Feeling sad about leaving

[ThePerkyCoralPoet]

I’m leaving in January. This is quite big for me as someone autistic I am not very accepting of change but I was feeling let down and unsupported by SLT at my current school.

I havent yet told any students im leaving. I have gone home some nights and cried. I genuinely realky care for all of them. They are fantastic and very hard work at times but i could not ask for a better bunch, and now im leaving them.

These last two weeks i have had a new student who joined my class say randomly lovely things like “miss I have learnt so much recently you make me love the subject” or they will all just generally make me laugh or smile.

I feel a mix of guilt and sadness but also work feels surreal lately, like im physically here, but mentally detached.

Is this normal? How do you ease the feelings of guilt?

I didn’t want your post to go unanswered, but I know how you feel. However, I’m sorry that don’t really have any useful advice.

I’m just about to resign from my job as a TA, simply because at the secondary school I work at, we also have to be exam invigilators (to save money). I absolutely loathe this aspect of the role, although I love being a classroom TA.

So I don’t have any choice, because the pressure to not make mistakes in exams, has become unbearable for me. The simple truth is; no one cares when you are made to feel like crap, but have done precisely nothing wrong.

I don’t even have another job lined up, and when I do, it won’t be in education!

So I feel your pain. And I will probably cry when I tell my lovely students I’m leaving.

The biggest part of this that makes the struggle so real for me is I’m leaving them mid year. I’ve had them for a long time. Even my newer ones. I just feel really weird at the moment. It’s like a strange limbo phase where I feel useless at work and ready to get kit at the same time.

Every time they say anything like “can’t believe how much you’ve helped me” etc. I realise I’m about to leave them and they’re probably going to be stuck with supply.

I can absolutely imagine it is a tough time for you especially as you are ND.

It seems that you are a teacher that has made a real good impact on their students. That said though, you really should not feel guilty, people move on in their careers all the time - they should be understandable.

Just don’t have second thoughts and realise you are leaving because of the SLT and not the students.

One thing I would like to add though is, when they find out you are leaving they may ask for your details to keep in contact/if they can add you on social media. It’ll be an awkward conversation but it will be a no (unless SF over 18) - even though you’re not employed by the school when you leave, you still have to maintain your professional integrity.

You should not give out your personal contact details and they’ll have no reason to have your new work contact details also.

At least you are moving onto better things as a HOD, OP.

I thought she'd already started!