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The staffroom

Whether you're a permanent teacher, supply teacher or student teacher, you'll find others in the same situation on our Staffroom forum.

Teaching full time with three small children.

26 replies

Internationalwomendayheadquarters · 23/03/2023 17:52

Is there anyone out there teaching with small children? I’ve got an interview next week. Secondary humanities subject - lots of marking expected if I’m successful at interview. Kids are 7, 4 and 2. I have very limited support (as in no grandparents etc at all) but DH could do the odd drop off and pick up.

The job is full time.

I do have other options - DH has asked me to work in his business and this would be flexible around kids, and I’ve got my own side hustle - an airbnb property.

Does anyone have any thoughts about this situation? On the one hand, I’d like to be more fulfilled intellectually but I know the workload is going to be really tough on my family. I’m at that point in life (37 with 3 kids) and I simply don’t know which direction to take.

OP posts:
WonderingWanda · 23/03/2023 18:22

Not in the same position, I went part time so I could manage the workload. All the women I know who manage it have lots of family support. You could try it and see how it goes for a year, if you are struggling you could always put in a flexible working request to drop one day which would give you some breathing space until the kids are older and more self sufficient.

Internationalwomendayheadquarters · 23/03/2023 19:07

WonderingWanda · 23/03/2023 18:22

Not in the same position, I went part time so I could manage the workload. All the women I know who manage it have lots of family support. You could try it and see how it goes for a year, if you are struggling you could always put in a flexible working request to drop one day which would give you some breathing space until the kids are older and more self sufficient.

Thanks @WonderingWanda that’s helpful.

Part time not an option here.

OP posts:
OutDamnedSpot · 23/03/2023 20:03

Is it a teaching role or training?

Internationalwomendayheadquarters · 23/03/2023 20:10

OutDamnedSpot · 23/03/2023 20:03

Is it a teaching role or training?

It’s a teaching role.

OP posts:
BG2015 · 23/03/2023 20:16

I taught full time with two children under 5 and also ended up as a single parent as they both turned 4 and 6. It wasn't great but I did it and they're now in their 20's.

It's hard, you need to be organised and have good childcare and family to support you. Couldn't have done it without my parents.

OutDamnedSpot · 23/03/2023 20:35

Ah. Okay. If you’re already qualified and this is a full time role, then theoretically it could get easier in the future (e.g. once you’ve been there a while you could negotiate to part time, have some say in which classes you teach, etc) so I’d consider it. If it was a training role, I’d have advised against it as its likely to get harder not easier!

I teach full time with two children (now as a single parent) and have found it manageable. I do have excellent support from my mum though - she covers illnesses, parents’ evening, etc.

Internationalwomendayheadquarters · 23/03/2023 20:49

Thank you @OutDamnedSpot thats helpful and yes I agree about negotiating better conditions etc.

The issue is I don’t have much support and I think it could be really tricky.

OP posts:
OutDamnedSpot · 23/03/2023 20:54

Might be be worth asking about part time / reduced hours at the interview stage? With how recruitment is at the moment, you might be in a stronger position than you expect.

Internationalwomendayheadquarters · 23/03/2023 21:05

Yes, asking about part time hours would be good. That sounds reasonable.

OP posts:
Youreatragedystartingtohappen · 23/03/2023 22:09

This is me! I teach full time and I have a 1 year and 4 year old. No family help during the week. It's a lot but it is doable.

The things that have made it doable for me are having bullet proof childcare, an OH who isn't a teacher who can help with when I have later finishes and a very understanding wonderful school that is very easy in terms of commute. Oh and meal boxes for quick healthy meals so I don't have a diet wholly consisting of caffeine and sugar.

This weeks been tough as I'm completely done in but it is getting easier after a really tricky first term when I honestly felt I was doing everything terribly. Please get in touch with me if you have any more questions but wishing you the best of luck whatever you decide to do

Internationalwomendayheadquarters · 23/03/2023 22:42

Youreatragedystartingtohappen · 23/03/2023 22:09

This is me! I teach full time and I have a 1 year and 4 year old. No family help during the week. It's a lot but it is doable.

The things that have made it doable for me are having bullet proof childcare, an OH who isn't a teacher who can help with when I have later finishes and a very understanding wonderful school that is very easy in terms of commute. Oh and meal boxes for quick healthy meals so I don't have a diet wholly consisting of caffeine and sugar.

This weeks been tough as I'm completely done in but it is getting easier after a really tricky first term when I honestly felt I was doing everything terribly. Please get in touch with me if you have any more questions but wishing you the best of luck whatever you decide to do

Thank you so much for your reply and well done for making it all work.

Totally agree on your two key points- bullet proof childcare and short commute!

OP posts:
Applerumbl · 24/03/2023 15:59

What do you do at the moment? Teaching full time/part time/sahm? I think that background info is relevant.
You mention lots of marking in your op but teaching is so much more than marking out of school hours these days.

Internationalwomendayheadquarters · 24/03/2023 22:40

@Applerumbl I’m at SAHM at the moment. Last taught in Dec 2020.

OP posts:
careerchange456 · 25/03/2023 07:58

I've been full time since my youngest was 18 months and he's now 6. DH works away all week so it's all on me.

Things that make it work:
• Reliable childcare for the kids - they're in after school care until 5-5:30. Some evenings they do a club at school and then go to ASC.
• Kids eat at ASC and then have a substantial snack when we get home (cheese and crackers, chopped fruit & veg, Greek yogurt, porridge, etc)
• Weekly cleaner
• Minimal ironing
• Kids activities at the weekends and Friday evening.
• DH picks up on a Friday. I stay and work as late as I need to to minimise weekend working.
• Weekends are family time but DH knows if there's something big on (reports etc) that I'll need some time and he has to take the kids off.
• I cook extra at the weekend so I have some meals for the week. I do get lunch at school on some days, even a jacket potato, so I've had a main meal.
• Work once they're in bed. Not ideal but limited other options!

Applerumbl · 25/03/2023 08:09

Internationalwomendayheadquarters · 24/03/2023 22:40

@Applerumbl I’m at SAHM at the moment. Last taught in Dec 2020.

So not that long ago really, like everyone has already said, make sure you have solid childcare and you can make it work and if it doesn't work, quit, it's an employees market at the moment for teaching you can negotiate part time much more easily.
Good luck!

themonkeysnuts · 28/03/2023 18:06

as above^^ solid childcare and backup plan if child ill or childminder/nursery wont have them in
also will childcare fees cost more than you are earning
factor in - early starts &late finishes , marking- planning (depending on school scheme) staff meetings - trips
do able but possibly stressful full time

Teachingteacher · 05/05/2023 20:47

I have two DC, 5 years and 8 months. I couldn’t do it full time. I’m HoD and work 4 days per week at an international IB school. Teaching load is 18 hours + HoD responsibilities.

I just about manage, but it’s reliant on a super organised meal-prep system, after school clubs, going to bed at 8:30pm every night and not having much of a social life. I would like to cut back more, 50% load would be perfect, but losing the HoD role would affect my salary too much.

Perhaps try it and see how you manage. But don’t feel bad if you can’t. My colleague came back after her third DC and has now cut back to 50%. It was just too much, which I completely understand.

Dendron123 · 06/05/2023 17:18

Good luck!

I was SAHM for too long and couldn't get back in to permanent jobs.

As I am now finding out there is also a long term consequence in terms of pension.

All the best. Make sure you're doing what is right for you.

Hayliebells · 06/05/2023 19:30

I definitely would not teach full time in your situation, as you don’t need to. But going to the interview and asking about the possibility of a part time position is a really good idea. You haven’t really lost anything by going to the interview, and you might just come away with a part-time teaching job. Ime schools don’t always advertise part-time, but lots would consider part-time, especially now that there’s such a dire recruitment and retention crisis!

Hayliebells · 06/05/2023 19:35

But on a related note, why do you presume there’ll be lots of marking? Things have changed quite a bit very recently in most schools, most have moved to a Whole Class Feedback system, rather than lengthy comments on work. Exercise books are now no longer marked in most places. That side of it might be better than you remember, and if this particularly school is behind the times in terms of its marking policy, you’ll likely be able to find one that is more progressive.

MarnieCres · 08/05/2023 10:20

I reduced to part-time once I realised I couldn't give to my own children. Exhausted.
Final straw was when I was considering bathing them at 17.30 and putting them to bed, straight from childcare, because after a day in school, I could hardly speak to my own.

itwillonlygetbetter · 08/05/2023 19:07

Hayliebells · 06/05/2023 19:35

But on a related note, why do you presume there’ll be lots of marking? Things have changed quite a bit very recently in most schools, most have moved to a Whole Class Feedback system, rather than lengthy comments on work. Exercise books are now no longer marked in most places. That side of it might be better than you remember, and if this particularly school is behind the times in terms of its marking policy, you’ll likely be able to find one that is more progressive.

Are you talking about secondary? Primary we have to mark fully every day - so an average day is marking 90+ exercise books plus highlighting learning objectives etc

Semtee · 08/05/2023 19:21

Why can your husband only do the odd drop off and pick up? That's the thing that'd make it hard for me. I work 4 days (in a primary) with small children and make it work, but I some weeks I do no drop offs and pick ups. It really limits your working day when you do. Obviously it might be hard for your husband but it might well be equally hard for you!

Hayliebells · 08/05/2023 19:23

itwillonlygetbetter · 08/05/2023 19:07

Are you talking about secondary? Primary we have to mark fully every day - so an average day is marking 90+ exercise books plus highlighting learning objectives etc

Yes, Secondary. The OP is Secondary Humanities.

Bringnbuy77 · 04/06/2023 09:19

I don’t do anything to do with pick ups or drop offs, get to work at 7.45 and leave at 5.45. Breakfast club and childminder after school, I sometimes collect from the childminder if my husband is running late but try and leave it up-to him. I try really hard not to do anything at home with these hours unless it’s something mundane I can do in front of the tv! We tried occasional grandparents etc but it made it really stressful now we just pay for childcare regardless and just lose the money if it means the kids get to do something nicer, although they love the childminders.

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