First morning without dpony...

[coffeeebean]

He was put to sleep yesterday after 15 years in the family. We grew up together (im mid 20s now), he was my whole world. Waking up this morning and not heading straight off to the yard to feed him is so surreal I don't know what to do with myself. I miss my sweet boy so much i really can't believe he's gone.

@coffeeebean I am so sorry, it's heartbreaking when our pets die. Sending you lots of love x

I am so sorry, we lost our beloved Shetland in February and I had a good cry about it yesterday. I miss him so much.
I hope you are taking care of yourself. They mean so much to us.

I'm sorry. It's not my world, I don't know what to say, but such a loss must be devastating. Perhaps be actively kind to yourself, not just today but for a few months ahead.

It’s such an awful feeling isn’t it? Comfort yourself in remembering the good times you had with him and remember that you made that terrible decision to PTS because it was best for him. That was the kindest thing you have ever done.
Did you get some of his tail? Look into jewellery if you did, or find a beautiful frame for a favourite photo. Try to do something positive today.
Don’t rush to clear away his things, store them away for the time being.

Thank you all for your replies. I know its going to hurt for a while but it was the right thing to do. It's just so hard to wrap my head around it....realistically i knew he wasn't going to live forever but just always thought he'd be there. He's been there through everything. My first and last day of school, my first heartbreak, when I failed my driving test, he inspired my university dissertation etc etc. I thought hed be there to walk me down the aisle and to teach my kids to ride. So silly of me really. I just want to bury my face in his neck and smell him again. Through all the hard times in my life he's been the one I cried too and now he can't be there when I need him the most. I am going to get some jewellery with his ashes I think, so I can at least have that with me forever. I feel like a part of me is missing.

Crikey, you have taken me back. It will be 20 years next year that I lost my first pony.
Like yours, he was my ear during the ups and downs of romance, just an unwavering presence. I moved him up country with me and he kept me sane when I knew nobody.

I had a piece of jewellery made of his hair, a lovely ring from House of Salmi but by far my most precious memory is a painting I have of him.
Be gentle on yourself, it took me weeks not to feel his aching loss.

This has brought a tear to my eye. I'm so sorry.

I am so sorry. I lost my horse of a lifetime 20 years ago, and I remember the shock and sheer rawness of it all. Time will make things easier, but for now, be kind to yourself and do what feels right for you.

So sorry OP. It bloody hurts doesn't it.

I just really want to give him a cuddle

I'm sorry OP. I lost my old boy recently. It helps to know that he had a long and happy life. I have some beautiful photos taken by a professional photographer. Grief is a process - there's no way round it. Your grief is a product of your love for him,.

It does gradually ease although it can still sideswipe you even months and years later. Also remember that in a sense he will be there for you still when you need him. All the strength he gave you and the things he taught you will still be there. He's a part of who you are now. Treasure that and carry his memory with you.

I’m so sorry - be nice to yourself and give yourself time to grieve

So sorry for your loss, it's such a hard thing to deal with as they are both a pet and a lifestyle. It changes everything when they are not there. I lost my first horse over 7 years ago and was just thinking a few days ago how much I still miss him.

sorry for your loss. I still dream about my childhood pony and I'm over 40