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The tack room

Discuss horse riding and ownership on our Horse forum.

Adult new or returning riders up for a chat?

1000 replies

Hereforthedramaz · 09/07/2022 13:20

I have recently returned to riding after a very long gap.

I was a very casual rider as an early teen, happy hacking on plodding ponies rather than technical riding. I am thoroughly enjoying having proper lessons now.

I thought it might be nice to chat with other newbies or returners, all non-horsey people in my life and there is only so much they want to talk about it!!!

Also the stables I'm going to is so lovely and welcoming but, in their own words, aimed almost entirely at 8-12 year olds so it would be nice to talk to some adults!

OP posts:
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hennipenni · 19/11/2022 18:14

That sounds like a positive lesson @Hereforthedramaz

I hacked out today on my daughters friends horse with my daughter on her loan pony and her friend walking alongside us.
The mare was lovely and responsive without being too forward going. Thoroughly enjoyed myself and I’m very appreciative of the chance to ride her.

I dis however manage to fall off the muck heap and have badly bruised my knee and elbow, I’m on blood thinners so I’ll have some bruises by the morning! Just hoping that I’m able to have my lesson on Wednesday.

Hereforthedramaz · 19/11/2022 20:50

Oof @hennipenni that fall doesn't sound too fun on blood thinners, I hope you do manage to ride later in the week.

It is particularly lovely when you have momentum of a few good rides in quick succession!

Your daughter's friends mare sounds lovely. I know it really all comes down to my riding ability but the plodding school horses can get a tad frustrating. Sometimes I get to ride a lovely sports horse and he's so lovely and responsive

OP posts:
cakeforme · 19/11/2022 21:30

Sounds lovely to have the opportunity to hack out and borrow other ponies. This is what I miss about coming to riding later in life and just not knowing horse owning people.

Tupperwarelid · 25/11/2022 12:28

I rode without stirrups in my lesson last night. It must have been the first time I've done it in about 30 years and I only lasted 5 minutes with a couple of trots along the long side of the school. I felt so unbalanced it was unbelievable and my legs really hurt! I'm going to try and do a bit each lesson now to get more used to it again.

Shannith · 26/11/2022 09:42

Hello - I've had this thread on watch for ages and it's great.

Can I join in? I got back into riding 3 years ago at the age of 44. Rode as a child and on and off a bit and then nothing for years.

Horses have always been my passion but I have total imposter syndrome!

I share a quirky 14.2 cob and my friend has just stated letting me ride her ex competition horse - who at the age of 23 has slowed down sufficiently to be ridden by the likes of me.

I am doing our first pole clinic today and I'm bricking it.

cakeforme · 26/11/2022 17:03

@Tupperwarelid i hated no stirrups when I first started but now most of my lessons have some of this to help me get balance. As an oldie it’s improving very very slowly. It always so much better when the stirrups are back though so can see why it’s done. Yet my son who is nearly 12 rarely has to do it. When he did it was a whole lesson including canter 😱

cakeforme · 26/11/2022 17:05

@Shannith wow that sounds great to have two to ride. I love reading about people coming back to it but always makes me wish I’d started so many more years ago!

Shannith · 26/11/2022 17:35

@cakeforme thanks. They are very different t. One is at the small yard where I have lessons - she's a 14.2 cob (thinks she is a racehorse) who has 2 speeds, dawdle and wheeeeeeeee.

She's not easy, she's strong and built downhill - but she's taught me a lot. Quite a lot of bad habits. I had a terrible crisis of confidence last year as her canter is... interesting. And when she gets strong she's like a tank. Some days I had to drag myself to the yard with gritted teeth. I fell off quite a lot!

I've persevered but it really was a case of getting through it!

My friend's horse is just beautifully schooled. I've only sat on her 3 times and we are finding our feet. We did a pole clinic this with 2 of the other liveries. I was terrified but it was fun.

Steering is an issue, I so used to having to over do my aids that our serpentines looked like well imagine a massive snake rather than shallow loops down the centre line.

Shannith · 26/11/2022 18:29

@Tupperwarelid well done on the no stirrups. 5 mins is really impressive for a first go. Especially down the long side.

I did no stirrups November last year - and carried it on through most of December/January until a freshly clipped incident.Smile

I find it weirdly easier on a circle to start - because I am using my legs as aids so they have something to do. Easier to balance than on the long side to start with. I still do 10-20 mins at the start of every schooling session - before she gets ahem too forward to sit. It's when I appreciate her dawdle mode - too forward and I get unbalanced and start hanging onto her mouth.

It's made a massive, massive difference to my stickability. I built it up so I could 20-30 mins - starting with just a few mins and building ip every ride.

I actually ride better, and as a result, my mare goes better in walk and trot without them. Never thought I'd say that when I started.

What helps me is breathing (sounds weird but I forget), sitting up and down at the same time (if that makes sense) and feeling like you are leaning ever so slightly back with head up and shoulders back - and doing things that require me to use my legs.

Our leg yields are wayyyyyy better with no stirrups and it's helped to realise that a lot of the time it's me that causes any stuffiness.

It also made me drop my stirrups a hole.

But I don't recommend testing stickability without stirrups out on a freshly clipped horse on a cold, very windy January morning where both horse killing leaves and birds are in abundance. Unless you like whiplash that is. Don't know what I was thinking.

Gremlinsateit · 27/11/2022 04:35

Well, DHorse answered the raised pole vs canter question for me! I raised one end of the last pole slightly and he completely boggled at it (he has jumped before but not with me). Refused to go over it in hand, refused to go over any of them ridden, because it was all just too appalling. So the last pole is on the ground again and today we worked on canter 😂

Tupperwarelid · 27/11/2022 13:32

@Shannith thanks for the tips. I can't imagine riding a bend without them. I think I would slip off the side! I saw a photo of me riding and my stirrups looked so short, more like jumping length than flat work length. I mentioned it to by instructor and she made me ride without stirrups to try and help.

Gremlinsateit · 28/11/2022 02:28

@Shannith do you begin with no stirrups in walk then rising trot? what about sitting trot?

Pleasedontdothat · 29/11/2022 23:04

Third lesson back today and a much better lesson than last week. Last week I was on a quite stiff cob who made me work very hard - the instructor was a bit basic - it was essentially walk, trot canter on both reins and that was it so I didn’t really feel I’d learned anything or improved in any way. Today was with another instructor and back on the lovely responsive horse from the first week. She asked what I wanted to work on and I asked for help with my position (I was slightly tipping forward) - she immediately spotted I was gripping with my knees and as soon as I concentrated on keeping even weight through the balls of my feet that sorted my lower leg out … then we were doing lots of transitions, especially trot-halt without any walking in between. Then I asked for some no stirrups work and discovered I could do rising trot with no stirrups. When I got my stirrups back they immediately felt way too short and then the trot felt effortless 😊. I was buzzing afterwards so definitely feel I’m getting back into it

Shannith · 30/11/2022 09:07

@Gremlinsateit @Tupperwarelid

I always start in walk and use it was my warm up for me and the horse - so lots of walk/halt transitions, long and low, then collected up a bit, some leg yields, circles, spiralling in and out. It really helps me get into the swing of moving with her and relaxing into the saddle. I might leave it at that if she's in a I'm going to spook at my shadow move but then do it in trot.

Sitting trot always! Rising trot no stirrups is for other way better people than me.

I find trotting no stirrups down the long side much harder - but my horse is not very straight and I normally ride her off the track to work on this.

The thing with no stirrups for me is that no matter how much I do it, the first couple of minutes in trot can be a bit of fuck, bounce, wobble, grip with knees - but I remember to breathe, relax, do circles at the end of the school she's less likely to take a dislike to until suddenly it clicks.

So it's tempting to give up and say I can't do it because it's tricky for the first bit but it's worth carrying on - after 10 mins it's "normal". You just have to get over the scrappy bit to start with.

What I've found most interesting (I did it initially to give me some stickability) is I can feel how she finds some things easier - definitely does excellent leg yields, really free when I've got no stirrups- and less so, particularly on one rein when I take my stirrups back - establishing that the problem is me blocking her.

I find bend easier because I have to put my legs on - specifically my calves so it gives them something useful to do.

The other thing is that while I try very hard not to use the reins to balance myself - it does make me take up a shorter rein/better contact and if I can organise myself to then use this to ask her for inside bend, she finds it easier because I'm actually giving her something to work into.

Remember though this is on a horse I ride a lot so I'm used to her - I'd not be nearly so blasé on a horse I rode only occasionally.

When I was getting back into riding and having weekly lessons I insisted in doing at least 1/3 of the lesson mo stirrups because it's literally the fasted track to a good seat and having a feel of what's going on - which is natural to people to ah e ridden every day for 25 years - I'm playing catch up!

It worked really well until me and my instructor got carried away - I was riding a gorgeous ex dressage horse no stirrups- she she said, if you ask him he'll do a lovey medium to extended trot.

I did, he responded like the long suffering babe he was and I bounced right out of the saddle and splatted spectacularly onto the floor.

The few strides I sat felt amazing though and as falls go, it was a good one because he was doing the opposite of playing up - he did exactly what I asked.

It was a weird thing to do in a way - because I was paying for a lesson which I felt I wanted it to be fun all the time, not bloody no stirrups- but I stuck with it out of bloody mindedness until it was fun because I wanted desperately to get the point where I could share a horse and hack and whatnot and I knew if was the secret sauce.

Gremlinsateit · 30/11/2022 10:06

Thanks @Shannith ! I will try in walk when DHorse is feeling mellow, and see how we go.

Pleasedontdothat · 30/11/2022 10:43

@Shannith I didn’t think I could do rising trot with no stirrups but I’d been doing sitting trot for a while (and not bouncing around!) and my instructor said can you do rising trot now and much to my surprise suddenly found myself doing rising trot with no stirrups. I am a bit of a masochist and usually ask to do no stirrups work in lessons as it is so good for me (even if it doesn’t feel like it at the time 😬). I also find things like leg yield much easier with no stirrups - and then once I get them back everything feels like it’s flowing so much better - it’s definitely worth the initial pain!

Shannith · 30/11/2022 11:00

@Gremlinsateit I'm just about to go and ride now - and will check the mellowness or otherwise of horse and do the same.

@Pleasedontdothat you've inspired me to give it a go today - rising trot no stirrups. I shall blame you if I end up sliding out the side door Smile

Allthegoodnamestakken · 30/11/2022 13:55

Hello All, I have been insanely busy so haven't ridden since my last post 6 weeks ago! I have a lesson on Saturday with the advanced instructor who was very harsh on me last time so feeling pretty nervous about it as Its been so long and she really was quite fussy about how you ride, how the horse goes etc. great for learning a lot but not the best confidence boost.
Would appreciate any obliging vibes you could all send the horse I ride please 😂

Shannith · 30/11/2022 14:25

Completely forgot to do rising trot. No stirrups went well - however taking stirrups back went less well.

Asking for forward resulted in forward which quickly escalated to being a dick and trying to duck corners and canter when no aid to canter was given and refusing to canter when it was.

Most of the time when she does this it's my fault. Today it was her.

Still I then hacked my friends horse who is a sweetheart and restored my faith in horsekind.

Shannith · 30/11/2022 14:32

@Allthegoodnamestakken good luck to you and the horse.

I totally get you about the scary instructor and nerves - especially after a bit of time off.

My yard manager gave me lessons for a while - she done at really teach and is a proper dressage rider and she was fierce with me. Like rally, really. But she taught me loads.

If it makes you feel better I watched her have a lesson on her Advanced/prix st George horse and her trainer was equally fierce with her.

Telling her to do it again, that was shit, ride into the corners more and instant transitions.

It was hilarious and made me feel better. I'm just about scraping prelim level on one day a year if all the gods play fair so it was so interesting to see that the same principles apply no matter how far up the scales of training you go.

I used to get so nervous I'd be all fingers and thumbs tacking up. Especially if she was watching me.

Allthegoodnamestakken · 30/11/2022 15:25

@Shannith Thankyou that is a good way to look at it. This is also the yard owner and she does teach but normally the competition level riders not ones like me who are fumbling about trying to remember how the hell they used to event 10 years ago. The usual instructor I have is also pretty pedantic about how I ride but is much more gentle in her approach and explanations.

DrHildegardeLanstrom · 30/11/2022 18:09

Hi everyone. Great to see how you are all getting on. I like a fierce teacher - as long as it's justified.
I'm feeling a bit shit after my unplanned dismount. I'm giving myself a hard time about falling off and being shit (triggered for some reason by the instructor saying "I really thought you were going to stay on").
Then actually being injured at the age of 42 has worried me. I am the only one who drives in the family, DP is disabled, DD is autistic, DS needs to get to places; they all rely on me to keep things going. The whiplash was hard enough, what if I really hurt myself? Going back to riding is my little indulgence and it just feels a bit...risky and self centred.
I know I am over-worrying but it's just been a bit of a wake up call. I'm putting off booking my next lesson....

Notanotherwindow · 30/11/2022 18:43

Do any of you please have any advice on getting over a fear of one horse in particular? Especially when it is based on absolutely nothing.

He started out as my usual lesson horse although I've always been a bit wary of him as he is known for being grumpy and occasionally nips or half-heartedly kicks at you when tacking up. Then he went lame for about a month with laminitis and I was riding a different horse who is his polar opposite and just so sweet.

Now he is sound and being used in lessons again and I can barely bring myself to go near him. I can't tack him up, was nearly in tears mounting him. I'm terrified of him. He's never done anything. I've never fallen from him, he's never played me up.

New horse I've fallen once when dismounting and he has spooked with me twice although I stayed on both times but I absolutely trust him and I'm not nervous getting on him, will go into his stall to cuddle him, brush him and tack up.

My instructor has made me get back on scary horse as she insists she isn't going to let me develop more of a fear of him even if we do the whole lesson on lead rein (I wasn't on the lunge or anything with him before) and I feel so bad being so afraid as it isn't his fault, he's a lovely horse.

Shannith · 30/11/2022 19:40

@DrHildegardeLanstrom I'm so so glad I found this thread - as I know exactly what you mean.

When I first started sharing my mare she had me off 4-5 times. But that was more me falling off randomly.

But now I'm more proficient I've fallen of twice. Once about a year ago and once a couple of weeks ago.

Both times she did a spook/spin while seemingly trotting along happily.

I've sat worse from her - BUT everything you are feeling about responsibility and guilt I had too. If I fell off when I was 12 I bounced and jumped back on.

I don't bounce anymore but I do still get straight back on because... it's a Pavlovian response!

I had whiplash both times, even through I technically had time to remember to fall softly and tuck and roll a bit. And it set off a whole load of stuff. The realisation that this is a dangerous hobby and that I could 1. Do real damage in my old age and 2. Do minor damage that still had a massive impact on my family/work responsibilities.

I've still got the jelly wobbles since my last fall - which I absolutely know makes me more likely to fall off again as I get tense and ride defensively.

I was actually so bad at one point last year that I had to do some rider specific NLP lol g at the root cause of my fears and replacing then with good thoughts.

What actually worked was the fierce instructor who made me push through it and if in doubt ask for more forward. But since falling off 2 weeks ago I'm slightly back in the "what if" zone. Dammit

Shannith · 30/11/2022 19:48

@Notanotherwindow that's a tricky one. If it was your horse or a share horse then absolutely you have to work through it. My share horse scares me sometimes. She tried to bite me today - she picks up on the tiniest bit of nerves from me.

But and it's a big but - this is a lesson horse. Other horses that give you confidence are available and you are a paying customer.

Riding is supposed to be FUN. Not putting yourself in situations that forever reason you feel unsafe in. Like @DrHildegardeLanstrom and me - we don't bounce so much anymore and there are repercussions. And being tense and scared of a horse makes the risk worse.

So if I were you I'd say a firm no, I will not ride that horse. You are not a 12 year old pony club gal who has to just crack on and ride the naughty ones. You are a grown arse woman and this is supposed to be a joyful hobby.

Returning to riding for me is all about building confidence. So don't ride that horse. Or tack it up. Lots of other horses to learn on.

Funnily enough, writing that out has helped me firm up my decision to stop sharing my mare.

My job is changing and I won't have as much time in the week - I've got my friend's fab horse I can hack and have lessons on and I might try out one of the bigger schools near me to be some experience of riding lots of different things under my belt.

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