What would happen in your school?

[Corneliawildthing]

All our infants get free school lunch. After lunch they play in the playground. One parent, who claims other kids are hitting her child (they are not - in fact it's the other way round), now comes and stands in the playground, watching her daughter every lunchtime. There are always 2 playground supervisors in the area who "don't like to say anything to her" and the HT avoids confronting parents.

Would they really go home? I’ve been teaching for decades and hardly any children ever go home, often because both parents are at work but even households where there is an at home parent or no one working the children still don’t go home.

Clearly things are different where you are.

Yes a lot of children do go home. At the secondary school most go down the town to chip shops etc so it is very different here.

Flamingo if they didn't get free meals there would be a fraction of the amount of kids in the playground. The majority would go home

Really-why? That has never been the case in any infant school I’ve worked in. The odd child here or there has gone home for lunch sometimes but the majority stay. Do all of your families have at least one parent 100% at home?

This would never happen in any schools found here because the gates are locked.

This whole scenario is so far removed from anything I’ve experienced in 20+ years of teaching that I don’t know what to say!?

This is just baffling to me. Schools in England haven’t been like this since the 80s. Is it common in Scotland for anyone to be able to wander in to the playground? And a child could just wander out if the mood takes them?

Report the concerns in an email to the head, both with regards to the parent being in the playground and the more general lack of security that means absolutely anyone can get in and the children could get out.
I'm genuinely shocked the head has not addressed, it really does sound like a throw back to the 80's.
If you do not get a satisfactory response from the head escalate higher, and keep going till adequate safeguarding measures are in place. Say nothing and you are complicit in this.

How do they have time to go home and back ?
What's the point ?
I've been teaching since the late 90s in London and in British schools abroad and have never ever experienced pupils leaving for lunch. They either bring a packed lunch or eat school meals and play or have clubs at lunctimes.

I would bypass the head and go straight to local authority safeguarding. The head isn't listening.

Also the time out of the parents day. Even if you are 10 minutes from school what a faff.
Drop off a 8.45, home by 9, leaving again to pick up for lunch at 11.50, home for 12.10 then leaving again at 12.50 to drop off. Home again by 1.10 and then heading off again for 2.50 for pick up.*
What a huge pain in the arse every day.
Send them in with a packed lunch.

*All school times are made up.

This just wouldn't happen where I work.

1 The parent would have to climb over a high fence (has the school never had a runner?)

1. The head would have called the parent in for a meeting, even if they were jus t peering through the fence.

1. One of our assertive but polite staff would have asked her if they could help her, then ushered her in her merry way immediately. We have a TA who is very good at this.

Yes going home for lunch is a ridiculous faff. We asked if wd could reduce the lunchtime to 45 mins as an hour is s long time to stand out in the cold and it would cut down on incidents involving some older pupils.
The head put out a questionnaire to parents and the overwhelming response was no because they wouldn't have time to go home for lunch

Where on earth are you it sounds so removed from 2020 schooling and sounds 1950s except the parents rule the school

The answer is OP it just wouldn’t happen

There are definitely lots of schools in Scotland that are exactly like this. I work in one. Playgrounds are quite open with just gates that are closed but not locked. Yes the children could do a runner if they wanted to (and sometimes do). It's just something we all deal with at break/lunch times.

Thanks MrsPMT I was beginning to think I was in an alien universe! I think because schools elsewhere are so hot on security, they don't realise that there are still schools like ours.

The attitiude seems to be "It wouldn't happen here". Sadly in Dunblane, it did.

I am just in such a bad place at school atm. I hate what our school has become. It just seems to be one thing after another and nothing is done about any of it.

The attitiude seems to be "It wouldn't happen here".Sadly in Dunblane, it did.

But that was a long time ago. Did that not prompt schools near you to tighten up security?!

Yes a lot of children do go home. At the secondary school most go down the town to chip shops etc so it is very different here.

I'm in a Scottish village and this is very much the case here too. The primary gate is unlocked for kids going to and from home lunches and the high school doesn't even know where the pupils are during lunch time. Usually at the chippy etc. It's a very, VERY different system than when I lived in England.

You need to ask the woman to leave. Our primary has a pretty strong open door policy where parents are encouraged into the school for things like volunteering or soft start up to P3 (coming into class with your child in the mornings) so you will often see random parents inside the school up to around 9:20am. However, a parent IN the playground? Nope. That needs to stop. I wouldn't be happy with that because IF a kid hits hers, is she going to yell at them? Discipline or God forbid smack them?

Tell the HT you've had parent complaints who want to remain anonymous and she needs to be off premises or they're going to the local authority about it.

My DS and other kids in the class were being bullied and hit daily, often resulting in open wounds by a teacher's son (NT but spoiled rotten) so I and sometimes other mums, did stand outside the fence a few times so we could see for ourselves because our D.C. said the teachers weren't doing anything (who wants to call a friend and colleague in to let them know they need to deal with their son's bullying?!) and we could then quite rightly make proper complaints to the HT.

A new HT arrived and as she wasn't close childhood pals with the boy's mum like a majority of the staff were, she took action. The mum moved him to a different school because she didn't like being told one bit!

TBH maybe not a bad thing, maybe she will see what her little darling gets up to . The parents of the worst behaved kids are often the ones most in denial. As long as she's just watching and not getting involved in anything.

We had this conversation on Friday and it's a safeguarding issue. The safeguarding team need to speak to her

My child would not attend a school where security was so lax! Surely if anyone can just walk in, anyone can also just walk out?!

Just wouldn't happen here. DD's primary's a tiny village school and even that has decent fences, locked gates and you have to buzz to get in, be signed in and escorted at all times etc.

Tbh, my primary school in the eighties was completely fenced in with locked gates and that was before Dunblane!

There must be someone you can raise this with OP? What if the local perv decided to start standing in the playground every lunchtime watching the children? As if that'd be allowed to happen. Just because it's a mother doesn't mean that they're harmless. What would happen if she saw one of the kids arguing with hers for example? She'd intervene, that's what then you'd have a whole host of issues to deal with!

She did actually go up to a child she claimed had been laughing at her child and tried to tell him off a few weeks ago. Playground staff told the head who said " yes she's a wee bit anxious about her child because she's new".

How do school like this deal with looked after children? Or those that are subject to custody disputes? I can kind of see how fears of murderous rampages can be dismissed with an it won't happen here because they are thankfully very rare but I'm aware of 4 fostered/adopted children and a couple of nasty custody battles in our village school of 200 pupils (I am "incomer" who doesn't know all the gossip and everyone's life story so there are probably others I don't know about because they are children of my friends/friends of my DC).

Are you a teacher at the school OP?
I'm amazed you haven't contacted the local authority safeguarding unit.
I'm a midday supervisor. This just wouldn't happen at my school, but if it was happening I would be reporting it. That parent approached another child ffs!

I went to an NT property in England, with the village school in its grounds. The was no gates or high fences. I was very suprised how open it was.

But surely if their child is the one doing the hitting, then the parent will see this and back off?!

Aside from the huge safeguarding concern the other worry is other parents deciding to pitch up too.
She’s told off another child. If that child had gone home to tell their parent that they had been told of by Evie’s mother then the parent of the told off child is quite likely to take exception to this and also decide to spend their lunch time standing in the playground. Parent number 2 then says something to Oscar for picking on their child. Oscar’s parent is pissed off and they then come and stand in the playground.
It could never end. And how could you say no to one parent when you have created a precedent with the first.

@Corneliawildthing Was the child's parent who was 'told off' by the mother informed? Because if my child had been reprimanded by a random loitering parent in the playground rather than a member of school staff then I'd have gone absolutely nuclear. No problem with them being told off if they need it but only by teachers/supervisors etc!

It's just so weird! That HT need to either change they way she's doing things entirely with regard to this or find another job if she can't. Surely, surely she must see that it's a massive safeguarding issue?!