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The staffroom

Whether you're a permanent teacher, supply teacher or student teacher, you'll find others in the same situation on our Staffroom forum.

The Thirty-Fifth Republic - Covid - the gift that keeps on giving even during the Christmas Break

999 replies

SantaAssociationRepresentitve · 23/12/2020 20:47

You are most welcome to this school staff support thread to get us through stressful times. It is meant for school staff only – a sort of room of requirement. Baiters, haters, goaders, and bashers can jog on somewhere else.

If you are NOT staff and just have a general education query please start your own thread.

You can play here if you are a member of one the following groups-

-ABBA - anti bashers and baiting association
-SWAB - school workers against bashers
-SWOT - school workers opposing teacherbashers
-STARS - schoolworkers together against ranting + slurs

Do not give the staffroom password just in case it attracts the wrong sort

Other requirements for staff room entry include the ability to find the staff room, the ability to find a clean mug in the staff room, knowledge of the photocopier codes, and the ability to sniff out where the booze is stashed - Thirsty Tuesdays, Fizz Fridays now in operation.

If you come with a stick to goad us then that is not allowed in the staffroom and you will receive a detention

OP posts:
Thread gallery
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RigaBalsam · 28/12/2020 13:35

Hugs piggy. What a nightmare!

KatherineOfGaunt · 28/12/2020 13:37

@GleamingBaubles

Has anyone made a "where the fuck is Gavin?" song yet? Because if they haven't, someone needs to!
So, some of the lines don't scan properly, but it's just about singable to the obvious tune!

*

Boris shrugged when he was asked
And he said “Someone will have to be tasked…. Not Gavin.”
We rushed to the TV and turned it on
And could hardly believe our eyes,
As bloody Gove bleated out the education line.

Oh, I’m sure he’s camera shy
Or just on holiday.
It’s really rubbish timing
But the DfE won’t say.
‘Cause for days we’ve been wondering
Where the fuck is Gavin?

DfE announcements, well, they come and go.
But Gav is still in hiding and now we wanna know
Why we’ve got to get used to not seeing Gavin? (Gavin? Where the fuck is Gavin?)

He grew up in Yorkshire, went to a local school
But his wife was a teacher, so I guess it’s cool
That he’s Ed Sec.
Except he clearly doesn’t care
About school staff, and if it’s fair
That no protection means we get it in the neck.

Oh, I’m sure he’s camera shy
Or just on holiday.
It’s really rubbish timing
But the DfE won’t say.
‘Cause for days we’ve been wondering
Where the fuck is Gavin? (Gavin? Where the fuck is Gavin?)

DfE announcements, well, they come and go.
But Gav is still in hiding and now we wanna know
Why we’ve got to get used to not seeing Gavin? (Gavin? Where the FUCK is Gavin?)

January calls and schools will have to start
But NobleGiraffe proved with a chart
That schools aren’t safe.

Gove said “Schools will test”
But we all said “It’s such a mess”
As the Government stuck their fingers in their ears… (“Cheers, lads, thanks. Okay, we’ll just be the bad guys.”)

Oh, I’m sure he’s camera shy
Or just on holiday.
It’s really rubbish timing
But the DfE won’t say.
‘Cause for days we’ve been wondering
Where the fuck is Gavin? (Gavin? Where the FUCK is Gavin?)

DfE announcements, well, they come and go.
But Gav is still in hiding and now we wanna know
Why we’ve got to get used to not seeing Gavin? (Gavin? WHERE THE FUCK IS GAVIN?)

noblegiraffe · 28/12/2020 13:37

My next book has 1219 pages so I don't think I'll manage 50 books in 2021 if I start with that one!

DecemberStar · 28/12/2020 13:39

Am sure it's brill but I don't know what the tune is, sorry?!

From Data thread, worrying (not new stuff re children though). Hope people in the meeting now (which someone said is COBRA is it??) are aware of these data:

mobile.twitter.com/chrischirp/status/1343533841550618625

noblegiraffe · 28/12/2020 13:40

Omg Katherine that is amazing. Did you just come up with that Shock

Has someone got a ukulele and a youtube account? Could totally go viral.

KatherineOfGaunt · 28/12/2020 13:40

@DecemberStar - Who the fuck is Alice? by Smokie!

DecemberStar · 28/12/2020 13:41

I'm ok will have to google that one! (Does this make me old and out of touch??)

DecemberStar · 28/12/2020 13:42

*Ah OK

KatherineOfGaunt · 28/12/2020 13:42

@noblegiraffe

Omg Katherine that is amazing. Did you just come up with that Shock

Has someone got a ukulele and a youtube account? Could totally go viral.

Yeah, just wrote it. (Planning? What planning?) I'm a fan of contrafactum! Smile
Timeturnerplease · 28/12/2020 13:46

@KatherineOfGaunt Cracking 👏🏼

Just received a photo message in WhatsApp group while trying to negotiate one adult at a time park outings. A friend in the group is working on a Covid ward and sent a photo message of herself. She looks awful (worryingly she’s also second trimester pregnant, higher risk as turning 40 next week) from all the PPE and extra shifts.

I sent a sympathetic message back, and she replied that she still feels safer in her role than she would be doing mine....

DecemberStar · 28/12/2020 13:46

Oh, that! Always thought it was called "Living next door to Alice". As you were.

MrsChristmasHamlet · 28/12/2020 13:46

That song is brilliant!

If anyone hasn't read Where the Crawdads sing, do. And also The Beekeeper of Aleppo

KatherineOfGaunt · 28/12/2020 13:46

@DecemberStar Grin It's from 1976!

CallmeAngelGabriel · 28/12/2020 13:46

I just was googling "Who the fuck is Alice," but then got distracted by the 'letter from school' thread. Angry

KatherineOfGaunt · 28/12/2020 13:48

@DecemberStar

Oh, that! Always thought it was called "Living next door to Alice". As you were.
Oh, yes, that too! I'm used to just calling it 'Who the...', so sorry for the confusion!
GleamingBaubles · 28/12/2020 13:49

Brilliant! 😁

Halifaxgirl · 28/12/2020 13:49

I teach Reception ,everyday I am flushing / cleaning toilets ,wiping tears and occasionally bottoms .Not surprised that gov didn’t know school toilets don’t have lids to shut( to prevent faecal fountain spread apparently ).The guidance for primary spells out that young children cannot be expected to social distance and there are no mitigations to account for this .

NeurotreeWenceslas · 28/12/2020 13:53

Hmmm

The Thirty-Fifth Republic - Covid - the gift that keeps on giving even during the Christmas Break
SantaAssociationRepresentitve · 28/12/2020 13:53

@KatherineOfGaunt you are officially the group’s lyricist. Brilliant!

OP posts:
NeurotreeWenceslas · 28/12/2020 13:55

Sorry! I've just had an accidental nap with toddler!

Awesome song!

OnehorseopenBobsleigh · 28/12/2020 13:56

@KatherineOfGaunt
Amazing! Love that song anyway.
We just need someone who can do it justice time make a recording

Piggyinblankets · 28/12/2020 13:59

The Grauniad is attributing that to Give : he didn't say it. Jeremy Farrar of the Wellcome Trust said that.

Piggyinblankets · 28/12/2020 13:59

Gove.

PumpkinPie2016 · 28/12/2020 14:01

@KatherineOfGaunt that's hilarious Xmas Grin

Piggyinblankets · 28/12/2020 14:01

Loving it KoG.

I genuinely think he might be on holiday you know...