Always put myself down!

[Jamesandthegiantpeach74]

Im fed up with doing this. My 14yr old is a rescue cob, she has a very good life and Ive had her 2.5yrs. She is moody, doing up girth, I plait her forelock because its long but she always pulls away. She does this stupid thing when going into trot (very occasionally) where she'll stop dead and Im fed up with it.
Dont normally use my whip cos she doesnt like it but I did tonight. She kicked out and then went forwards. Thank you!
She is my world and and I have been scared of her which is so stupid, Im 41 and have 3 kids, never thought I would have my own but I do and I love her so much.
I look at others riding and think I am incapable, sometimes think I should send her back to the sanctuary but actually we are doing what we want to do, hacking and a bit of schooling. The last owner said you will never get her in the menage!
I see other girls at the yard riding their ponies and think why cant I be like them but then get a check that actually I do the best I csn
Does anyone else feel like this?

Are you having lessons with an instructor that you both get on with? Even if you just want to hack, having experienced eyes on the ground while you’re riding is invaluable. Also, some of the things you mention suggest your horse is in pain or discomfort - have you had the vet out to see her recently? Horses don’t do things to be annoying or naughty - they aren’t capable of thinking like that. They are extremely good at hiding pain/discomfort because they’re prey animals.

With the pulling away when you’re plaiting her forelock, she’s telling you that there’s something about what you’re doing that she doesn’t like or is worrying her - can you break it down into smaller components and only move onto the next stage when she’s completely comfortable with the previous one?

Agree with please don’t. Horses aren’t naughty; annoying or rude, that’s not how they work. They are telling you they don’t like something. Pulling faces doing up a girth and stopping dead when in ridden work could all point to things. Girthyness very often goes hand in hand with ulcers.
While I’ve no objection to a tickle with a schooling whip if something is not going forward, needing to pony club kick and smack with a crop to keep something in trot is not ok and not normal, although sadly very common in riding schools these days.
From what you’ve said I’d personally be getting the horse scoped as they don’t sound comfortable

Also you mentioned she’s not keen in the school, to the extent previous homes haven’t managed to get her in the school. Some horses hate schooling (which might explain the grinding to a halt) balance and soundness issues means it’s really hard, and most people’s schooling is really bloody dull, what are you doing? Lots of exercises and pole work or just w/t/c with the odd 20m circle in for good measure? If it’s the latter she may be bored out of her mind and gone school sour.

You’ve got a very unhappy horse. I would be scoping for ulcers

It took me well over a year to bond with one of our ponies. We had to get to know each other and she was nothing like our other two. I'd spend lots of time walking her in hand and doing groundwork to establish some boundaries. And yes it may be that she has ulcers.

I have to agree with the previous posters - there's something bothering her. Being moody when girthed, not wanting to go in the school, stopping dead sometimes when asked to transition upwards - ulcers is my hunch. If you love her, then get a vet to check her over.