Can experienced riders give me some advice on riding lesson situation

[Ginandcolic]

Hello all,

I would appreciate some advice from experienced riders on some situations I've encountered at a riding school. Quick background: I used to ride a lot in my teens / early twenties then stopped so I am very rusty (at best). My daughter (10 yo) started riding last summer and has regular one to one lessons - I will join in occasionally but very much just fit in with what she's doing.

About six months ago, DD was in a lesson riding a pony she knows well - he's a really good pony and tries hard to do what he's asked. The only time she had ever had trouble before was when she was learning the right way of asking for things eg he didn't realise she wanted him to canter because she hadn't got the signals quite right.

In the lesson in question, the instructor had five trotting poles on the ground very close together - if I was walking over them, I would only need one step between them. I've always seen them much more spread out (eg 3 pony paces between them). The pony is about 14hh.

The pony tried to walk over them but ended up knocking into them and getting flustered. He was raising his hooves so not dragging them but just seemed to get confused by how to walk over them all.

He then refused to go over them again (which I kind of understood given he'd had a difficult time with them before) and DD was uncomfortable trying to make him as he'd never refused to do anything before so she didn't want to push him.

DD got quite upset at the instructor trying to make her make the pony go over the poles again and I was worried that the stress wasn't doing anyone any good. I have never commented / intervened in one of DD's lessons before but I suggested to the instructor that things were getting a bit stressful so maybe they could end the lesson there or move on to something else.

I've also experienced something similar where I've been told to whip the horse I was riding to get him to do something he obviously was uncomfortable doing - I was being asked to go over a combination of jumps where I felt one of the angles was too sharp for him as he is quite big (tall and heavy set). Again, he had never refused to do anything before so he's not a stubborn horse who needs a strong hand.

I wasn't happy doing it so I said I'd rather just end the lesson or just go straight to a cool down (we were almost at the end anyway).

At no point did I suggest not paying the full price for the lessons and I was very happy to do so.

Can I ask for thoughts? Am I being a bit too precious and DD and I should just have made our pony / horse do what we were asking? I don't know if I am being a bit of a wuss and should have pushed through.

Thanks all!

i don’t agree with leathering them for not helping out a riders mistake but equally neither task sounds hard and while I hate a rough rider I also hate watching ineffectual riders who are a bit wet

In this case its a 10 year old little girl who had been riding a few months at most, being asked to take a tricky line into a fence. Of course she was ineffectual. She's a beginner and doesn't know how to ride effectively. She shouldn't even have been jumping yet if she wasnt secure in canter, imo, let alone working out difficult lines into the jump. So i think it's a bit harsh to call a beginner child wet for not pushing a pony further than she was comfortable with.

You've misunderstood Soul, there were two separate incidents if you re read the op's posts. The little girl who is just learning to canter was going over some trot poles on the ground albeit for some reason in walk, and got upset when the pony knocked them with his feet. The op who is an adult and has been riding on and off since a child was the one jumping 'at a tight angle' having previously successfully jumped bigger fences on an easier line. Op felt the horse was struggling with the line and/or was tired and fed up of jumping. Both sound like perfectly reasonable tasks for their level of experience to Mr, obviously op's Spidey senses are going off about this teacher and she wants to try someone else/a different school which is perfectly sensible as it goes, but I don't think OP or anyone else is really suggesting they were being inappropriately pushed for their stage of learning?

I wasn’t calling them wet I was saying as a general rule they might need to learn to start pushing horses past things. It was more a general observation from decades and decades of experience… and dealing with several problems caused by riders
My point was the school they are with sounds shite, yes, but being expected to not just let a horse stop dead at some poles is not an outlandish request or over doing the riders ability, and that not wanting to ride competitively doesn’t mean they never have to ask their horse a question.