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wwyd-horse,baby,full time job

16 replies

feekerry · 11/09/2012 21:40

I have a dd who is 5 months. I have a horse who is at best a happy hack due to injury. I'm due back at work next wear but have just been told i'm being relocated to a new office about 1 hour from my home. I'm having to go back full time so realistically i'll be out of house 8am till 6pm 5 days a week. I will rarely see my dd let alone my horse. My yard is diy and they can live out but obv still need daily haylage etc. Am I destined to going yr to yard at 9pm at night to chuck haylage over fence. I've thought about loan or share but he's barely sound and a light hack only so not top of someones list. My previous office was in the same town that I live in and horse is stabled in. I'm gutted. Can I make this work? I cant see that I can :-(

OP posts:
ExitPursuedByABear · 11/09/2012 21:44

I don't know - it doesn't sound like it does it? Can they live out all year? Mine has come in tonight for the winter Sad. Is there someone who could help with him or maybe consider finding a loan home for him as a companion? But don't rush into anything. In my view things have a way of working out for the best.

Good luck.

surroundedbyblondes · 11/09/2012 21:51

You never know. I'd love to help out with caring for a horse in return for an occasional (boring) hack. I lost my nerve riding when I was pregnant with DD1 (before I knew I was pregnant) but my live for horses in general is just as strong as when I was a pony mad teenager. Sadly I suspect we live nowhere near each other Sad

DolomitesDonkey · 11/09/2012 21:52

Full livery. 2 under 2, working ft, husband on shifts, own business - was only way.

feekerry · 11/09/2012 22:01

Thank you for replies. Sadly I couldn't afford full livery. Ye they can live out but I would be dragging haylage feed rugs etc out in the pitch black at god knows what time. I do have some help as my mum has a horse at same yard but cant and dont want to rely on her for everything. Plus manually its a lot of hard work for her and she'll be looking after my dd whilst i'm at work. I just cannot see a way thru this. God, at this rate i'm only going to see my dd for 1 hour when I get in before she goes to bed. :-(

OP posts:
Treblesallround · 11/09/2012 22:17

Hang in with it feekerry, the winter will be grim, but then it will be spring and it will get better. You're probably not going to find your horse a new home so just get through it however you can. Rug up, fling hayage, drop standards. Will be OK!

Mspontipine · 11/09/2012 22:22

I'd try a little local advertising - shops, local paper etc. I believe there would be people willing to help look after him and a bit of light riding because they love horses so much it would be a little like having one of their own.
I would :) (where are you btw??)

ExitPursuedByABear · 11/09/2012 22:52

Can work force you to move an hour away? Sounds pretty dreadful when you are returning from maternity leave.

mielebosch · 11/09/2012 22:57

Agree with Mspontipine and Surroundedbyblondes.

Floralnomad · 12/09/2012 00:46

If you can't afford full livery find a yard that does assisted DIY . Does he usually live out all year, if not that seems a little unfair just because you no longer have time for him. Sorry if this sounds harsh . Obviously your first priority should be your child but you knew you were going back to work and even without the extra travel involved dealing with your horse all winter was going to be hard so why have you left it so late to deal with the issue.

Abbicob · 12/09/2012 08:37

I was very similar to this but had a very helpful and understanding husband who went up on a morning and sorted and I did on an evening. We managed this for 3 years and I have now switched yards to full livery. Check around because full livery does not have to be so expensive. Mine costs me £75 a week and includes everything except exercise. After adding everything up on diy I am paying only about £15 a week more than on diy

feekerry · 12/09/2012 09:24

Floralnomad thank you for your comments, not harsh at all. he partially lives out every year as he's not been in full work since his injury and its probably better for his joints to be out, actually most of his mates live out. he's in the minority by coming in. however, i dont always find living out any easier, lugging haylage across a frozen muddy field aint that easy!!!
re your comments about going back to work, my previous job was in the same village as yard and was 'flexible' hours. so i was planning on doing 7 til 3 and work a saturday and have one day off in lieu in the week. i was advised yesterday that my current role has been dispanded (not just me, across the board) and i will be offered a job in the new business. this is 9-5, full time, no flexible hours etc. the closest office is about 40 mins from my home.

was in shock when i posted this yesterday. suppose i'll just have to suck it up and make it work one way or the other as i cried myself to sleep last night at the thought of him having to go. like i said my mum has a horse at the same yard so no point in us both going up twice a day so we can come to some arrangement maybe. i'm also not actually going back till feb now so worst of winter will be over by then..... kind of!!!!

OP posts:
ExitPursuedByABear · 12/09/2012 10:33

Poor you feek that sounds really shit of your employer. I am sure your Mum will help out - and keep remembering that this too will pass. My DD spent hours strapped in her car seat as a baby whilst I did the horse. She is now a strapping 12 year old who helps me out enormously.

Floralnomad · 12/09/2012 15:07

I hope it all works out for you I do appreciate how difficult it is , we had to move 3 of our horses on to full livery when I was pregnant with my first DC and it was very hard.

Equimum · 12/09/2012 20:57

Are there any yards near you that offer live out part livery. I know that ssound as like a contradiction in terms, but the yard where we keep our horse only does part livery, and horses that live out are given hay, brought in for farrier/vet tc, checked daily etc. our yard charges about half cost of live- in part, which includes small amount of hard feed when exercised and full uses of facilities. Most people on this basis don't get to yard every day.

AllPastYears · 12/09/2012 21:33

Is there nowhere that does grass livery? Would this suit your horse? My horse is at grass livery, and there is no haylage dragging (YO puts hay out in winter), no poo-picking (fields get rotated and harrowed), no daily bringing in and out as he's in a field 24 hours, all year round.

marge2 · 13/09/2012 12:44

I have sililar situation, But my kids are both at school. I only manage to get to the yard once a week. If the horse was younger and didn't have chronic navicular among other issues, I would sell her. I can't really make it work, but I am very luck that the yard are really kid and provide a pretty much full livery service for part livery fees.

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