and the yard staff.

overitunderit · 25/05/2023 13:47

Buttons232 · 25/05/2023 13:43

The 40 minutes is 5/2 livery
The 25 minutes is DIY. This one is only ten minutes from her school which we’re driving to anyway 5 days a week. It’s between school and home.

The 40 minute one is further than her school but as it’s 5/2 would be possible to get to 2-3 evenings a week. It’s also possible to have full livery as and when needed.

Livery of any kind is virtually non existent where we live. There’s definitely nothing she could walk or cycle to. There’s also massive waiting lists on all the nearby yards. There are three adults involved in the school runs which makes it more doable. One of the kids is older and pretty self sufficient. My job is school hours, term time only and only part time.

her current riding school is the same distance and she goes regularly one night after school and both Saturday and Sunday. The other two don’t miss out as such as we have a parent with each. They’re doing stuff with us too.

It sounds to me like you've already made your mind up that you're going to do it. That's great. I'm not sure you need much help persuading you that it's a good idea or the benefits of it as you clearly want to do this for your daughter. Most parents would do what they could to make their children happy and would tolerate a small risk that it goes wrong and decisions have to be unmade if the decision turns out to be the wrong one.

At the end of the day life is short and you seem committed to this choice so just go for it and stop doubting yourself! I think you already know what to do.

Make sure you post pictures of the pony so that we can see her! How exciting!

Original poster
Buttons232 · 25/05/2023 13:49

Also, longer term there’s a DIY coming up 10 minutes away with one other horse and an arena but due to building work on new stables it’s not available until next year.

OP posts:
XelaM · 25/05/2023 13:52

Buttons232 · 25/05/2023 13:49

Also, longer term there’s a DIY coming up 10 minutes away with one other horse and an arena but due to building work on new stables it’s not available until next year.

I would not advise to do DIY for a child's first pony if you're not from a horsey family. It's not fun for a child (even the most experienced teenager won't find it fun in winter and rain if she doesn't have teen friends there) and it's very important to have help on hand.

tenbob · 25/05/2023 13:55

Definitely keep the horse at the current yard… the facilities and people who know the horse will be invaluable

In terms of benefits… you just become a different class of rider when are riding the same horse every day, and you’re the only person riding your horse. The bond you develop and the response you get back is completely different to anything you can get from a school horse.

Daily schooling of your own horse is also very different to having lessons. You have to decide what you’re going to work on, set some goals, think for yourself. It is also quite relaxing and therapeutic in a way… just having that time together both practicing whatever you need to work on.
I think those are all great things for a teenager to have in their life.

and as others have said, resilience, putting something else first, knowing you’ve got to do the dirty jobs if you want the rewards (tack cleaning can also be therapeutic though!) is all very useful. Plus the basics of nutrition, importance of rest and recovery with exercise- it’s all really useful stuff to know.

DH still marvels at how well I can use a broom in our urban garden, after decades of sweeping yards, so I would say it also brings transferable skills 😉

Swipe left for the next trending thread