To go into teaching primary in my 40s with a young family?

[Lollylamb]

Looking to hear some positive or negative experiences of people who have moved into teaching primary later in life, and with young children. I've seen a lot of people go into secondary teaching after a corporate career, but not really primary.

I've been in my current commercial role for 15 years and have really not enjoyed it at any point in time, and just find the corporate world very meaningless, stressful and unsatisfying. I've spent a little time volunteering in my children's school and have done a week long work experience in another primary (and planning one more). I've also been exposed to the negatives: large classes with very diverging abilities, special needs, ofsted pressures. Overall though, I am so keen on the job, I absolutely love working with little kids and I will enjoy the variety of a teacher's job.

But I'm worried I'm too old for it already (41), and that it will negatively impact my young children (I work flexibly now so spend a lot of time with them during the week after school.)

Anyone change career into teaching primary? Could you share your experiences?

I know it's mad to be thinking of it now with everything going on with strikes and ofsted, but the heart wants what it wants... Thank you in advance.

I personally think you're mad. The training alone is teh most full-on year I've ever done, then full-time teaching involves around 50-60 hours a week of commitment. Yes the holidays fit well around your kids but nothing else does.
Could you get a job as a TA for a couple of years to see if you like it and wait till your kids are a bit older? You're still young at 41 - I've had colleagues who have re-trained in their late 40s and even early 50s.

I do not want to sound negative just my perspective of the reality of being a teacher ( TAs are not responsible for the classes for which they provide assistance- they are vital but do not have the same stresses and can leave their work at work) I am doing a PGCE so I am living the life of a teacher on a full time placement as well as observing teachers all day across the whole school- as a PGCE or SCHITT you will work non stop- teacher training is known for being very labour intensive. Your ECTs maybe less brutal ( depends) but there is no such thing as flexible working during term time ( even the wonderful holidays don't attract enough people to the profession) quote from the staff room of a member of staff who is leaving " I'd rather have every evening and every weekend off than school holidays"
Teachers have families but it isnt family friendly during term time - almost everyone who is a mum works part time ( a mix of . 8 .6) being able to work part time around your family's needs is a blessing! I personally wouldnt not change that
Teaching is 7.45/ 5.45 minimum plus extra
The only people who work less might make it out at 4.30 but they have exceptionally well organised departments with all lesson plans ready that require very minor adjustments
Unfortunately i work in a very efficient school with staff who has a wealth of experience - nobody leaves before 5/30/6
Trainees will stay till 7/8

There is little flexibility during term time. You wont get to see day time performances etc. The days are endless during term time. The marking load in primary is huge. You will be marking well into the night every day during the week.

You will lose a day planning at the weekend.

The pay has barely moved in over ten years, and the government is barely moving it now. And there is zero public support like with nursing, so little chance of that pressure on the govt. what you might consider enough money now will probably not be enough in a further ten years.

heads are reluctant in primary to give anyone a TLR. They expect teachers to take on extra whole school responsibilities for free. In their own time.

What do you get paid at the moment? Could you drop to 3 or 4 days a week in your current job and then volunteer in a school the other day or two a week?

I work full time in primary and have a child and it is incredibly stressful and exhausting.

I would definitely not recommend it. Most of us are looking to get out.

I work in primary. Trained in my 30s before becoming a parent. Training was full on and intense, would have struggled with a family (especially a young family)! First couple of years post-qualifying were hard work too. But crack through that and you do eventually reach a point (near breaking point) where you realise it's just a job, and you learn to work smarter not harder. The romanticised view of teaching leaves I suppose. And that's when you start leaving work at school and get weekends and evenings back (for the most part, not when there is parent evenings or reports to write though). I don't love the admin and most of the job is admin (or it certainly feels that way) - even when you're teaching the children, you're teaching them with data targets in mind and wondering how you are going to evidence the things they can do so you can tick that box.

If you work in the same school as your kids attend, you might have a chance of catching them in a dress rehearsal of their school play, or you might see them start their race on sports day, but you'll miss equally as much too and your children will be spending a lot of time in wraparound and after school clubs.

Am I glad I did it? Yes. It would have been one of those niggly things that I'd have regretted not doing otherwise.
Has it been worth it? Not sure.
Will I stay in teaching? Probably not.

Thanks @Teapleasemilknosugar that's a really useful perspective. Not being able to attend my own kids' events is probably the most off-putting aspect of it. Lots to think about.

Thank you @powerpufff @CeciliaMars @Brumplan @PaigeMatthews @Oxterguff

Definitely what I've been hearing from other sources as well. I work hard as it is now, and worrying/working evenings/weekends is not that uncommon to me. Lots of other jobs are demanding in that way, but I can see how being responsible for little kids probably feels different.

would be interested in anyone with a positive view, if such a person exists!

maybe a school nursery position would suit you although childcare costs may outweigh the change of career

I'm 41, my daughters are 10 and 7, and I am an ECT1 having done SCITT part time. I love it - I work bloody hard, and it's intense, but it's the best thing I've ever done. However, I was a TA for 4 years prior.

I should add that my husband works from home (and is senior enough to be flexible) and does the school run in the morning; without him it would be impossible.

No I would not recommend- as previously stated it is low paid, long hours non flexible and doesn't fit in around children. You can do better. Most if us are biding time until we can get out.

I am 46 and ECT2 with 2 primary aged children. It has been very hard work but doable with determination and a good support network. DH works in a more flexible job and is able to do school drop offs and performances etc and my Mum lives locally and does a couple of pickups per week.

I was really lucky to find a supportive school where I got some TA experience and then trained and stayed as ECT. I can't see myself wanting to work anywhere else.

I changed career from arts management and it has helped me keep a sense of perspective as I truly appreciate all that teaching gives - and all the negatives it took me away from in my old career. Yes it is frustrating and exhausting at times but I take a lot of pride and pleasure in my work. I am older than most of the teaching staff but I don't really think about that much. The biggest issue is the school wanting me to take on more responsibility when I am happy just being a class teacher.

Just to say that I am starting a pgce part time after Easter. I’m 44 and have 3 kids - two primary and one secondary. I have massive misgivings about whether I will cope as DH also has full on job and we don’t have family nearby. But I’ve wanted to do this for so long that I am going to just try. If I don’t end up staying in teaching I will have a good qualification and options…. This doesn’t mean I’m not awake at night worrying about it!

@MsJuniper Thank you so much for your reply. It's good to see a positive view. I feel, like you, that having a long previous career offers a different perspective.

@dreamsofsleep good luck! I'm so glad to hear of someone else taking the leap. We are either all mad, or perhaps hopefully our "advanced" age and many years of parenting will help us with the challenges of teaching.

I'm a PGCE student at a similar age and have a child at primary and one at secondary. It is a tough year, but (so far) manageable. My uni has been hugely helpful in terms of placement school location and mentors have been understanding that I have to leave to collect my youngest from afterschool provision by 6 pm. I am planning late in the evenings (but that is also partly because the dc have evening clubs and I don't want them to miss out).

I mentored a 30 yr old lady doing her pgce who had 2 young kids and became pregnant half way through. She's now teaching full time until she's fully qualified and will then go part time. I honestly don't know how she did it and it took its toll on her health wise.

I have had a varied and mostly happy teaching career - the only time I was deeply unhappy was when working full time in a state primary school during the pandemic (have 2 secondary aged kids).

You aren't too old. I also went into secondary teaching aged 41, with 4 kids. However, get some decent work experience before you decide. Doing reading with EYFS doesn't count, trust me!

Careful you don't derail this into a phase bashing thread! And certainly don't discount EYFS teachers. I trained in secondary then spent the majority of my teaching career in primary including a stint in EYFS. I know which phase I found hardest/longest hours/heaviest workload etc, but everyone has their own perspective. Reading with any year group is just that, reading. Not work experience. Definitely get some work experience first. My previous career was in financial and actuarial services. Teaching is a harder grind, whichever phase you go into.

Gosh, not denigrating teaching EYFS at all! I agree. Just that decent work experience is essential.

I trained at 34 and work 0.7 now and I love it. I didnt find my training year anywhere near as intense as people had said it would be. My children were 4 and 6 at the time. One still pre school and 1 in year 1. Best thing I ever did but I do really love the job. I do have a good support network with my mum doing a couple of school pick ups each week.

You are definitely not too old. I'm 38 with 2 children under 6. I'm leaving teaching this year because I can't handle the hours and other peoples kids getting more of me than my own.

I did my primary PGCE at 37. Really hard work but just about doable. The problem is that really hard work but just about doable becomes your life forever more. Your family will be ok picking up all the slack at first but will lose patience as it becomes a permanent situation. Your DCs will stop telling you about their day or coming to you with problems as they can sense you don't have the time or capacity to listen to them.
As you get more experienced, some things get easier but then you get more responsibility piled on. I lasted four years and would never go back.

First of all, you are not too old!

A few things to consider:

-Published salaries don't show you the fairly large deduction for pensions, but starting at 41, due to the years of service, I don't think you'd get the same pension as someone who started teaching in their 20s. I don't know if this is a concern for you?

-How would you manage parents' evenings and other occasional late night commitments?

-What's your plan for your children being unwell in term time?

-Will you be able to find regular time at home to work in the evenings and weekends?

I do think there are benefits, such as being able to spend the holidays with your children, and you can progress your career whilst working part time in some schools. But the PGCE year is intense, and there's no guarantee of a permanent contract at the end of it in Primary.

I think I have an addition that hasn't yet been mentioned.

I left teaching after 2/3 years - I became pregnant in my NQT year (when it was just one year) and went back part time afterwards for 1.5 years. I LOVE teaching and had the exact same attitude that my corporate job had working evenings/pressure so if I was going to be subject to this anyway, I may as well be doing something I love. The thing that pushed me out was my inexperience. I saw colleagues who could juggle teaching and being a mum but they usually had a few more years of experience than I did and felt comfortable winging it a bit more. I fell to pieces with anxiety over the thought of turning up the next day without knowing what I would be doing in every lesson. I got there early every morning and stayed as late as I could but had to pick up my daughter and I was never prepared and always anxious. My mental health suffered incredibly. When I was with my daughter, I felt like I should be working and vice versa. Within 2 months of leaving teaching, I came off my antidepressants and felt in control of my life for the first time since before my daughter was born.

Essentially, what I'm saying is that a lot of it will come down to your personality as well. How would you feel if you were asked to teach 5 hours tomorrow and you haven't prepared everything and you might have to make it up for some of that lesson? If the very thought makes you nervous, don't do it. Because from what I can see that is the only way to teach and give enough of yourself to your children.

I wish I could be more positive, I really do. It's a wonderful profession with tons of positives - if you make it your priority. If your children are your priority, I don't think there is room for teaching right now. As PPs have said, look into it again when your children are a bit older perhaps. I hope to return to teaching one day but for now, my daughter will only be this young once. Good luck!