Please help! Work making me sick with anxiety.

[Astridastro]

I work 3 days a week although I’ve never really worked 3 it’s always been more like 5. Anyway last year I was job sharing and I didn’t get on with my job share partner we were very different she was strict on discipline almost bordering on cruel I am more nurturing. This year she asked to be the class covering teacher she got put back in class and I became the class covering teacher. I never knew where I was day to day. The HT talk to me like dirt, she is very unsupportive I feel like if I say anything to her she snaps back at you.

I took some time off due to stress last year and now I’ve returned it’s just the same. In the meantime I’ve picked up a few supply days in another school and so far I’m really enjoying it. I wish I could just stay at this other school. Of course HT is not happy with me working at another school (she’s worried about my physical health apparently)

Im scared to talk to HR and ask about the possibility of a transfer I don’t even know if it could be done. I’m also scared the HT will blacken my name too. It’s not just her it’s sone colleagues as well I’ve been gossiped about and don’t feel I have any work friends anymore (not that you go to work to make friends) but there’s no one I can chat to in the staffroom anymore. I just don’t want to be there.

It sounds like you should leave. I’m in a similar position myself in a toxic work environment and the stress, anxiety and burnout has unfortunately gotten too much and I have had to take sick leave.
When I feel like I can cope better again, I plan on resigning from that role come Easter (to hand a notice in by 28th Feb). I’m sure you’re a hardworking and kind, caring teacher; there ARE better schools out there who will value you.
hand a notice in, do your best while you’re there and continue to make a good impression in the supply school…could there be a job opportunity there?

No workplace is worth sacrificing your mental wellbeing for. Take care of yourself ♥️

I definitely want to leave. I am actually contemplating handing in my notice and just going on the supply list but I know that would be crazy as I have a 0.6 permanent contract and I would be breaking that.

I have zero confidence left to even go for an interview

Would you be able to hand a notice in ASAP, work it until Easter holidays and then do supply afterwards to build your confidence?
you could maybe private tutor for extra rapport and experience in different environments just to build on your skills. You’re better than you give yourself credit for!

I’m just so scared of giving up a permanent job and then having nothing to fall back on. I’m

It would be scarier being permanently unhappy in your current role x

Did you get authorisation from your HT before taking on supply work at the other school?
It can be construed as conflict of interest.

Does the other school have a vacancy suitable for you at present? If so, I’d be having a conversation with them - even if its a full time role as you are currently working 5 days a week anyway.

@good96 no I don’t need my HTs permission she knew I was on the supply list and I have done supply in her school in the past many a time. There’s no FT permanent places only supply (strange system) covering mat leaves and illness.