How to address an embarrassing issue

[Lilllypad11]

My ex cheated on me last year. Since then I’ve noticed a change, one that might warrant a trip to the local clinic. He has obviously been sleeping around.

I have to go to the clinic. The only appointment is on Thursday at 2:30 which is 30 mins before the end of the day but I’d need to be out at 2.

I am so painfully embarrassed and I refuse to explain this to my employer. They always want proof of where we go because people have abused the system.

I simply do not want to disclose my intimate health to my employer. Not only is it embarrassing enough that my ex cheated but this is worse.

How the hell do I explain? Please help me?

"I have a medical appointment. It cannot be at another time. Yes it's urgent"

And how will I manage if they ask for any form of proof? It’s disgustingly embarrassing. As, yes I have an appointment, but it won’t be with my GP.

Fill in the form. Write ‘gynaecological appointment’ in the reasons section. No one will ask for more. If they do, photocopy your appointment letter; it won’t have any details on it.

There’s no letter!

Then you write what I said before and if they ask, you say "it's a personal medical condition"
or "gynae". That usually stops the questions.

Just to clarify. I did all this. It didn’t stop the questions. Nor the admin staff saying “we cannot grant this without proof”

So show them the proof? 🤷🏻‍♀️

It will just say the appointment time and location. Presumably of a perfectly legitimate clinic where women frequently go for gynae appointments? At worst, they’ll think you’re pregnant or getting the coil, but honestly, they don’t care. Just follow the school procedure, get the time off, get your treatment.

It’s a full on STI clinic!

I don't know what you want us to say. Either you show the letter or you don't.

I don't believe it's the admin person's decision to make anyway - so go to the head.

🤷🏻‍♀️

Firstly, I bet the name of it isn’t “Town STI Clinic’; it’ll be called ‘The Rose Centre’ or something equally non-descript.

Secondly, ‘adult goes to medical appointment’ is a total non-issue.

Either do the admin you need to, and go. Or don’t, and don’t. There’s no more advice we can give you.

I go to the STI clinic to have my coil fitted- they offer lots of services.

I understand why you're worried but your embarrassment is clouding your judgement on this one. There is absolutely nothing about this appointment which will scream STI to them. You know what it's for, and therefore you're assuming they definitely will too. They absolutely won't. It's a gynecological appointment. Nothing more, nothing less.

I'm quite shocked how intrusive they're being, but there's no way they'll be able to work out what the appointment is for so please stop worrying.

Most STI clinics are walk ins. You could throw a sickie and get a test then if none are available during the weekend. One day of work requires no doctor letter.

I had an appointment for a reason I did not want to disclose to my employer. I used a blur app to blur out the contents of the letter besides the date and the time. The NHS header showed it was a trustworthy source and she accepted it.