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Whether you're a permanent teacher, supply teacher or student teacher, you'll find others in the same situation on our Staffroom forum.

Original poster

Mat leave return and it’s chaos

14 replies

MrsLeaf · 14/01/2023 23:19

I moved prior to mat leave. To be honest I think the time out gave me time to reflect and think about how happy I am in the profession as a whole. As time has gone on I’ve grown more resentful and I'm struggling to really enjoy teaching.

It may well be that the new place isn’t the best fit? But how does one figure that out? Keep moving? The issue with that is I know how awful that looks on a CV!

My main issue has been this sudden influx of parental complaints! It’s been constant and I feel like I’m always doing something wrong? Briefly speaking the complaints have been: parent 1 - I rang home to speak about bad behaviour, dad was in complete denial that child would ever misbehave. Apparently I was being horrible and needed to get a grip, call got very confrontational so I hung up and they stormed into school demanding I stop teaching. Parent 2 - mother felt that child’s growth was stunted by my teaching (bottom set) so demanded a move. When I told child I’m not entirely sure if the move could happen. Parent rings HT and states that “I was vile to her child”. Parent 3 - very angry with me for ringing hime saying I was concerned with the recent mock score. So they’re now demanding meetings with my team leader to discuss. Making out like I’m somehow incompetent. But the child hasn’t been working because they’re ADHD and they can’t concentrate and I have no TA to help me with 29 kids. Parent 4 - claiming I was unfair to their child because they haven’t been attending my lessons and played truant twice and then ran into another teachers lessons when mine were on. I then explained to the child it needed to stop and the dad is very annoyed.

My manager keeps telling me “don’t worry” and I see where he’s coming from but this is 4 complaints in the space of sept - jan. It’s relentless and I don’t hear that any other teachers have this many complaints. There’s a meeting happening next Friday with 2 sets of parents. Not sure if I should be requesting to be there with my manager. It feels like I should?

What should I be doing? Contacting my union? Getting a grip? Seeking a new school? I’m at a loss here.

OP posts:
TortolaParadise · 14/01/2023 23:32

Not sure...but I am supporting you. It could just be the cohort of parents. What is the mood of your school like otherwise? It sounds as if your line manager is approachable. That is a positive! What would you ask the union?

Original poster
MrsLeaf · 14/01/2023 23:40

TortolaParadise · 14/01/2023 23:32

Not sure...but I am supporting you. It could just be the cohort of parents. What is the mood of your school like otherwise? It sounds as if your line manager is approachable. That is a positive! What would you ask the union?

It’s intense I’ll be honest so many resignation’s being handed in

OP posts:
TortolaParadise · 14/01/2023 23:49

Well, resignation date is 28th February so you have a reasonable chunk of time to look around. Keep all options open.

Original poster
MrsLeaf · 14/01/2023 23:49

Also, yes I know even though he says don’t worry. In turn all I do is word has I feel like I’m doing something wrong to cause all these complaints. No one else seems to be having such trouble.

OP posts:
Margo34 · 14/01/2023 23:50

Nothing wrong with moving schools, it happens a lot. I'm guessing you're secondary? I've worked a series of 1yr mat contracts (in primary) and never had any issues with career history "looking awful" - depends how you present it and talk about them all in cover letters and interviews IME.

But that aside, sounds like you have a needy cohort of parents. Try not take to personally, think of it more that they're angry at the education system than you - as you said, 29 kids, 1 ADHD, no Ta. That's not your fault. You can only do so much! Still, no harm in looking at other vacancies before the deadline....

Margo34 · 14/01/2023 23:53

And, IME, you just know if a school isn't the right fit. Lack of support is a big flag. Unachievable expectations from leadership. Bullying from above. You just know. Intuition.

Original poster
MrsLeaf · 14/01/2023 23:56

Margo34 · 14/01/2023 23:53

And, IME, you just know if a school isn't the right fit. Lack of support is a big flag. Unachievable expectations from leadership. Bullying from above. You just know. Intuition.

It was taken out of desperation. It’s not where my heart truly was. But I feel a bit pathetic looking when I’ve barely given it a chance. The levels of complaints are dragging me down though. Even if my manager says it’s fine. I’ve found myself now asking him “are you 100% sure you don’t feel it’s me”

Oh also, the other thing is they (hod) did a drop
in into my lesson and stayed. They’re all saying “it’s just to watch the kids” but I’m just feeling like that’s not the case. And it’s me they’re watching.

OP posts:
Margo34 · 15/01/2023 00:03

Nothing pathetic about looking after a short time in a role. The shortest time I was in a role before looking at other options was about 3 weeks 😂 there wasn't much available at that time so it made me grateful to have a job at least.

Maybe try and pick something positive to end each week, make a positive phonecall to a parent about one of your students, so a complaint is not the last thing you go home thinking about.

Drop-ins, no drop-ins, they're always watching. It's disconcerting not to be trusted or respected to get on with our jobs but I don't see that changing any time soon, sadly.

Original poster
MrsLeaf · 15/01/2023 00:07

Margo34 · 15/01/2023 00:03

Nothing pathetic about looking after a short time in a role. The shortest time I was in a role before looking at other options was about 3 weeks 😂 there wasn't much available at that time so it made me grateful to have a job at least.

Maybe try and pick something positive to end each week, make a positive phonecall to a parent about one of your students, so a complaint is not the last thing you go home thinking about.

Drop-ins, no drop-ins, they're always watching. It's disconcerting not to be trusted or respected to get on with our jobs but I don't see that changing any time soon, sadly.

Maybe education isn’t the right place for me, I’ve battled with the idea of just doing something else. However, I feel like I have no skills.

OP posts:
good96 · 16/01/2023 15:20

From what you’re saying on your posts - it seems to me that leadership in your school requires improvement evidenced by the number of resignations but also behaviour management - it doesn’t seem like they support their teaching staff well - you should be having TA support in large classes with students that have complex needs.

You can’t please everyone to be fair - you can tell that you have the best interests of the students in mind the fact that you’re making phone calls- not many teachers do that now.
If I was you, I would be looking for another job and leave at Easter - the earliest opportunity- forget the CV - your health is more important and you need to be in the right job. What is the job market like in your area? Does your previous school (s) have any vacancies - You do need to get out!!

Original poster
MrsLeaf · 16/01/2023 17:30

good96 · 16/01/2023 15:20

From what you’re saying on your posts - it seems to me that leadership in your school requires improvement evidenced by the number of resignations but also behaviour management - it doesn’t seem like they support their teaching staff well - you should be having TA support in large classes with students that have complex needs.

You can’t please everyone to be fair - you can tell that you have the best interests of the students in mind the fact that you’re making phone calls- not many teachers do that now.
If I was you, I would be looking for another job and leave at Easter - the earliest opportunity- forget the CV - your health is more important and you need to be in the right job. What is the job market like in your area? Does your previous school (s) have any vacancies - You do need to get out!!

I have been trying to do my best by calling home but now I feel like I don’t want to because I just get pounced on by helicopter parents shouting at me and making out like their children are hard done by from me.

I feel like even by doing my job I’ve done something wrong, I try my best at all times and I’m just feeling very discouraged. I’ve been to 4 previous schools and in all honesty I feel like moving always brings a new set of challenges (problems!)

OP posts:
Postapocalypticcowgirl · 16/01/2023 19:39

If it would reassure you to talk to your union rep then do- I am sure they will be happy to speak to you.

Depending on your subject, in secondary, one short term role is unlikely to be a problem on your CV.

In some ways, I think it's easier to leave when you don't have much loyalty to a school or long term attachments to the students.

Original poster
MrsLeaf · 16/01/2023 20:32

Postapocalypticcowgirl · 16/01/2023 19:39

If it would reassure you to talk to your union rep then do- I am sure they will be happy to speak to you.

Depending on your subject, in secondary, one short term role is unlikely to be a problem on your CV.

In some ways, I think it's easier to leave when you don't have much loyalty to a school or long term attachments to the students.

I shall do this. Also most roles I’ve done were FT so that’s a slight worry. It looks like I’ve job hopped

OP posts:
WayDownInTheHole · 16/01/2023 22:23

This all feels very familiar.

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