Tips on owning a first horse

[jan9876]

I used to ride and help out with horses when I was a teenager for a few years, and it has always been my dream to own a horse. Now I have an 8 year old dc who absolutely loves horses and riding, she has been getting lessons for a year now. My dc is quite vulnerable as she has adhd and mild autism, and I am worried for her teenage years - I think if she had a horse it would help keep her out of trouble and give her something positive and therapeutic to focus on. I have made a few enquiries and have found a livery yard that offers a very decent rate compared to other places. They said they would come with me to help choose a pony. The only thing is they don't have an indoor, and I live in a very rainy place!! Is this going to be very frustrating or is it ok, do people just go out riding in all weathers?

I would appreciate some advice... I know it is a big financial commitment and we are counting all the costs before we do this. For those who own a pony - is it worth it? Is it hard finding the time to go up every day to the stables? What are the drawbacks - I was thinking if we wanted to go on holiday we could just pay the livery yard a bit more to take care of the pony. And I was hoping to try to find a pony/horse that my daughter and I could both ride. It is all a bit of a minefield!! Any tips/food for thought is welcome.

I would probably suggest dipping your toe in the water with lots of support before buying your own. It's a huge, huge responsibility and a lot of work unless they're on full livery. Is there a riding school or an RDA near you? Your DC could try out a pony share for a few months? Also, what's your level of experience?

My circumstances are very similar to yours and as much as I'd love to own a pony for my daughter I think it would be madness for us to do it before loaning /sharing for a while at first. I'm going to approach the fantastic riding school shes been going to for the last 3 years and see about loaning one of their ponies a couple of days a week. Then if the passion and commitment continues, which I am 99.9% sure it will, we'll look at getting her a pony
She's not interested in whizzing around a show ring or jumping, its more being close to the animal and therapeutic for her so a riding school plod should be perfect for her.

....have deep pockets!

We have had our DCs first pony for 6 weeks now. She took a while to find (posted on here for tips). We were looking to buy but were offered an older pony on loan from just down the road. It’s been an ideal set up for all.

We’re on a yard and have gone full livery. I had my own ponies as a teen but I’ve forgotten so much. It’s be brilliant to have their help and support. We go and muck out every day as I want the kids to do as much as they can but I like to know as the nights close in, we have that support. We might change to DIY but for the moment this works for us.

We are also at a yard without an indoor school but we have a walker, outdoor schools and loads of off road hacking. We have also bought an old but well cared for box so we can go to indoor schools for lessons and pony club etc.

If she’s having lessons, it’s worth contacting her riding school to see if they would let her loan one day a week as a gentle intro, especially over winter when riding will be minimal.

Good luck

For my dd, having her own horse is a lifeline - she has severe anxiety and the yard is her happy place. I am extremely glad we took the plunge and bought him for her.

However ... in your situation I would hold fire for a while. It is expensive - however much you think it’s going to cost, double it!! It is an enormous responsibility - at 8, your dd is too young to be left at the yard on her own, so will need to be supervised by an adult at all times (horses can be very dangerous). If she’s only been having lessons for a year, your dd will be very much a beginner - a few more years at a riding school, learning how to ride lots of different ponies will make her a much better rider and more able to get the most out of having her own. Unless she is a particularly big 8 year old and you are a particularly small adult, it would be tricky to find a pony which would suit you both - and what she’d need now would be very different from the horse she’ll need as a teenager.

There are lots of ways of getting a horsey fix without jumping straight into having her own. If she’s having weekly lessons, could you increase that to twice-weekly? (Still miles cheaper than owning your own!). Going on riding holidays once things are a bit more normal is great too - my dd went on the junior riding holidays at Wellington in Hampshire for several years and loved every second. Joining the Pony Club as a centre member and doing stable management badges etc. Volunteering at city farm stables or your local riding for the disabled association when she’s old enough.

My dd had to wait until she was 15 to have her own as we couldn’t make the logistics work before then. We did everything we could to ensure she got as much time in the saddle as possible before then and she really appreciates having her own now.

PS the yard where DD’s horse is kept doesn’t have an indoor school (not many yards do), and she rides him all through the winter in everything but horizontal rain. Good gloves and insulated boots are a must for winter riding 👍🏻

wow thank you for all these replies, they are so helpful. To answer a few questions, I am quite experienced and am able to ride a variety of horses, I have forgotten how to put a bridle on but I'm sure that will come back to me and the yard seems very supportive! I live in Northern Ireland and have looked extensively for a way to loan/pony share and there doesn't seem to be anything like that here, maybe I am looking in the wrong places. I am quite small and my daughter is a very tall and strong 8 year old, she is in 10-11 clothes.

I understand that the pony that will suit now as a beginner will be different from the one that will suit when she is older though. And it is true that she wouldn't be able to be left up to the yard on her own, she would probably need supervision for more years than most kids due to her adhd - she doesn't think sometimes!

After reading these messages I think holding off and doing some riding holidays/ upping her lessons would be a good start (I am dying to go on a riding holiday with her lol) At the minute she only goes riding once a fortnight and has a one to one lesson. It feels really hard though as it is only an hour a time and she isn't getting to feed/groom/muck out. And there just isn't the same opportunities there used to be with being allowed to help out at stables/riding schools!

I am pretty torn. But I think I need to be sensible and take the good advice here!

To increase how regularly she gets her horsey fix you could increase her lessons to weekly and do an hour riding one week and an hour stable management the next week? My daughter does a half hour each week private lesson but every so often she'll do an hour - 30 mins riding and 30 mins stable management. Our riding school are fab and if the horse isn't getting used for the next lesson they let her untack, get its Jammies on and turn out. So actually a 30 min lesson turns in to an hours lesson anyway!!! We are also loaning a mini from the school just now, gives her that therapeutic time grooming and pampering a pony but on a much smaller scale and if we die get up to exercise her one day it doesn't matter as she's out running with her herd in the massive field anyway.

What a typo, if we die is meant to read if we don't get up...

I understand why some are advising to wait but personally, if you can afford it then I say go for it.

We got our pony to help our DC and they had been riding regularly for 2 years (now 8 and 7). I’ve had my own ponies as a teen which was very much my thing. This time around it’s now a family hobby. But it’s more than a hobby, and owning a pony is more than just riding.

In the 6 weeks we had ours, we’ve done so much together. The kids love mucking out, grooming, cleaning tack, poo picking the fields, spending time at the yard. And if they feel like it, we’ll ride. Usually 3 times a week. We might go in the school or we’ll hack out with a picnic and collect blackberries. I’m loving this as much as them.

My DS has mild ADHD and has found riding to be very useful. He’s much calmer when he’s riding which is incredible for him.

We’ve got a 12.2hh 22 year old Welshie. She’s a doll. My son is a very tall 8 year old and strong too. He was riding a 14hh at the stables and so I do fancy getting a share for us. We were advised to buy the pony that’s right for us now, not for the future. I I’m so glad we listened. You want a safe and steady pony that you learn a lot from. If your DD progresses then you move on, that’s what happens.

Costs are a huge factor and the night before ours arrived, I was awake all night worrying about everything. But she came and the sky didn’t fall down. She stood, ate some hay and the kids hugged her for ages. And we just took it all in. Honestly, I keep thinking it’s the best therapy there is.

I budget £500 for our for full livery and extras. She’s not shod and lives on air. But we have money for new saddles etc should something crop up. Maybe over the next few months putting a set amount aside a month - whatever the cost of livery, food, insurance etc is - and see how you get on. In that time, up the lessons, and get looking. It might take a while to find the right pony and it’s good to get out and try a few to test your criteria.

If you have forgotten how to put a bridle on, then horse owning will be a huge step.

Obviously things will come back to you, but it is a living animal that will have to bear the brunt of your mistakes (or possibly your DD if you don't tack up correctly and she falls off because of it). Ill fitting tack, just as an example, can cause pain and injuries.

If you can afford full livery, then fair enough, but if you intend to be doing most of the care, then I would try to find somewhere you can get some experience with horses again first. Riding schools aren't able to do much stable management at the moment due to Covid, but you might be able to find a charity or RDA group to volunteer with? Or ask the riding school if it would be possible to get some stable management lessons.

If you haven't ridden in quite a while, I'd also suggest some lessons for yourself! You might have been confident years ago, but it is likely you will feel very rusty when you first get back on- which won't be ideal for trying ponies etc.

Why not give it 6 months of more lessons for your daughter, lessons for you and stable management lessons if you can get them, then reassess? Spring is a much nicer time to buy a pony, anyway!

Do you actually have lessons yourself at the moment OP because there is a huge leap between ‘I helped out with horses and rode as a teenager ‘ to ‘ I am quite experienced and can ride a variety of horses’ , particularly if you can’t even remember how to tack up . Being completely responsible for a horse is a massive learning curve if you’ve never done it and I would suggest that you find a pony club centre for your daughter and a decent riding school for yourself where they will let you learn / practice your stable management skills . Some riding schools also do share / loans of their ponies / horses which may be a good place to start .

Aw, yeah definitely up your own experience before getting your own OP. I've come back to riding after a break having my girls and have been surprised what a re-learning curve it's been. I could remember how to do everything, but the doing it all has been much harder than it was when I was younger. We've got a share atm and 3/4 days per week is MORE than enough.

Sorry, if you’re that experienced I don’t understand how you can ever have forgotten how to put a bridle on...

mumto it sounds like it has been such a lovely positive experience for you and your family. That is what I wanted - it to be a family activity being outdoors, and less time spent being 'bored' on phone/tv screens.

I have rode a few times a year over the past few years, Im 38 so it has been a long time since I was a teenager. I feel that I am still a confident rider, however because I'm always getting a lesson at a riding school, they always have the horse tacked up for me and so I don't get a chance to do this. I probably would remember straight away, I guess because I haven't done it in 20 years Im not confident with the bridle. Honestly this is not an issue because like I said the yard is very supportive and will help me the first few times. Sorry if you don't understand that Happy. I agree Apple - I am underestimating what it is going to be like doing everything again, so I need to contact a few places and see about stable management, helping out etc before I take the leap. I can afford it and will have help so I do want the richness that owning our own pony will bring to our lives, maybe I just need to wait a little bit longer and really see what Im getting myself into.

I would look for a sharer first to be honest.

Finding the right yard is key. A supportive, friendly yard will make all the difference. Many riding instructors, grooms and stable hands will tell you that the horses are not a problem only the people they attract.

Good luck and may you have many happy horse hours together!

OP in the nicest way, if you have only ridden in a riding school you aren’t experienced at all.

You need to try own a pony days, riding holidays, get a real feel for it and then decide if it is right for you!

Thank you Emeeno!

last... I understand what you are saying, but I haven't only ridden in a riding school. From when I was around 15 to 20 I took care of a friends 2 horses as she had health issues. I had full experience of looking after them but without the total responsibility/bills etc. I also have been on a few riding holidays. I also helped with the lessons at a riding school. It just feels a very long time ago now! And I have just started riding again the past few years. I feel like I'm still confident on a horse, and obviously would be wanting a very stable horse and would need to brush up on skills, but I feel like the foundations are there.....

I'm making enquiries about loaning a pony 2 days a week, I think that would be a good starting point. I am not going to rush into buying a pony.

I have made a few enquiries and have found a livery yard that offers a very decent rate compared to other places.

Be just a little bit cautious here. There is always a reason a yard is charging less than market rate.

It is in a cheaper area for everything in general and also no indoor so hopefully that explains it but will double check!

I have a 12 year old DD with anxiety and Aspergers/ASD (and being assessed for ADHD) - getting a pony was the best thing we ever did. But...

I would build up gradually because it is hard work and expensive and if your DD is like mine is best not to take on too much at once! DD like yours started with 1-2-1 lessons, then built up to group lessons, pony club and then loaning. We then upped the loaning so that we were there 5 days a week and doing more in terms of stable management, responsibility for the pony etc.

Even so, it was a huge adjustment to owning. We are there 5 days a week, sometimes 6, and it takes up every weekend and most days after school. The expense is eye watering - DD has a lot of lessons because she needs that structure. But it is her life - it is the one place she feels happy and safe, and I don't know where we would be without it.

DD started learning very early. I used to ride but was not experienced. We eventually got a loan when she was 11 and at 12 she bought her own with money saved - we paid the bills. We had part livery at the local stables but every morning up at 6 to do turnout, then after school and holidays 365 days per year. 15 years later her first horse has gone with her to Uni and she still has her and has bought another. It’s been fantastic as she ( and us) have given 100%. But it is expensive and an injured horse costs as much to keep as one in 100% health! My advice? Don’t think about buying a pony unless you are prepared to be 100% committed.