Daughter asking to loan / share a horse

[Kazplus2]

As per the title, my daughter has started asking if she can take on a share of a horse. She is 14 and has been riding for about 18 mths. She can trot canter and jump and she helps out every other week so capable of mucking out, grooming, getting the horses ready for riding. The problem is I know nothing about horses so have no idea whether this is realistic for her level. Also, she would not be able to do lessons if if I was paying for a share as the cost for both would be too much
I don't think she sees this as a problem tho and is desperate to have a share. My question is, what is realistically involved in a horse share and could it be right for her. What are the pros and cons? Rough costs? I assume she would need adult supervision at all times but is there anything else I should think about?

It’s so lovely you are encouraging her and also that you are doing your research.
I think your best bet is that she asked the stables where she currently rides whether they do a part loan/share scheme. Where it’s set up for novices.
Others might disagree with me, but I wouldn’t want to take on a sharer of 14 with novice parents and only 18 months of riding. She might be able to canter and jump on a riding school pony but riding school ponies are very different to privately owned ones usually. Having novices about would essentially mean me being there and over seeing everything. Which is actually a lot more work than help and negates the whole point of having a sharer.
lots of riding school around here offer a part share / loan scheme of their ponies. So I think that’s the best bet. The pony is looked after properly and supervised.
Having A pony on share / loan and then giving up lessons is a recipe for disaster especially at the level your daughter is at I’m afraid, and on a private yard or where you and your daughter are fully responsible on her days is just not safe for anyone.

I agree with the above.
If it meant she couldn’t have lessons it would
be a really hard no from me. They are more important.

I also agree you might find someone wary of loaning to a novice 14 year old and completely non horsey mum. Unsupervised this sounds like it has the potential for someone to get hurt.

I share my horses and don’t mind a few nerves or someone a bit rusty etc while riding but I wouldn’t have someone novice on the ground on a yard where they might be completely alone (ours is very quiet as most liveries are full) and get in a sticky situation with no help.

I think she's too young and inexperienced to take on a share.

As PP have said, safe riding school horses are very different to privately owned ones. And if you know nothing about horses, who is going to supervise her and go out with her on rides or hacks or in the arena? Would she know what to do if the horse bucked or bolted? What would happen if it had her off and injured her?

I don't say any of that to scare you, but it's a big leap from riding lessons in an arena with a qualified instructor to being out on your own with no supervision or back-up.

It's a difficult age and experience level to share.

Lots are OK sharing a lead rein pony for little kids and can show the parents the ropes. But a 14 year old will be riding unassisted and want to progress to more cantering and jumping.

It's not impossible to find someone desperate enough to need help to do this but really wouldn't be very safe unless she's a decent rider which I doubt.

As others said, a share at a riding school where she'll be taught further skills and supervised would be ideal.

If not that she could offer to help out at riding school or private horse without any expectation of riding to at least get some practical experience in horse care and management whilst she continues with lessons.

Another thing I’d really hammer home is to be really realistic about your daughters ability.
I don’t wish to sound horrible but I’d hazard a guess as a teenager cantering/jumping in a riding school she probably thinks she’s a lot better than she actually is, it’s easily done as she’ll be comparatively quite competent compared to huge numbers of their clients base who can’t yet rise to the trot properly.
In real terms she will be incredibly novice and would probably be drastically overhorsed by a pretty bog standard PC all rounder which will be so much more responsive than she’s used to.

I’d speak to her instructor who may have a better idea of what is realistic at this stage.

Thanks everyone. The responses are in line with my thinking. She is doing well but still got a lot to learn and not ready for a loan pony at the expense of lessons. I will suggest maybe we review the situation in a year at which time I can get her properly graded. The riding school wouldn't have any appropriate for her to loan at present. They are a small school and all existing horses are loaned already or too small.

I think that sounds sensible, keep going with her lessons and let the stables know she's interested in a part-loan as something may come up, my school offers loans/shares and while it's not perfect I do think it's ideal for teenagers to have their first taste of riding and caring for a horse independently without non-horsey parents having to take on more responsibility than they are really ready for, if she could do that first she could well be ready for more in a year or two. Like others have said it's a fairly big transition even for a very capable riding-school rider, a privately owned horses, even a quiet one will likely be more energetic and sensitive than even the trickiest riding school pony, and if she's only done lessons and helping out so far it's a big deal to suddenly be doing all stable jobs and riding entirely on her own, does she know what to do if things go wrong for instance, does she know how to spot if the horse feels lame or 'off', does she know how to plan a schooling session without input from a teacher, 'now change the rein', 'now canter' etc or will she end up going round and round the school aimlessly? These are all things she could work on within her current riding school set-up, e.g. if she doesn't already do this can she ask her instructor to 'work in open order' for at least some of their lessons (this means each rider working independently, moving around each other to avoid crashes, planning what you are working on and what you'll do next rather than following one another around or all doing a set exercise one at a time). A useful exercise for a class is to warm up in open order for 15 -20 mins without input from the teacher (other than safety related of course!), come into the middle and each give a short assessment of your horse/pony, how they are feeling today, strengths and weaknesses and what you would like to work on or improve, then identify 2-3 schooling exercises that will help with that (instructor may have to make suggestions at first, but advanced riders ready to ride independently should be able to do this alone) - go off and work on those exercises in open order, then come back in again and review how it's gone (and repeat if time). Basically moving to much more of a coaching style of riding that prepares them for independent riding - a bit of a mood shift if the teacher is used to telling them what to do every second of the lesson, but really vital if she wants a loan or share horse in future. To be honest I would say it's very important to continue with lessons even if she does get a share or loan, ideally lessons on the loan/share horse rather than at a riding school, maybe not every week but it's important to have at least occasional coaching input to maintain confidence, spot issues, set goals, continue to improve etc. If finances are an issue so you really can't afford even occasional lessons (bearing in mind lessons on your own horse are usually cheaper than a a riding school) then I'd look for a share where she does more jobs (e.g. horse on DIY livery so she does everything, muck out etc) in exchange for riding rather than a greater financial contribution and a fancier stables, as I really think she could get a bit stuck and bored or frustrated with no supervision/input at all.

The other practical point to be aware of with shares for kids is how they are going to get themselves to and from the stables, the majority of livery stables I would say don't have good public transport access at all, so she'd be reliant on you picking her up/dropping her off, and some stables will require a responsible adult to at least be on site if not actively supervising for all under 18s so you might have to hang around in the car while she rides. Doing that multiple times a week in the depths of winter is no joke and a lot worse than once a week for a half hour lesson or dropping off first thing to help out and leaving her, it can have a real impact on parents and the rest of the family! If you could find a stables within a bike or bus ride distance that doesn't mind her being there alone that would be great, but that of course limits options further in terms of finding the right horse and the right owner (!) for her. Plus the time commitment usually required for a share, most are 2 or 3 days a week including at least one weekday evening and she'd need to be there for a few hours at a time to ride and do whatever stable jobs are needed, which is quite a lot for young teens approaching their GCSE years, particularly if they have other hobbies they want to keep up plus have a social life and maybe a saturday job or family commitments as well. She may be desperate for this now (been there done that!) but there's nothing wrong with you taking an adult decision that she needs to wait a few years to really amp up her riding. Lessons and helping out at the weekends are all many of us horsey adults had as kids because that's what our parents could afford/manage and frankly we were bloody lucky at that, loads of kids would love to ride and just can't, it's an expensive hobby. I'm sure she would really really love a horse of her own or a loan/share and sees other kids on her yard having that so it's tough for her, it's a hard life lesson to learn that you can't always have what you want and what other people already have immediately. But hey, it's a good motivation to get a good job and a car and so on so she can fund her own horsey dreams in future

Sorry, in my already long post I missed that you asked for rough costs, it's a bit of a how long is a piece of string question and can really vary also area by area but I would say there are a couple of options.

Most basic is a hardy horse kept in the most low cost way at a very basic DIY or grass livery so the point of having a sharer really is to relieve the owner of all stable jobs and responsibilities for some of the week rather than financial. The cost for this will usually be fairly notional, maybe around £50 -£75 a month (or sometimes no financial contribution at all required) but there will be a lot of care jobs to do esp in winter e.g. muck out stable, fetch horse from field/return to field, change rugs, make up haynets and feeds, scrub out and refill water buckets, poo pick and weed field, sweep yard, tidy muck heap, clean tack etc., maybe around a hour or an hour and a half's work a day not including riding time? The cons of this aside from the time required are these kinds of yards can lack the facilities of a more expensive like a floodlit arena and showjumps, in the winter she may struggle to ride in the evenings or may be limited to hacking or riding in the field only which is obviously tricky in the dark after school!

In the middle you'd have your part-livery option, where the owner pays the yard for some or all of the care of the horse, there may still be some jobs required but probably more along the lines of skipping out, changing rugs, grooming, topping up water and hay with perhaps more to do at the weekend, perhaps 30 mins work per share day in the evenings and an hour at weekends, not including riding time? Facilities for riding likely better and there may be yard staff around to lend a hand if she gets stuck although be wary of assuming they'll step into a parental/teaching role. The costs here usually equate to a % of the livery fee relating to how many days the sharer does, around here 5 day livery is around £500 pcm so a share would be in the region of £200 pcm for 2-3 days a week depending on the exact yard and arrangement.

At the top end is full livery where very few jobs are required and it's essentially turn up and ride, some light work required like light grooming, throwing in a ready made feed after riding and so on, but nothing taking significant time. Again usually nicer facilities so you can ride year round, often a good set of showjumps and a choice of different arenas, and if she gets very lucky there may even be an opportunity to go out to outside clinics and competitions if someone else on the yard is going out in their box and willing to take her for diesel money. Around here full livery at a fancy/competitive yard is £750-£1000 pcm so a share would be up to £500 pcm.

But like I say those are very rough costs and I am in the SE so it may be cheaper elsewhere. When doing your sums do factor in the costs of getting her to/from the yard and at least a monthly lesson, if she does want to compete or go on outings that's an expensive endeavour with transport and the kit required and entry fees etc (and finding a share horse she can compete/go off the yard on isn't easy as of course the owner will usually take priority) - again she may not have thought about this now or may swear blind if you allow her a share she'll never ask you for anything ever again (I've had teens!) but if/when she gets onto the yard and makes friends with a bunch of horse-owning friends who are off every weekend for fun rides and pony club and competitions it's totally natural that will be the next thing she's desperate for!

She’s the perfect age, but unfortunately I don’t think she has enough experience. I was 14/15 when I took on a loan horse but I’d been having riding lessons for around 8 years by that point. Sharing a horse could be a good first step, but even then, I’d give it a year or so. Taking a horse on loan means you are responsible for everything (obviously subject to the contract you have with the owner) but that means livery costs, stabling if needed, bedding if needed, feed, hay, farrier, insurance for yourself if riding in public, wormer, etc. And ideally she’d keep on with lessons cause it’s so easy to go backwards with your ability when you start riding unsupervised, bad habits creep in, confidence can easily be knocked, etc.

I totally agree with what everyone else has said , in particular that she needs to continue with lessons . Have you looked locally to see if there are any other riding schools with more opportunities to loan / progress . Personally I think it’s a good idea to try different instructors as riding schools vary immensely in the quality of teaching .

A bit late to comment but hopefully helpful! DD started riding when she was tiny (2) and we paid for lessons every week from4. Prior to that we paid for half an hour a week to take her out on a tiny pony! She helped out at stables every week from around 10. However our stables did horse management classes from about age 7 so all the children knew what was involved. Parents were also encouraged to take part, helping tack up etc. she was offered a loan at short notice aged 11 so we went for it on the basis of make or break. However very different from a riding stable horse to a loan where you are broadly on your own. For us it was a huge success. DD got up every morning at 6 so we could go to the yard and she was back after school, 365 days a year twice a day. We quickly leaned about costs involved. Age 12 she bought her first horse with money she had saved. Now 29 she has 2 and has had a great experience. However my thoughts are, do your homework, understand what’s involved, ensure your daughter understands what’s involved, understand the costs, the time spend etc. hope it works out whatever you decide.